There was a time in my life when everything lined up perfectly. I was on top of the world. I thought, "Life is easy!" Then came the time when no matter what I did, I couldn't seem to get it right. I thought to myself "Life is so hard!" After all that, I just wanted to sleep. "Wake me up when this is all over.." I would say. That's when everything changed and my life was simply unrecognizable. So I learned to ride the waves, appreciate the blessings, and see life for what it really was. -- An Adventure
crimson24 posted a quote
October 27, 2016 11:22pm EDT
let me get personal here for a little. i just had this thought and my brain exploded. people get confused and sometimes irritated when i say that even a minute makes a difference. it's just a minute...right? what they dont know is that just 5 seconds made the biggest difference in...and for...my life. it isnt about petty arguments, whether to close up shop at 7:59 or if we should wait till 8:02. it's about a deeply rooted feeling in my soul that 5 seconds saved my life. 5 seconds. the difference between my family and loved ones mourning my death, and me being successful and thriving at a job i didnt even really ask for a couple years later. when someone says "it's only one minute, it doesnt matter"...my soul knows it does matter. so if i shoot you a glare at a remark about the time...dont take it personally. my body is just glad to be alive and breathing. thank you, i think im done now.
*Freedom* posted a quote
April 23, 2017 12:34pm EDT
"lets be realistic," he said with a scoff.I was being realistic. Yes, my reality was to spend the rest of my life with you.Yes, my reality was to grasp your face and connect our lips in a white dress.Yes, my reality was to hold your hand as my fingers dug within your flesh as the doctors yelled for me to push.Yes, my reality was to help you wash your gray short hair and tease each other about our wrinkles.Yes, my reality was to stare at grandchildren as we reminisced about our lives.You were my reality, and I was being realistic."you're right," I mumbled in agreement, "i need to be realistic."I was being realistic.
When I first started climbing the tree of love, I knew better than to pick the fruit hanging lowest from the tree, the fruit that I didn't want because I am not desperate. But as I climbed further and further up, I began to find it more and more difficult to get what I wanted from the tree. My friends wanted me to pick perfectly good fruit that I never ended up picking because it didn't feel right. I was too unsure of whether the fruit was right for me even though the fruit clearly wanted me. I want to take risks, I want to get out of my comfort zone, but I am still too scared to pick fruit that isn't as round as I'd usually go for because I am not particularly impressed by it initially. Yet the fruit I was sure about, the fruit that gave me butterflies in my stomach, the fruit that I felt in my heart was right for me and what I truly wanted, I tried to pick it. But it wouldn't budge. Later on, I tried again with a different fruit that gave me the same feelings. The stem cracked from the branch but refused to detach from it. My heart was broken. It broke even more when I saw girls who wanted those same fruits that gave me butterflies and made my heart race pick them with ease. Hell, those fruits almost fell on their faces. More fruit started to call for me but I didn't pick them because none of them made me feel the way other fruit did. And that's when I asked myself, "Should I pick what I don't particularly care for much? Is it worth it? Is it worth not feeling butterflies for someone who treats you well and understands you but doesn't give you that "feeling" inside? Is continuing to climb this tree going to hurt me in the end? Will I die before I reach the top because I never picked a fruit? Do I even deserve fruit, am I too picky to pick fruit? Will I ever find a fruit I am sure about, fruit that gives me butterflies in my stomach, fruit that I feel in my heart is right for me and what I truly want that will fall off of the tree just for me?" I don't know the answer to any of this, but I am starting to think maybe the tree of love just wasn't meant for me to climb.
"It's okay. You'll be alright." "..." "A number doesn't define you. A test score doesn't define you. You're greater than that." "Tell that to the people who decided that cramming 70+ questions on a sheet of paper and saying I should know and answer everything in 10 minutes is a good plan to judge if I'm a good and knowledgeable person. Tell that to the people who pay thousands upon thousands to get into college. Tell that to the people who stay up for hours and hours trying to pass an exam they'll forget about the next week. Tell that to the people who are pure geniuses and have the privilege to go anywhere and do anything. Tell that to the business bosses who won't even glance my way unless I have a bachelors degree. Tell those people that a number doesn't define me. They won't listen. They'll look at my skin and look at my gender and look at the number that has graded me for 12+ years and say ' I'm sorry. You aren't qualified. ' That simply isn't how the world works and I simply don't fit in."