That Feeling of---
................................................................................................................................................................................................
-being alone against the world
-losing someone that was like your older brother, someone you could
tell anything to
-being useless and stupid and incapable to fix something
-having your hopes and dreams crushed after building them up so
high
-being lied to everyday about how its going to get better
-not even trusting your own friends because you're afraid of
getting hurt again
-trying so hard to to prevent something that cant be stopped
-fighting with the guy i cant stop thinking about
-i dont even consider him as a friend but i love him anyway
(annoying sh*t-for-brains)
-being treated like a criminal by my own family
-not being good enough for them or anyone
................................................................................................................................................................................................
...I feel like ending it all
right now...just to see if I'd go to a better more peaceful
place...but I cant...i dont know why but i feel like someones
keeping me grounded...its probably all just in my head but i cant
shake it...i wish i had an answer...
Blurryface* · 1 decade ago
0
reply
Honey, you can trust me. I promise I would never hurt you (besides the occasional slap, hehe). I know it's hard, but (ik you have heard this a million times, but things do get better. I promise you that. It's not all in your head, it's Gabe, and Sarah, and Carol, and me that are keeping you here. I honestly don't know what I would do if you committed suicide. I would start to cry. And I wouldn't stop. You are like the fifth sister I never had. Over the past year we've become best friends, and we've helped each other through thick and thin. We will get through this. Yes, we. I'm here for you, and I know I've told you this a million times, but I am. Please don't do it. I know it seems like a good idea, but trust me, its the worst idea you've ever had. "It's a permanent solution to a temporary problem. It will be resolved. Try other things, like listening to music, going on a run, witty. Talking to someone. It doesn't have to be me, or Sarah, or Gabe. Anyone. Please. You could pray. Like you said, "the true ones seem to get through". You will get through, because you are kind, and funny, and can cheer someone up in an instant. He's there, watching. He's watching me write this. I mean, I'm not gonna go all "Preach it to tha LORT! HALLELUJAH!" on you, but you get the idea. I figure you're going to text me now or comment on my profile saying "calm down, Blondy" (not like im trying to speak for you, ik u hate that) But seriously, suicide is serious. I know you think your family doesnt care, but they do. They're family. Things may not be the best right now, but it does get better. I'm praying this helps to change your mind because words are all I have when trying to get my point across. I love you, Sarah loves you, Erin loves you, Sam loves you, Gabe loves you, your crazy grandma loves you, Darlene loves you, Christiane loves you, Peeta loves you, the list goes on and on. Trust me, please. Don't think like that. I know that it may seem rational or whatever, but it's not right. It'd be like losing the sun on a rainy day. You are the only person that can cheer me up, or anyone, really. You are one of a kind, Steph. Trust me.
Love youu! :)