I know that she has a lot of stories Some she chooses to share and some she keeps hidden away in the depths of her mind She’s a natural introvert But there’s more to it than that Sometimes it seems like she doesn’t want anyone to know her at all
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yourcool posted a quote
February 23, 2018 1:37pm UTC
I haven't been on here in a little over a year. So many things are different since 2016. I've graduated college, first in the family. I still can't believe I'm not a college student anymore and that I'm a college graduate. I've really grown as a person. I used to love going out and drink with friends - now I live for the nights I get to spend with my dogs. I used to hate myself and I'm not a HUGE fan still but I'm getting there. But I don't think anyone ever really is 100% okay with themselves at all moments. And that's okay. I've bought my grandfather his first puppy in over 30 years. He loves her more than most things. The first month he had her, I didn't see a moment where he wasn't smiling. I'm 23 - which is wild. I turn 24 in November. Which is even crazier. I started going on this when I was 15. I've almost had this account for 10 years. It's weird to look back at quotes I made, more funny but others more personal. It's awful to know how much pain I used to be in. But it's amazing to see how far I have come. I didn't even know if I'd make it to 20, let alone 23. I never was suicidal but I really hated my life, for whatever reason. Now I just love being alive. For my mom, for my grandparents, for my dogs and cats. For myself. I'm still scared of what's to come but I think that's what keeps me motivated. I don't know, Witty was my safe haven growing up. It's what helped me get through a lot of things and I'm glad I had this website. I used to play in softball tournaments on the weekends and come home after those wins and losses and post quotes. I was so excited to post quotes - sometimes I even limited myself to only 10 a day when in reality I would wanna post like 30. I'm only 23 years old. I'm a recent graduate of college. I still can't believe I made it. I'm not always fully okay but I still am here and I'm glad I'm here. I've got a long way to go to where I want to be but I have that faith that I'll make it. Never lose hope in yourself. Show the world what they didn't think you could do. Hang in there and just know if you aren't okay now, you will be. It may take years like it took me, but you'll get there. It's so worth the wait. Live your best life.
Miluiel* posted a quote
January 13, 2017 3:21pm UTC
Everything ends or dies or gets taken away Fxck bittersweet And me Until I forget about the trains and stuff like that You shouldn't be hearing this I shouldn't be saying it But to hell with me and all my wanderlust This is all just feelings gushing right? Stream of consciousness Don't take it personally But I want to get out with you t.s., explicit
Miluiel* posted a quote
January 3, 2017 8:54pm UTC
five things i learned about myself last year 1. i am not impatient. i am restless. 2. i'm not a people pleaser. 3. practicing reckless optimism is not nearly as hard as knowing when to let it go. 4. the third cigarette is the hardest to light. 5. i can cry. i just have to let myself.
justmeida posted a quote
October 13, 2016 12:40pm UTC
/watch?v=x6QZn9xiuOE ;]] ~ J U S T M E L D A ~ HelloOo! My name is here on , just in case that you didn't see it up there ^ ;o (And yes, you can call my presentation Fifty Shades Of Grey if you want to ;)) Euumm.. I don't really have that hey-I-can-put-my-hole-lifestory-into-500-letters ability. My mom maybe accidentally threw me into a wall when I was a baby or something.. :s Anyway xD.. Let's move on! I love animals, and when I say love, i mean LOOOOOVE. And when I say animals, I mean AAALL ANIMALS. Cats, dogs, frogs, sloths, zebras, ants, slugs, you name it! You can probably say that I'm the creepy version of Snow White, if you take away the fact that she's a princess, she lives with 7 tiny dwarfs.. (My friends aren't that short xo.. Or only my darling silver c;) aand that I'm not some kind of badger-whisper and force them to bake me a pie (That would be quite awesome though..) I'm also a very big fan of applepie without apples.
yourcool posted a quote
October 13, 2016 5:52am UTC
June 10, 2016. Minnie Mouse. Unlike the "real" Minnie Mouse, you were the best dog I ever had. My childhood ended when I watched the life go out of your eyes. Most people can't watch their dog die. I wasn't leaving you in those last moments. You were there for me for everything. I was going to be there to end your pain. It's silly to miss a dog so much. But you knew dad. And not many people knew him. I got you when I was 5 years old. I had you for 16 years. I'm getting a Minnie Mouse tattooed on my leg for you. Hakuna Matata, Minnie. We love you so much.
yourcool posted a quote
October 13, 2016 5:49am UTC
October 6, 2002. 14 years and a week ago. That's the day you died. The day some man in an eighteen-wheeler decided to be careless. The day a woman lost her husband. The day a father lost their son. The day a brother and sister lost their brother. The day newphews and neices lost their uncle. The day two parent-in-laws lost their only son-in-law. The day two daughters lost their father. I carry a picture of you and me in my purse. It has been there since I've bought that purse. It has been in backpacks and wallets before that. You may not be here, but you are always with me. I'll always be mad at the man who killed you. But I can't help but hope that he can live with what he did. He also had everything we lost. I couldn't live with myself knowing that he didn't live his life fully after killing you. I know he didn't do it on purpose. We had to put down Minnie a few months back. I like to think you met her at the gates. If they do exist. And I'm hoping they do. 14 years doesn't change the fact that I'll ever forget the day I was told you weren't coming home. Even Minnie was standing there with us on that lawn. I will forever be thankful my last words to you were "I love you." I will forever be thankful that I got to hug you goodbye before we lef the house. I don't know how I got so lucky, thinking about it. Luckily but unlucky. I'll take what I got. It's better than most. Your tattoo will be on me forever. You will be with me forever. I will tell my future husband all about you. I will tell your grandchildren how great of a man you were. I love you.
Miluiel* posted a quote
September 1, 2016 4:44pm UTC
august favorites ice cream cake. kt. skinny jeans. weddings. iced tea. woe is me. sleepovers. vaping. anticipation. driving at night. striped socks. super smash bros. kudos. turning coworkers into friends. bufferingbook.com. biking. black nail polish. getting lost. asking the waiter for more free bread. expo markers and a white board. audrey. sugar skulls. storage trunks. halloween. pancakes. classical guitar. emperor's new groove. two-part inventions. morning air. laced fingers. waffle cones. brandon flowers. piggy-back rides. glitter. don't stop believing.
Miluiel* posted a quote
August 12, 2016 10:26pm UTC
1:03am every facet of my head hurts--my mind, my jaw, my ears, my eyes are on fire. my stomach is churning. i'm hunched over, sitting on a chair in my kitchen, staring at the medicine cabinet. i just want it to stop. 1:47am i am holding a bottle of pills. my hand is shaking, causing the capsules to rattle. my face is contorted, my eyebrows are permanently furrowed. the fan above me creates a buzzing noise that blocks out any voice of reason i could be hearing. 2:28am the bottle is on the floor, the cap is broken off. all the pills are gone. my shaking has gotten worse. i've started sweating, and drops of it sting my eyes. they blur my vision. i don't care. i feel like i'm going to lose everything i've eaten today. i pound my fist on my thigh, and the bruises that are already there scream. i grit my teeth. 3:52am my jaw aches worse than ever. my abdomen is sore. i'm gasping curses on myself. i've thrown up four times. i might pass out if i do it again. there was a time i would've died rather than vomit. i wish i was dead. wasn't that the whole point? 5:00am i am asleep on the bathroom floor. my toothbrush is laying on the side of the sink, next to an open tube of toothpaste. my dreams are black. 5:57am i cough myself awake. my skin looks dead. my toes are numb. my throat is raw. i take a shallow breath and stand up. my legs are wobbly. my body aches from sleeping on the hard tile. i force myself to take a shower. i try not to look at myself in the mirror. 6:30am my back is against my matress. judy garland is playing from my ipod. her voice soothes me. i unclench my fists. i will be okay. i will be okay. i will be okay.
july favorites travel. twilight princess. old friends. woodchips. baby grands. backpacks. first hugs. long-awaited meetings. lemonade. my little pony. candle light. jean jackets. popcorn. lilo and stitch. smash mouth. brutal honesty. sleeping in. cotton candy sunsets. flowers. alex vause. insomnia-induced confessions. converse. calling kaete. hanging upsidedown off my bed. planning skype dates. klondike bars. dollar tree. grandparents. over-sized t-shirts. jordan almonds. btvs. headphones. the pink elephant. forest roads. city bridges. skipping stones. front pikes. baseball. patience. apologies.
i miss my confidence as a little girl. i miss being able to be myself around the boys i had crushes on without fear. i miss being able to openly admit that i liked them. then along came the anxiety and the rude, gross boys who weren't worth it. those two problems mixed together were the perfect concoction of triggers that ruined my self esteem. i hate hearing my heart beat through my chest when i'm around that special boy because i pray so badly not to fnck up, i hate not being my friendly self and acting aggressive and standoffish so they don't get the idea that i like them. i hate not being able to make eye contact, to ask them simple questions, to feel my stomach churn like crazy when i merely hear them mention another girl's name, i hate when my friends try to help me out by asking him how he feels about me and literally feeling like vomiting because i was deceived into thinking the answer was always going to be bad, all because my anxiety overpowered me and tried to let my past become my future. i hate crying pools of tears when i find out they don't feel the same and producing pools of sweat the next day when i have to see them and avoid eye contact with them and pretend my whole body isn't weak and shaky and my soul hasn't rotted and he's looking at me differently because he knows about my feelings and i'm left embarrassed, degraded, vulnerable and belittled, all because i admired someone, all because he had pretty eyes or because he was funny or because he was really good at baseball and i didn't measure up to his standards and due to the voices at school i thought i was the ugliest thing in the world and i'd never have a boy want me. i hate continuing to feel so insecure when i find out a boy does like me and feeling like it's all a sick joke and once he sees the real side of me he'll leave due to several past experiences that left me aching for months, even years. i hate having that feeling in my stomach when they text back too late or give one word responses or i see him with another girl, feeling like i have no control, there's never a good side because i'm either overthinking and making them feel bad for me or they're making me feel bad and i'm being overdramatic, all because i was told so many times that i was ugly, that i wasn't worth it, that i'd never find a boy who i liked and liked me too. but i have to overcome, because my faith is my fortune. if i keep focusing on my past i'll get more of it. i have to put myself out there and not be afraid, and remind myself that if things don't work out it isn't my fault. i am still strong, smart and beautiful no matter what that boy thinks, and as a bonus, i am brave for going against traditional gender roles and going after what i want instead of just waiting around for it. it won't be easy and some of these scars will never fade, but i'll always be growing.
i promise to be good to you. i could never hate you. you are not toxic. please listen to me. you are the sun. you are the moon. you are the stars, wrapped into human form. and i am not much. but i prommise to be good to you. i could never hate you. you are not toxic. please listen to me.
you deserved the universe. you deserved it all. your name was always caught in my throat. now it is flowing freely off my tongue, and i wish you could hear just how often. but that would change everything. i always wanted to know you. dare i say i do? my ears itch for your voice to say i can come in. i don't want to intrude. i don't want to intrude. i don't want to intrude. but i want to u n d e r s t a n d. stranger is such a harsh word. i think i'm in love. ((everyone here leaves so quickly, i hope you linger.)) i should have told you back then. but you deserve the universe. you deserve it all. -T.s., friends come and go
june favorites comic strips. motorcycles. haikyuu!!. willow. camper mail. twitter talks with amenah. amenah. amenah. trash punk. scene kids. spine kisses. scary movies. oh wonder. audio books. short hair. late night showers. three am. sunglasses. wizard of oz. slushies. orange juice. running away from eliza in target. holding hands. my sisters. star wars. geometric tattoos. trucks. blaring music out open windows. bonfires. vocal layering. bedtime stories. christina grimmie. power thighs. taking my friends on dates. care packages. galaxy purple. the neighbor's cat. waffle cones. old sneakers. pride.