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Best Instagram Quotes This Month

  1. CaitlinAtTheDisco* CaitlinAtTheDisco*
    posted a quote
    April 4, 2013 7:32pm UTC
    Today,
    I got my first instagram hate.
    You wanna know what I woke up to?
    'kill yourself'
    And you know what I did?
    I laughed and ate a pretzel

  2. BrunetteBiitch BrunetteBiitch
    posted a quote
    April 6, 2013 4:19pm UTC
    So I was looking through comments on this popular instagram page today
    and I saw this:
    "Hello, I am currently 9 years old and I want to become a potato. I know there are a million people out there just like me, but I promise you I'm different. On December 14, I'm moving to Lays; home of the greatest potatoes around. I've already cut off both my arms, and now roll on my stomach everywhere I go as training. I may not be a potato yet, but I promise if you give me a chance and the support I need, I will become the greatest potato ever. I have a dandy dandy human companion to guide me through this harsh journey and type this up for me. Thank you."
    Please, whoever and where ever you are, come and join witty.

  3. ThatsSoMeee ThatsSoMeee
    posted a quote
    May 27, 2013 2:02pm UTC
    could you imagine
    if facebook and instagram got like a “seen by” note
    next to your photos and then you’d know who didn’t like your photo.
    I think I’d start hating people more
    if that happened.

  4. kristabff kristabff
    posted a quote
    September 14, 2013 8:33pm UTC
    This kid in my grade posted
    a picture of his mcdonald's cup with two straws on Instgram and he wrote:
    "McDonalds Logic: gives you two straws when you order one drink"
    and this other kid wrote underneath that caption:
    "McDonalds Logic: gives you two chins when you order one Big Mac"
    and i'm dEAD HOLY CRAP HAHA

  5. kissofdeathx_x kissofdeathx_x
    posted a quote
    May 17, 2013 6:25pm UTC
    If a person laughs too much, even at stupid things, they're lonely deep inside.. If a person sleeps a lot, they are sad.. If a person speaks less, but speaks fast, they keep secrets.. If someone can't cry, they're weak.. If someone eats in an abnormal manner, they're tense.. If someone cries on little things, they're innocent & soft-hearted. If someone becomes angry over silly or pretty (small) things, it means they need love..
    Try to understand people.

  6. roseth0rn roseth0rn
    posted a quote
    February 19, 2013 3:55pm UTC
    dwayne johnson, paper, scissors

  7. Jessica♥* Jessica♥*
    posted a quote
    February 23, 2013 9:31pm UTC
    *on the phone*
    friend: Well, I'm really tired so I'm gonna go to bed. Goodnight.
    *30 minutes later*
    friend: *posts facebook status, posts instagram photo, retweets 20 tweets, goes to the mall, cooks a gourmet dinner, buys the mall, builds an amusement park, discovers new element, opens a zoo, paints house pink, marries an octopus, has ten kids, figures out the string theory, and starts a clothing line*

  8. breezy_mac breezy_mac
    posted a quote
    August 21, 2013 7:33am UTC
    if you like someone tell them
    ... or stalk them on every social network.

  9. truelove1018 truelove1018
    posted a quote
    May 7, 2013 9:14pm UTC
    *Slam dunks your opinion into the trash*

  10. Hale_Storm18 Hale_Storm18
    posted a quote
    September 4, 2013 9:34pm UTC
     
    if someone treats you like crap, just remember, there is something wrong with them. not you. normal people don't go around destroying other human beings. jkrgbtjkbgh

  11. dolph* dolph*
    posted a quote
    July 26, 2013 1:18pm UTC
    *grandad voice* you kids with your instant graham

  12. kristabff kristabff
    posted a quote
    February 6, 2013 6:17pm UTC
    Admit it
    when something bad/unexpected happens you automatically mouth "sh/t"

  13. kristabff kristabff
    posted a quote
    March 29, 2013 10:32am UTC
    I can never take a picture of my food
    for instagram because I always end up turning into Pacman and eating my whole plate within 0.0034 seconds before i even whip my phone out.

  14. Hale_Storm18 Hale_Storm18
    posted a quote
    March 19, 2013 11:10am UTC
    Have you ever taken a selfie and when you first look at it you think,
    "Wow. I'm hot." and then, like, a minute later you look carefully at everything on your face and you realize you're the ugliest person to ever inhabit the planet?

  15. kristabff kristabff
    posted a quote
    February 9, 2013 3:22pm UTC
    Picking up our kids from school in the future
    Me: yo shawty time to go
    Child: mom, not this again...
    Me: aye stop hatin! yolo
    Child: mom, stop. you're embarrasing me.
    Me: swaggie.

  16. *crybaby* *crybaby*
    posted a quote
    January 1, 2014 8:32pm UTC
    shopping for clothes is only fun when you're rich and skinny

  17. breezy_mac breezy_mac
    posted a quote
    June 11, 2013 2:55am UTC
    I want to get a job at starbucks
    so I can spell everyone's names wrong so they can't instagram their cups.

  18. kristabff kristabff
    posted a quote
    February 9, 2013 3:08pm UTC
    Moms will call you for anything.
    Mom: HONEYYYYYYYY COME HERE PLEASE
    Me: *on other side of house* WHATT
    Mom: GET ME THE TV REMOTE

  19. Hale_Storm18 Hale_Storm18
    posted a quote
    September 27, 2013 9:20pm UTC
    hush little baby
    don't you cry
    don't cut your arms
    don't say goodbye
    put down that razor
    put down that light
    it might be hard
    but you'll win this fight

  20. Hale_Storm18 Hale_Storm18
    posted a quote
    January 7, 2014 4:04pm UTC
    me: *gets over 50 likes on a selfie*
    me: they like me! they really like me!

:)

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