I'm sorry but I need to vent so here it goes...I honestly don't care if it sounds desperate but I want a boyfriend. I want that perfect guy that will cuddle with me, make me laugh, be there for me when I am upset, and will be mine and mine only. I want a valentine for valentine's day so I won't be spending it alone AGAIN. But you know what the sad part is? I will never have one because I am the ugliest, fattest, stupidest, cow of a girl that only has friends because of her personality. I wish I could be skinnier, prettier, funnier, smarter...Then I have my issues at home. My mom and I are constantly fighting, the bills are getting harder to pay, and my dad doesn't even want to be in my life anymore. He is haoppoily married again with 3 kids and a new wife. He cheated on my mom with his new wife when she was in the hospital getting treatement for the cancer she had. I mean don't get me wrong I thank god everyday that my mom is alive and well but I just wished she understood me better. I wish things could be different. I wish I never cut myself. I wish my dad cared about me. I wish I had a best friend that actually understands how I feel...I wish I was loved.