confessions (because why the hell not)
i. Sometimes when I'm giving out compliments and checking in excessively, it's because I'm feeling particularly low. My praise and concern for others is never insincere, no; I just don't know if I do this because the loving attention I give people is exactly what I want from them during those times of sadness and self-hatred, or because it just makes me feel so great to make others happy that I forget temporarily how awful I feel about myself (perhaps both).
ii. I'm often restless and have strange nervous habits, including relentlessly, aimlessly pacing, wringing my hands, and rocking slightly in the seat I'm sitting in.
iii. I'm bad at concealing my emotions, but it isn't really as if I try to.
iv. I'm eternally torn between my childish and mature side.
v. I'm hard on myself and on many occasions have managed to bring myself to the point of tears or nauseation. I feel that nothing I do or say is worth anything and I'm just this talentless, inadequate mess and it hurts.
vi. I'm usually terribly clingy or terribly distant with people in my life, and there's seldom an area of grey.