If Taylor and Harry were still together and I saw them: Taylor and Harry: *making out* Me: *gasp* Taylor and Harry: *look at me* Me: You're that guy from that Pepsi commercial and you're all like "and I'm Herreh!" I love that commercial! Harry: Err, thanks. Me: And you! You're the one that dated Joe Jonas and Lucas Till! Taylor: *nods and smiles* Me: And Taylor Lautner! Oh, and John Mayer and Jake Gyllenhaal!! Taylor: *stands there awkwardly* Me: Oh! And that guy from Glee, umm, Cory Montieth! OHH and Zac Efron! And Eddie Redmayne! Taylor: Uh... Me: Oh, and I can't forget Connor Kennedy!! ...Dang, that's a lot of guys... *looks at Harry* Good luck, bro. Not meant to offend either swifties or directioners. just thought it was funny. Follow me and I'll follow back, duh.
Niall Horan: I hate it when girls act stupid because they think it's cute. Intelligence is attractive. Me: One particle of unobtanium has a nuclear reaction with a flux capacitor, carry the two, change it's atomic isotope into a raioactive spider. follow for a follow.
Me: Sometimes I just want to drag Harry into an empty hotel room, throw him down on a bed, straddle his thighs, rip his shirt off and MAKE HIM EXPLAIN EVERY DANG ONE OF HIS TATTOOS BECAUSE I CAN'T HANDLE THE SUSPENSE. Harry: Well... I thought we were going somewhere else there... follow for a follow
One Direction as principles scolding a student: Niall: Never do that again! Do you understand how ba-- *lunch bell rings* GET OUTTA THE WAY! *pushes kid over and runs to cafeteria* Harry: So basically, erm... so... like, you can't... do that... Zayn: You need to keep your hands and feet inside the roller coaster that is life next time, okay? Liam: Okay, I know you made a woopsy, but be good next time. Oh my, that was so harsh! I'm sorry! You know what? Here's a lollipop. And a sticker. And a golden star sticker for you! Run along now, precious little honey bunches of oats. Louis: Do you even know who I am? Huh?? And you're gonna talk back to me!? Uh, not in my house, b/tch. Not in my house.
One Direction Insults: Louis: Boys with as/es like mine don't talk to girls with faces like yours. Harry: I care about you like Niall cares about childbirth. Niall: I can make your girl scream louder just by clicking the follow button. Zayn: Your face is as ugly as mine is sexy. Liam: I know you are but what am I!!
How Andy and Liam Became Friends: Andy: Hey what's up, my name's Andy. Liam: Andy?? Like the character from Toy Story!? Andy: Uh.. yeah? Liam: .... Andy: ...... Liam: We're best friends. Andy: Wha-- Liam: END OF DISCUSSION WE ARE GOING TO BE BFFS FOREVER. Andy: Dude okay, calm down. Liam: YOU GOT A FRIEND IN ME! follow for a follow.
What One Direction sings in the shower: Liam: Sunshine, lollipops, rainbows everywhere! Zayn: I'm sexy and I know it! Harry: It's getting hot in here, so take off all your clothes! Louis: G-L-A-M-O-R-O-U-S, yeeeaaaaah! Niall: Ba da da da da, I'm lovin' it!! follow for a follow. <3
IF NIALL REPLACED HARRY IN THE PEPSI COMMERCIAL: Drew: Com on kid, just give me the Pepsi. Niall: Heck naw, it's mine! I saw it first! Drew: Kid, I'm Drew Brees. Niall: Niall don't care. You ain't touchin' my Pepsi! Drew: ....Can't we at least share it? Niall: NIALL HORAN DOESN'T SHARE!!! Besides, it's too late. You can have the can. Drew: What?! How did you drink that whole thing!? I've been talking to you this whole time! Niall: NIALLER LIKE A PUMA!!!
Zayn: Tell me I'm a screwed up mess. Me: You're a screwed up mess. Zayn: that I never listen, listen. Me: You never listen... uh.. listen... Zayn: Tell me you don't want my kiss. Me: NOW HOLD THE F//K UP. FOLLOW FOR A FOLLOW.
HOW I BECAME A DIRECTIONER Phase 1: Oh, these guys are cute. Hm, looks like their in a band from the UK. I should look them up... Phase 2: Wow, this song is like.. amazing. More! Phase 3: I just spent all night listening to all of their songs... now what..? Phase 4: Ooooo, what's this?? Video diaries? Should be interesting. *Later* God, it's getting late.. Oh well. Next video. Phase 5: Oh my god, they're all so cute and adorable and funny! Louis so silly, Harry is sexy, Zayn's mysterious, Niall's adorable and Liam is so sweet!! It should be illegal to be that attractive!!! Phase 6: I need to follow ALL the fan blogs!!! Twitter: Follow the boys. Facebook: Like fan pages. Tumblr: More fan pages. Youtube: Subscribe to OneDirectionVevo. Phase 7: WHY MUST YOU BE SO FAR AWAY? Sweet Jesus, I need you all in my life! How can you be so talented, funny, and good looking!? Impossible!! Forget you and your amazing voices!!! I'm sorry, come back!!!! Phase 8: MY WHOLE LIFE HAS BECOME CENTERED AROUND 5 BOYS I'VE NEVER MET. ...I regret nothing. follow for a follow.