Best Oops Quotes Today

kristabff
posted a quote
June 6, 2013 2:54pm UTC

Oops I accidentally
discovered the Internet and kissed my social life goodbye what do I do now

👍 this is good · read the comments · 263 points

*Elena;~ ♥*
posted a quote
October 8, 2013 7:38pm UTC

I get bloody noses a lot and I can usually feel it
about 30 seconds before it starts dripping. Today
in class my nose started to bleed. But right before,
I turned to this very religious boy who sits next to
me and whispered “Hail satan” as my nose started
to drip. He freaked out and fell back and hit his head.
He had to go home for the rest of the day.

👍 this is good · read the comments · 261 points

Cammie
posted a quote
May 12, 2013 1:01pm UTC

Do not make inside jokes with me..
because i will bring it up 17 times a day.

👍 this is good · read the comments · 247 points

Cammie
posted a quote
May 26, 2013 7:21pm UTC

“why”
“because i said so”
good one mom you should be a lawyer

👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 239 points

kristabff
posted a quote
June 14, 2013 4:03pm UTC

Me: ~tries to catch a grenade for you~
Me: ~misses~
Grenade: ~lands on the ground and explodes, ki.l.ling everyone within a 15 meter radius~

👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 169 points

Bec*
posted a quote
March 7, 2013 2:51am UTC

I'm a girl... don't touch my hair, face, phone, boyfriend. Boyfriend? Oops I meant Wifi.

👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 156 points

Cammie
posted a quote
May 11, 2013 9:42pm UTC

Did you know that
a software company buried a $1,000 prize deep in the Terms of Service to see if anyone would actually read it. After 5 months and over 3,000 sales, someone finally asked about the prize.

👍 this is good · read the comments · 147 points

seafoam*
posted a quote
August 8, 2013 12:14am UTC

Sister: Oh my gosh, Kim Stoppable is on TV!.
Kim Stoppable.
Kim Stoppable.
Kim Stoppable.
KIM STOPPABLE.
Did she just- did she really just-

👍 this is good · read the comments · 162 points

Cammie
posted a quote
April 23, 2013 8:08pm UTC

If people could hear the next five seconds after we hit end on a call, we would have no friends.

👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 144 points

Cammie
posted a quote
April 14, 2013 3:23pm UTC

Texting Mom:
Mom:Hi Sweetie, do your (.)(.) still hurt from the optition?
Me: Um.. Mom.. check what you just sent me.
Mom: What? It means eye, right? I saw it on your brothers phone texting his gf, it said 'I love looking at your beautiful (.)(.)
Me: No Mom. It doesn't.
Mom:...

👍 this is good · read the comments · 137 points

goawayanthony*
posted a quote
October 13, 2013 9:50pm UTC

Accidentally forgetting your headphones at home is like accidentally leaving your first-born child at the gates of hell.

👍 this is good · read the comments · 125 points

Cammie
posted a quote
May 19, 2013 1:28pm UTC

If you think everyone loves you then you are wrong.
Remember there is a Grumpy Cat who hates you.

👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 123 points

Hale_Storm18
posted a quote
September 17, 2013 9:46pm UTC

I don't get what the big deal about a girl stuffing her bra or wearing a push up bra is. Like, wow. A girl is unhappy with her appearance so she does something to change it. What a foreign concept. I've never heard of something like that before.

👍 this is good · read the comments · 116 points

Cammie
posted a quote
May 19, 2013 7:37pm UTC

Amanda Bynes has lost it.
Court dismissed, bring in the dancing lobsters.

👍 this is good · read the comments · 118 points

the1975*
posted a quote
November 7, 2013 6:59pm UTC

how am i supposed to like your personality when i don't even like your eyebrows

👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 112 points

elephants_are_cool*
posted a quote
November 25, 2013 4:05pm UTC

Didn't have internet on my phone for the past few hours. I graduated, got married, lost some weight, read 15 books & showered.

👍 this is good · read the comments · 104 points

Cammie
posted a quote
April 8, 2013 4:17pm UTC

You know what's depressing?
When your idol doesn't know you exsist. I mean they mean to world to us but, they have no idea we're alive, and they're living their life perfectly fine without you.

👍 this is good · read the comments · 116 points

*Elena;~ ♥*
posted a quote
September 12, 2013 5:37pm UTC

I once recorded myself singing
and then when I listened to it I didn't talk for 3 days straight

👍 this is good · read the comments · 96 points

Cammie
posted a quote
May 5, 2013 8:29pm UTC

If you go to my school
there is a 100% chance you're a peasent.

👍 this is good · read the comments · 91 points

Cammie
posted a quote
April 23, 2013 8:01pm UTC

I listen to the first 30-45 seconds of a butt dial like I'm an FBI agent in a surveillance van.

👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 89 points

Witty Profiles

Best Oops Quotes Today