Hahah Quotes

Kik me!!!*
posted a quote
September 1, 2015 2:47pm UTC

Teacher: Can you please tell the class why you're so late?
Me: Someone told me to go to hell
Me: Couldn't find it at first
Me: But now I'm here

👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 13 points

Chelseaa.✌*
posted a quote
October 4, 2014 7:00pm UTC

I swear there's not enough cover up in the world to hide all my freckles.

👍 this is good · read the comments · 8 points

Tilly*
posted a quote
May 31, 2014 4:38pm UTC

~MORNING S.E.X~
She was standing in the kitchen, preparing the usual
soft boiled eggs and toast for breakfast, wearing only the T-shirt
that she usually slept in.
As he walked in, almost awake, she turned to him and said softly,
"You've got to make love to me this very moment!"
His eyes lit up and he thought,
"I am either still dreaming or this is going to be my lucky day!"
Not wanting to loose the moment, he embraced her and he gave her
is all;right there on the kitchen table.
Afterwards she said, "thanks," and returned to the stove,
her T-shirt still around her neck.
Happy, but a bit puzzled, he asked,
"What was that all about?"
She explained, "the egg timer's broken."

👍 this is good · read the comments · 12 points

SuperNovaChic
posted a quote
May 1, 2014 10:42am UTC

Sorry, I didn't recognize you without your Instagram filter. XD

👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 32 points

olives
posted a quote
April 13, 2014 12:29am UTC

I'm better at keeping other people's secrets
than my own

👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 6 points

SkittlesGirl
posted a quote
March 20, 2014 9:54am UTC

When life gives you lemons, make orange juice and leave the world wondering how you did it.

👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 5 points

SuperNovaChic
posted a quote
March 10, 2014 11:05am UTC

Me: Titanic's on.
My dad: Hmm, that's the one that always gives me that sinking feeling.
^So, this is where I get my pun abilities from. XD

👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 20 points

Forever His*
posted a quote
March 8, 2014 2:18am UTC

I Love That Kid that Argues With The Teacher, Entertains The Whole Class! ;D

👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 3 points

SuperNovaChic
posted a quote
March 3, 2014 9:37am UTC

I think that people in horror movies must live in an alternate universe where horror movies don't exist.

👍 this is good · read the comments · 49 points

Deep breaths, my love*
posted a quote
February 4, 2014 4:06pm UTC

I hate to see you leave but i love to watch you go (Hint hint c; )

👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 2 points

ithinkyoureperfectluv
posted a quote
January 31, 2014 7:49am UTC

Friendship is like pis.sing your pants
Everyone can see it but only you can feel the warmth
Thank you for being the pi.ss in my pants

👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 5 points

Kaleidoscope Eyed*
posted a quote
January 21, 2014 10:07pm UTC

Do you know what my shirt is made of? Girlfriend material.

👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 3 points

Infinity on high*
posted a quote
January 7, 2014 11:16pm UTC

one day i am going to buy a parrot and teach it to screach
'help, i've beEN TURNED INTO A PARROT'

👍 this is good · read the comments · 18 points

Infinity on high*
posted a quote
December 18, 2013 4:58am UTC

Frozen
Olaf: *melting by the fireplace because he's a snowman*
Anna: Olaf! You're melting
Olaf: Some people are worth melting for...
Anna: *smiles*
Olaf: Just not right now.

👍 this is good · read the comments · 28 points