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Lifealert Quotes

  1. britany* britany*
    posted a quote
    December 3, 2013 8:10pm UTC
    *Life Alert Commercial*
    Old Lady: I tried to twerk and i fell on the floor
    Old Lady: I dropped all my thun thun thuns

  2. writtenrain* writtenrain*
    posted a quote
    November 24, 2013 3:36pm UTC
    So the other day my friend and I
    were at the library and sitting by the magazine section. This elderly man walked over
    to grab a magazine and when he saw us he just said "I have fallen and I cannot get up"
    and then he legitimately just walked away and I don't think I have ever laughed so hard.

  3. SundayWakeUp SundayWakeUp
    posted a quote
    June 29, 2013 8:15pm UTC
    help I've fallen into japanese fashion and I cant get up
    no seriously I cant afford this help

  4. RealGrandpaWitty RealGrandpaWitty
    posted a quote
    May 25, 2013 2:10pm UTC
    Hey babe, you better call life alert
    because I've fallen for you and I can't get up.

  5. CharliesTheName CharliesTheName
    posted a quote
    March 10, 2013 7:52pm UTC
    I would pay actual money
    if I saw someone fall, break there hip, and only say "help, I've fallen and I can't get up"

  6. CaitlinAtTheDisco* CaitlinAtTheDisco*
    posted a quote
    March 1, 2013 10:30pm UTC
    I'd find Life Alert commericals more entertaining
    if they played the song 'Let The Bodies Hit The Floor'
    nmq/nmf

  7. CaitlinAtTheDisco* CaitlinAtTheDisco*
    posted a quote
    February 21, 2013 9:31pm UTC
    Me: *falls*
    Me: *breaks life alert button in process*

:)

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