~You were my sky. ~I looked forward to every morning and night because of you. ~For no reason...~You didnt keep me calm...~You didn't love me like you said you did..~You didnt do anything.~You loved me but you didn't know how to show it...~I guess your way of loving me was by hurting me.~Those things you said and did...~I used to be so happy because im at peace when i look up at the literal sky~Now when i look up, all i want to do is cry. ~No lie, sometimes i want to die because i let myself give in~You were my sky...~But now i kind of want you to burn in hell, but i know I'll see you there when im gone.
How did this happen? What have I done? I was so happy with him He was everything I have ever wanted Then I ruined it All because of a stupid little thing How could I have let the fear control me? Always putting myself down and believing I'm not good enough Letting the toxic thoughts come to the surface I know I shouldn't I know that I should have dismissed them Why must I sabotage myself? Why can't I let myself be happy? Why can't I believe that I am good enough to be loved? I ruined my happiness I hurt him so bad I wish I could take the pain from you I wish I could take back what I did All I want is you My reason to smile and laugh Why do we realize too late that were in love? Why does it take losing them to make you realize how much you need him? I want the touch of your hands on me, I want your lips on mine I just want your attention, your gaze on me, your arms around me I want you I need you I am so lost without you I promise I'll be yours, forever I promise I won't leave, not until you don't want me Without you, I am a robot Moving through time, mechanically, getting up only because I must Going through the motions, putting on a fake smile Numb, empty, and emotionless Everything in me is screaming to give up But I can't let go of the hope that there might be a chance If you could find it in your heart to forgive me, I promise I'll never hurt you again I promise I'll let go of the fear and insecurities I promise I'll stop letting it control me Please, my love, take me back I might be stupid, insecure and a bit crazy But you'll never find anyone else who's in love with you as much as me
they say the world is a hard place, but no one mentions the gut wrenching, soul crushing, heart breaking pain it is to survive growing up. They don’t talk about how childhood is just a word now, or when it became such a fight and you have to be like the ferrous iron that flows through your veins to reach adulthood unscathed. Your first fight, your first heartbreak, your first betrayal, your first identity crisis, your first addiction. People are always talking about how children these days are so very resilient. They shouldn’t have to be. When did we start teaching our children that growing up is having to choose thousands of ways of breaking yourself in two?
The girl he loves is midnight, like the blue of the sea cradled by the moonlight. The girl he loves is verdant, the very green of the hill kissed by the summer delight. The girl he loves is coral, as pink as the roses that grow in his mother's garden. The girl he loves is crimson, red like the autumn leaves that lay abandoned. The girl he loves I can never be Because he's allergic to violets, And violets are too much like me.
PandaPants posted a quote
January 25, 2016 1:19am EST
I hate how I'm never pretty enough Never strong enough Never good enough I hate how I lack that side of me The one you desire me to be, I'm trying, can't you see? I hate how I crave for you, I love you, I'd do anything for you. I hate how It's you I cry for, it's you I try for, it's you I lie for. I hate how I no longer see true, I no longer breathe true, & it's all because of you. -Tiff♥ Dang, my poetry lately.. damn, my feels are going all kinds of ways.
Heartache is good. Accept it joyously. Allow it, don’t repress it. The natural tendency of the mind is to repress anything that is painful. By repressing it you will destroy something that is growing. The heart is meant to be broken. Its purpose is to melt into tears and and evaporate. When the heart has evaporated exactly in the same place where the heart was, you come to know the deeper heart.
PandaPants posted a quote
December 21, 2015 1:16am EST
Each night I'm left pondering these thoughts Life fading before my eyes as my heart slowly rots I've lost faith in the youth The same youth that showed me the truth I don't belong here, I've been told enough. Holding on has become far more tough. As I wonder, with thoughts clouding my mind. The light inside this darkness is becoming harder to find. I'm stranded here, there is no escape. Forever stuck in this messed up place. -Tiff♥
PandaPants posted a quote
November 20, 2015 12:20pm EST
Life is a book. A new page every day. & no matter how adjusted I get to these pages. It never ceases to amaze me on the next page. How quickly life can change in a single day. How fast things can take a turn for the worst or for the better. Never knowing if the next page is your last. Living life in suspense. Dying to live yet we're living to die.