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Hilarious Quotes

  1. TheCovertComic TheCovertComic
    posted a quote
    March 27, 2021 5:56am UTC
    Spontaneity is the province of youth – though I hear Saskatchewan is pretty swingin' too.

  2. soldsoul soldsoul
    posted a quote
    October 26, 2016 12:04pm UTC
    exit the womb they saidlife will be great they said

  3. Amenah Amenah
    posted a quote
    February 7, 2016 4:17pm UTC
    if i'm gonna pretend to everyone else i'm A Okay Great Okay No Worries Friend then im gonna do myself the service of crying in my own personal spaces if thats oKay with you ,, haha

  4. Chloepatra* Chloepatra*
    posted a quote
    November 28, 2015 10:00am UTC
    Too many people undervalue what they are;
    And overvalue what they're not

  5. Chloepatra* Chloepatra*
    posted a quote
    November 28, 2015 9:47am UTC
    Kid: Whats a man?
    Dad: A man is someone who loves unconditionally, cares about you and protects you.
    Kid: When I grow up, I'll be a man like mom.

  6. goawayanthony* goawayanthony*
    posted a quote
    July 2, 2015 12:48pm UTC
    And thus God said unto Abraham, "Abraham."
    And Abraham replied, "What."
    God said to John "Come forth and recieve eternal life."
    But John came fifth and won a toaster.
    And Judas approached the rabbis and Pharisees
    "The one whom I kiss is the one you seek."
    To which they responded "Gay."
    And thus God made Eve, and she was Bammin' Slammin bootylicious.
    See you all in hell.

  7. absent * absent *
    posted a quote
    May 15, 2015 4:20am UTC
    the great gatsby is just hilarious because
    nick, the narrator, begins by talking about the advice
    his father gave him when he was younger.
    "whenever you feel like criticising any one just
    remember that all the people in this world haven't had
    the advantages that you've had."
    he explains how this caused him to "reserve all judgements"
    but he then spends the next 200 pages judging everyone

  8. Fat Amy* Fat Amy*
    posted a quote
    April 25, 2015 1:31pm UTC
    Dean: God?
    Castiel: He's gotta be here somewhere.
    Dean: Try New Mexico, I heard he was on a tortilla.
    Castiel: No, he's not on any flatbread

  9. phee phee
    posted a quote
    April 8, 2015 6:57pm UTC

    me & my room
    are twins,
    we're both a mess

  10. david12332197 david12332197
    posted a quote
    April 3, 2015 7:22pm UTC
    If you drop a baby, does the 5 second rule still apply?

  11. phee phee
    posted a quote
    March 18, 2015 10:34am UTC
    That picture was so
    It's going to have to be
    from the deleted

  12. Bec* Bec*
    posted a quote
    January 12, 2015 2:15am UTC
    I love the way you shut the heck up I love it.

  13. Bec* Bec*
    posted a quote
    January 12, 2015 2:13am UTC
    One time there was this end of year concert and our male principal
    came out in a wig and skirt and ran onto stage singing the dancing

  14. Bec* Bec*
    posted a quote
    January 12, 2015 2:11am UTC
    It's always fun and games until the internet run slower than me.

  15. Bec* Bec*
    posted a quote
    January 12, 2015 2:08am UTC
    Row, row, row your boat the heck away from me
    you better watch the frickity frack out bc my face will make you pee

  16. *Yours Truly* *Yours Truly*
    posted a quote
    January 7, 2015 7:15am UTC
    Thanks, 2014.
    For dumping a gorgeous guy into my life

  17. *Yours Truly* *Yours Truly*
    posted a quote
    January 1, 2015 9:20am UTC
    I can't even find youtube videos that explain how you function.

  18. *Yours Truly* *Yours Truly*
    posted a quote
    December 27, 2014 11:11pm UTC
    What's awkward is when you stop using the word "hard"
    because every time you do, you hear innuendos.

  19. *Yours Truly* *Yours Truly*
    posted a quote
    November 2, 2014 1:06am UTC
    I feel like my tongue would be safer in your mouth.

  20. GhostTown GhostTown
    posted a quote
    October 27, 2014 8:16pm UTC
    *Year 1990*
    *At school*
    Teacher: Keep your eyes on your paper and your paper only.
    *Year 2014*
    *At school*
    Teacher: Keep your eyes on your computer and your computer only.


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