2013
A lot of stuff happened. Some of it was great, some of it
terrible.
I made a lot of great friends.
Both here on witty (doublesidedice and fionarose especially)
and at my school. For the first time in my life I truly allowed
myself to get close to people. But I lost people too. 2013 taught
me that people are going to betray you and leave you but
sometimes it's better just to let go
I came back to my faith. I
joined my church youth group and relearned who God was. It helped
to make me stronger in myself and helped me to fight a lot of
battles I wouldn't have survived without
it.
I got into a really bad state of depress.on, caused by fights
with friends and family issues. I
started scratching everyday. Then a little bit deeper. And a
little deeper, until it turned into cutt.ng. I became afraid of
myself and the world around me, becoming slightly su.cidal yet
again.
My best friend got an eating disorder, self harmed really badly,
and I almost lost her to suic.ide.It
was really hard and caused a lot of really long hard nights and a
lot of pain both for her and for me. And at the same time, I lost
her as my true, fully there for me, best friend. Not completely
but things are different now. You can only be through so much
with somebody until you either grow closer or begin to see each
other differently. That's something I had to learn the hard
way.
My grandmother got cancer, and
for the first time in my life I had a fear that I would lose the
one person in my family who I have always been able to talk
to.
I started my sophomore year with a lot of
stress. For
the first time in my life my grades started to slip and I
didn't love school. It made me feel lonely and I found myself
staring out of windows with wanderlust but also a desire for
death.
I spent countless hours talking a random
stranger, who
is now a friend, Dani, out of throwing herself off a bridge at
the young age of 22 in Canada.
The boy of my dreams asked me to be his
girl, for
the first time n my life making me feel like I was actually
somewhat wanted.
Overall, 2013 year of lessons. Lessons which I will
remember but I am ready to leave the year in the past.
Welcome 2014, I'm ready for you.