You are born, go to school, and attend university in search of a husband. You get married – even if he is the worst man in the world – just so that others can’t say no one wants you. You have children, grow old, and spend the end of your days watching passersby from a chair on the sidewalk, pretending to know everything about life yet unable to silence the voice in your heart that says: “You could try something else”.
I sent my old best friend the link to Witty a month ago, and she took 10 days to respond. All she said was "what website is that?". I assume she didn't bother to take a look at it. I told her, and explained it a bit, and she said "oh, okay". 9 days later, I replied saying "So I guess you aren't interested?". Now it's been two weeks, and she hasn't replied. For someone who's on her phone all the time, she sure takes a long time to reply. I guess I now know where I am on her list of priorities.
It used to be fun to jokingly reply ya mama when my mom asked from another room who was in the kitchen or teased me about anything and now it's not fun to say it nor I imagine is it easy for her to hear it. It just reminds us both that my grandmom, her mom, isn't here anymore. When I said it in the past it was silly but it was also a nice reminder that she was alive, well, and my mom could jokingly threaten to tell her that I was talking bad about her. Talking about her isn't a taboo in the house now, of course, we mention her all the time. But in this instance, it feels wrong. I've avoided using the phrase at all for the last two months, but today it slipped out, and there was silence afterwards. I felt bad that I'd said it aloud, and my mom had nothing to retort. She was in another room, and I could picture her sitting there letting my words hit her.... God, how I wish there was any truth left to it. That any little noise or minor mishap really was ''ya mama''.
It has been said that time heals all wounds. I don't agree. The wounds remain. Time - the mind, protecting its sanity - covers them with some scar tissue and the pain lessens, but it is never gone. -Rose Kennedy