Best Ew Quotes Today

kristabff
posted a quote
April 12, 2013 5:11pm UTC

What if this happened.
Girl: ~does math homework in class~
Girl: Omg i can't these problems!!
Girl: It's sO HARD I CANT OMGG
Girl: ~runs away crying in frustration~
Teacher: What just happened miss
Girls Friend: She ran away from her problems

👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 456 points

kristabff
posted a quote
May 17, 2013 5:30pm UTC

And as I watch the tears roll down your cheeks,
I laugh because i hate you.

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BlackButterflies
posted a quote
August 20, 2013 1:07am UTC

teacher: "you kids need to stand in the sun and get some vitamin D in you!"
eoghan: *shrieks and runs towards a distant patch of sunlight* "I WANT THE D!"
teacher: "what's he doing?"
me: "...he's chasin' down the D, ma'am"
eoghan: "SWEET JESUS THAT D IS AMAZING!"
eoghan: "I LOVE THE FEELING OF D ON MY FACE"
teacher: "what."
eoghan: *shrieks again and runs inside* "TOO MUCH D, TOO MUCH D!"

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kristabff
posted a quote
June 13, 2013 1:43pm UTC

My relationship with my boyfriend
is like the square root of -1. It doesn't exist.

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happiest*
posted a quote
October 29, 2013 2:43pm UTC

THE WORST KIND OF PEOPLE IN THIS WORLD ARE THE PEOPLE WHO NOTICE WHEN YOU’RE EMBARRASSED AND BLURT OUT “YOU’RE BLUSHING” LIKE YES IM EMBARRASSED THANK YOU FOR POINTING IT OUT TO EVERYONE YOU PIECE OF SH-T

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Cammie
posted a quote
December 6, 2013 10:33pm UTC

I think the creepiest thing in the world is what society
has done to the word “daddy”

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Cammie
posted a quote
June 24, 2013 9:09pm UTC

If you're ever feeling sad, just remember Justin Bieber tweeted:
"If you didn't get tickets to the believe tour, find a way to sneak in."

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greyskies
posted a quote
February 7, 2013 8:47pm UTC

& At the age of 16,
I've finally reached my
"EW BOYS!" phase.
Except it's more of an
"EW PEOPLE!" phase.

👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 128 points

spence*
posted a quote
March 22, 2014 1:08pm UTC

“I dont care about looks”
LIAR YOU’RE A LIAR
YOU ARE LYING

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Steve*
posted a quote
October 26, 2013 6:05pm UTC

my favorite mythical creatures are the happy girls in tampon commercials.

👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 98 points

Ethanol
posted a quote
July 7, 2013 10:34am UTC

do u just ever look at an old photo bravely and scream when u see ur old ugly face yea that just happened to me

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Twisted~*
posted a quote
January 27, 2013 7:13pm UTC

It's only been the first 27 days of January and there was:
-the girl who sucked on her own tampon
-the guy who ate his own sh//
-the guy who fu//ed a chicken
-the girl who fu//ed her dog 'cause she lost a bet
What's wrong with this generation..?

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🐝*
posted a quote
February 23, 2013 7:47pm UTC

why do girls still get body hair?
Hasn’t evolution realized
ain’t nobody got time for dat.

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OreoLover
posted a quote
March 24, 2013 8:00pm UTC

Copy: people at school
Paste: into the local cemetery

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MyWittyProfile
posted a quote
January 2, 2014 3:24pm UTC

DO YOU EVER JUST SEE A GIRL WHO STRAIGHTENED HER HAIR BUT THERE'S ONE PIECE THAT'S STILL WAVY AND IT BOTHERS YOU SO MUCH

👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 82 points

Melrose*
posted a quote
January 30, 2013 4:47pm UTC

has anyone ever sat down and thought
about how depressing romantic movies are.
i mean, two strangers are acting like theyre in love.
and its pretty convincing.
so i wouldnt say 'i want a love like the movies'
unless you want fake, made up love.

👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 85 points

sarahmarlowXxx
posted a quote
March 29, 2013 8:17pm UTC

But why do famous people get things for free
When they're the ones that can afford it

👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 78 points

yuzermali
posted a quote
June 19, 2013 7:30pm UTC

I used to be nice...
...but then I started bleeding from my crotch

👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 76 points

ocean pixie*
posted a quote
November 16, 2013 10:38pm UTC

Hi. I'm a boy. Here's how it goes. I'm gonna flirt with you, then diss you. I'll send you mixed messages, hit on your friends, lie to you. Then I will lead you on, so you fall for me. I'll make you happy for a night, but tomorrow I'll completely ignore you. You'll be the one I turn to when I need a friend or a confidence boost. Know what the best part is? You can't do anything about it because you love me and you don't want to lose me. Ha.
-not mine. found it on tumblr-

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BlackButterflies
posted a quote
July 11, 2013 5:34am UTC

in five thousand years, the atoms that once made up my body are not going to remember that they were ever a person
and i know this
and i know that nothing really matters
and i know how insignificant my problems are when one day the earth is going to be sucked into the sun
and i know that i am made up out of dead stars
and that i will become dead stars again.
i know all of this,
but somehow
you can make my universe feel like it is collapsing in on itself
without even saying a word.

👍 this is good · read the comments · 68 points

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Best Ew Quotes Today