Witty Profiles

unicorn001

1. unicorn001
   posted a quote
   November 23, 2013 9:37pm UTC
   Someone: unfollows me
   Me: hates own account and anonymous person for 2 minutes
   
   👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 37 points
2. unicorn001
   posted a quote
   November 3, 2013 8:07pm UTC
   *october ends*
   me: alright now seems like a pretty good time to be december
   me: wait what do you mean no matter how much you cry in your bedroom and pray for december it won't affect the order of the months
   
   👍 this is good · read the comments · 16 points
3. unicorn001
   posted a quote
   October 19, 2013 5:47pm UTC
   There are these two quotes:
   "If nothing goes right go left"
   and
   "Men to the left because women are always right."
   LOOK AT THEM. IF YOU GO LEFT THERE ARE MEN.
   So if nothing seems to be going right, go left- you'll get the boys there. (;
   
   👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 39 points
4. unicorn001
   posted a quote
   October 15, 2013 4:40pm UTC
   this background color
   makes my eyes water omg
   
   👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 8 points
5. unicorn001
   posted a quote
   October 7, 2013 4:01pm UTC
   That moment when
   you discover an old favorite song and you just sit there with your mouth completely open in awe
   format by formatsbymaisha - maiieeeshasha
   
   👍 this is good · read the comments · 25 points
6. unicorn001
   posted a quote
   October 2, 2013 4:02pm UTC
   AND I CAN'T CHANGE, EVEN
   IF I TRIED, EVEN IF I WANTED
   TO- MY FOOD MY FOOD MY FOOD SHE
   keeps me full.
   
   👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 34 points
7. unicorn001
   posted a quote
   September 27, 2013 8:48pm UTC
   eenie meenie minie moe,
   catch a boyfriend by his throat,
   if he hollers keep him close,
   because if you leave him you'll probably be like, forever alone.
   
   👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 20 points
8. unicorn001
   posted a quote
   September 19, 2013 4:11pm UTC
   Format chickittylover
   my school homework logic:
   ♒♒♒♒♒♒♒♒♒♒♒♒♒♒♒♒♒♒♒♒♒♒♒♒♒♒♒♒♒♒♒♒♒♒♒
   "maybe if i wait until midnight to do my homework it will dissapear"
   
   👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 39 points
9. unicorn001
   posted a quote
   September 13, 2013 3:38pm UTC
   i was so hot yesterday, you should have seen me!
   although that oven gave me a couple burns..
   
   👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 21 points
10. unicorn001
    posted a quote
    September 4, 2013 6:47pm UTC
    mom this morning: honey time to wake up for sch-
    me: no and no and no and no and no and no and finally no
    
    👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 34 points
11. unicorn001
    posted a quote
    August 29, 2013 2:00pm UTC
    walk into the school like
    what up- wait wtf there's no cute boys here ew bye
    
    👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 36 points
12. unicorn001
    posted a quote
    August 28, 2013 9:02pm UTC
    once in french class
    I had to do a paper on Justin Bieber.
    it was traumatic.
    
    👍 this is good · read the comments · 59 points
13. unicorn001
    posted a quote
    August 26, 2013 4:34pm UTC
    I wish you could block people in real life.
    
    👍 this is good · read the comments · 105 points
14. unicorn001
    posted a quote
    August 20, 2013 2:56pm UTC
    "Hey wanna see me break dance"
    *breaks every bone in body while dancing*
    
    👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 52 points
15. unicorn001
    posted a quote
    August 15, 2013 4:55pm UTC
    Does anyone else debate on
    whether to eat a snack or not eat a snack so you sit there for 30 minutes debating and then at the end you
    end up getting the snack anyway so not only have you just gotten fatter because there's no way you're going
    to be active and burn that off but you also wasted time ugh what is my life even lol
    
    👍 this is good · read the comments · 52 points
16. unicorn001
    posted a quote
    August 15, 2013 4:50pm UTC
    Forget 2 Chainz,
    2 degrees!
    -Jenna Marbles
    
    👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 20 points
17. unicorn001
    posted a quote
    July 28, 2013 5:58pm UTC
    "I just can't help myself, i'm falling for you!"
    *plummets 4,000 feet from a cliff* *dies*
    Please don't remove this!
    
    👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 35 points
18. unicorn001
    posted a quote
    July 26, 2013 2:00pm UTC
    i want to go to the first day of school and see whos in all my classes but then after that i dont want to go to school
    
    👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 31 points
19. unicorn001
    posted a quote
    July 26, 2013 1:58pm UTC
    medusa, trying to turn you to stone, but you accidentally called her “melissa” when you first walked in and now you’re too embarrassed to look at her. “it’s alright” she keeps saying “i get it all the time” but you still won’t look. you don’t even remember the stone thing until later
    
    👍 this is good · read the comments · 26 points
20. unicorn001
    posted a quote
    July 22, 2013 7:17pm UTC
    My life is a constant game of
    'How annoying can i be without someone killing me'
    
    👍 this is good · read the comments · 88 points

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