Best 1d Quotes Today

MissTomlinson
posted a quote
February 22, 2013 8:22pm UTC

If Taylor and Harry were still together and I saw them:
Taylor and Harry: *making out*
Me: *gasp*
Taylor and Harry: *look at me*
Me: You're that guy from that Pepsi commercial and you're all like "and I'm Herreh!" I love that commercial!
Harry: Err, thanks.
Me: And you! You're the one that dated Joe Jonas and Lucas Till!
Taylor: *nods and smiles*
Me: And Taylor Lautner! Oh, and John Mayer and Jake Gyllenhaal!!
Taylor: *stands there awkwardly*
Me: Oh! And that guy from Glee, umm, Cory Montieth! OHH and Zac Efron! And Eddie Redmayne!
Taylor: Uh...
Me: Oh, and I can't forget Connor Kennedy!! ...Dang, that's a lot of guys... *looks at Harry* Good luck, bro.
Not meant to offend either swifties or directioners. just thought it was funny. Follow me and I'll follow back, duh.

👍 this is good · read the comments · 654 points

MissTomlinson
posted a quote
February 21, 2013 7:50pm UTC

*When I'm on Omegle*
Stranger: 19, male, England, looking for older women.
Me: Harry, get off Omegle.

👍 this is good · read the comments · 521 points

MissTomlinson
posted a quote
February 7, 2013 5:11pm UTC

Niall Horan: I hate it when girls act stupid because they think it's cute. Intelligence is attractive.
Me: One particle of unobtanium has a nuclear reaction with a flux capacitor, carry the two, change it's atomic isotope into a raioactive spider. follow for a follow.

👍 this is good · read the comments · 450 points

MissTomlinson
posted a quote
February 23, 2013 7:38pm UTC

Me: Taylor Swift is a bad singer. Do you agree?
Siri: I have no comment. I do not want a song written about me.
not mine. not meant to offend swifties, just thought it was funny. follow for a follow.

👍 this is good · read the comments · 420 points

OneDirectionQuotes
posted a quote
January 25, 2013 2:01pm UTC

In our world,
Teen pregnancy is more acceptable than gay marriage.
How messed up is that?

👍 this is good · read the comments · 332 points

MissTomlinson
posted a quote
March 10, 2013 4:45pm UTC

Me: Sometimes I just want to drag Harry into an empty hotel room, throw him down on a bed, straddle his thighs, rip his shirt off and MAKE HIM EXPLAIN EVERY DANG ONE OF HIS TATTOOS BECAUSE I CAN'T HANDLE THE SUSPENSE.
Harry: Well... I thought we were going somewhere else there...
follow for a follow

👍 this is good · read the comments · 329 points

sophsunflower12
posted a quote
March 26, 2013 5:40pm UTC

it's March. someone please enlighten me
as to why there's still snow on the ground.

👍 this is good · read the comments · 282 points

Jahyvie
posted a quote
February 25, 2013 7:42pm UTC

Harry: Who has illegally downloaded this song?
Fans: *screams*
Harry: SHAME ON YOU! SHAME ON YOU!!!

👍 this is good · read the comments · 215 points

MissTomlinson
posted a quote
February 26, 2013 7:36pm UTC

One Direction as principles scolding a student:
Niall: Never do that again! Do you understand how ba-- *lunch bell rings* GET OUTTA THE WAY! *pushes kid over and runs to cafeteria*
Harry: So basically, erm... so... like, you can't... do that...
Zayn: You need to keep your hands and feet inside the roller coaster that is life next time, okay?
Liam: Okay, I know you made a woopsy, but be good next time. Oh my, that was so harsh! I'm sorry! You know what? Here's a lollipop. And a sticker. And a golden star sticker for you! Run along now, precious little honey bunches of oats.
Louis: Do you even know who I am? Huh?? And you're gonna talk back to me!? Uh, not in my house, b/tch. Not in my house.

👍 this is good · read the comments · 242 points

MissTomlinson
posted a quote
February 24, 2013 5:47pm UTC

Interviewer: Who is your favorite singer?
Niall: Justin Bieber.
Harry: Adele.
Zayn: Bruno Mars.
Liam: Bruno Mars.
Louis: Harry Styles.
follow for a follow.

👍 this is good · read the comments · 221 points

OneDirectionQuotes
posted a quote
January 28, 2013 2:38pm UTC

Don't hate on other peoples' idols,
They could be the reason they're still alive.
Like me, One Direction helped me stop cutting.

👍 this is good · read the comments · 196 points

MissTomlinson
posted a quote
March 2, 2013 10:13pm UTC

One Direction Insults:
Louis: Boys with as/es like mine don't talk to girls with faces like yours.
Harry: I care about you like Niall cares about childbirth.
Niall: I can make your girl scream louder just by clicking the follow button.
Zayn: Your face is as ugly as mine is sexy.
Liam: I know you are but what am I!!

👍 this is good · read the comments · 204 points

MissTomlinson
posted a quote
May 6, 2013 7:29pm UTC

How Andy and Liam Became Friends:
Andy: Hey what's up, my name's Andy.
Liam: Andy?? Like the character from Toy Story!?
Andy: Uh.. yeah?
Liam: ....
Andy: ......
Liam: We're best friends.
Andy: Wha--
Liam: END OF DISCUSSION WE ARE GOING TO BE BFFS FOREVER.
Andy: Dude okay, calm down.
Liam: YOU GOT A FRIEND IN ME!
follow for a follow.

👍 this is good · read the comments · 200 points

MissTomlinson
posted a quote
February 24, 2013 5:17pm UTC

What One Direction sings in the shower:
Liam: Sunshine, lollipops, rainbows everywhere!
Zayn: I'm sexy and I know it!
Harry: It's getting hot in here, so take off all your clothes!
Louis: G-L-A-M-O-R-O-U-S, yeeeaaaaah!
Niall: Ba da da da da, I'm lovin' it!!
follow for a follow. <3

👍 this is good · read the comments · 207 points

sophsunflower12
posted a quote
March 1, 2013 3:58pm UTC

When rappers say their names at the beginning of a song
...uh, if i'm listening to your song, chances are that
i kinda already know who you are...

👍 this is good · read the comments · 201 points

MissTomlinson
posted a quote
February 18, 2013 7:07pm UTC

follow for a follow
Don't cha wish your boyfriend was
an internationally famous band
member that you've never met
and is totally out of your league
and doesn't even live in your
country and is not aware of your
existance at all
like mine?

👍 this is good · read the comments · 183 points

MissTomlinson
posted a quote
March 2, 2013 9:39pm UTC

"My favorite one in the group
was Zayn, until he stole my
meal. Now Harry is my
favorite."
-Niall Horan

👍 this is good · read the comments · 179 points

sophsunflower12
posted a quote
March 14, 2013 5:05pm UTC

so tell me,
when exactly did originality go out of style?

👍 this is good · read the comments · 175 points

MissTomlinson
posted a quote
May 31, 2013 3:49pm UTC

IF NIALL REPLACED HARRY IN THE PEPSI COMMERCIAL:
Drew: Com on kid, just give me the Pepsi.
Niall: Heck naw, it's mine! I saw it first!
Drew: Kid, I'm Drew Brees.
Niall: Niall don't care. You ain't touchin' my Pepsi!
Drew: ....Can't we at least share it?
Niall: NIALL HORAN DOESN'T SHARE!!! Besides, it's too late. You can have the can.
Drew: What?! How did you drink that whole thing!? I've been talking to you this whole time!
Niall: NIALLER LIKE A PUMA!!!

👍 this is good · read the comments · 172 points

Living_Life_Freely
posted a quote
February 24, 2013 12:46pm UTC

Niall wants a younger girlfriend.....
I volenteer as tribute

👍 this is good · read the comments · 165 points

Witty Profiles

Best 1d Quotes Today