First chapter.. tell me if I should continue?

Thursday 9/30

It was 10 AM, my alarm was going off. Last night I had set the sound to be Justin Bieber so that I could wake up to the sound of someone that I loved. I dismissed the alarm and sat up. I stared out the window to find that today was going to be a beautiful day. Yesterday it had been rainy and on days like that I just know I won’t have a great day. I got out of bed, and walked over to my window to look outside. I thought to myself, today will be a wonderful day. So many things were running through my head. The first was that I needed to shower, my hair wasn’t looking as shiny as it usually does. I showered, shaved, and washed my face. After doing so I proceeded back to my room to get dressed. I looked all around my room and just thought, oh my gosh, what to wear. I would find things that I really liked but I had nothing to pair them with. I put one thing on and then realized it looked better folded in my drawer. I didn’t know whether today I wanted to wear pants or leggings, a shirt, or a dress. I was so confused, and running out of time to think of something. I have and appointment today at 2 with my counselor Aubry. I like talking to her, for once I have someone to talk to that isn’t part of the issue, someone who won’t judge me for feeling a certain way. Anyways back to what I was saying, what was it again? Oh yeah I had no time to just sit there and try everything on, so I picked up the closest thing to me, a dress. It was a floral dress that my aunt had bought for me this summer. I liked it, and although it was already fall it was warm enough out today to get one last wear before it’s way to cold. I put the dress on and looked in the mirror. I thought to myself, wow I don’t look so bad, usually I can never say something like that about myself, but something was different about the way I was feeling today. This was exciting me, for once I was in a positive mood, about almost everything. I was about to put make up on, and fix my hair up nice, when all of a sudden there was a knock on my door. It was my dad. When I opened the door he looked very angry. He started to tell me how he was having a bad day and that it was ruined, blah blah blah. One thing that you should probably know about my dad is that when he is mad or has a strong feeling about something he yells. Sometimes he doesn’t mean to, but he does it without thinking. He was “yelling” at me about everything he could possibly think about. On the outside I kept a straight face pretending like this didn’t bother me any, but really on the inside it was killing me. You see, whenever someone yells whether it is towards me or not, I get anxious and start to get frustrated. He had gone on for about 5 minutes and finally he paused for a second. I took that opportunity to shut the door and lock it. Of course that may have not been the most respectful thing to do, but I was just getting so mad. I proceeded back upstairs into my room, and sat on my bed. Thinking to myself I said ” so much for that great day huh.” I texted my mom. The text read ” WE NEED TO MOVE NOW” See one thing you may not know is that my parents are divorced and I live in a duplex. A duplex is a kind of house that has two different sides. Basically that means that there were once two houses and they were put together. Well any who, I live on one side, while my dad and grandmother live on the other. You are probably asking yourself where my grandfather lives, but he passed away in 07. What a terrible year that was, and it seems like the years to follow have been just as bad. Losing him tore my family apart, and what used to be isn’t. We are moving soon anyways, but I just want out now. I hate living here. Everyone always says your house is your home, well my house is just a house, I don’t have a home, and right now that is what I need. I want to be able to go home and sit down and feel like everything is alright. When we move it will just be my mom, my little sister Rebecca, she is 12, and myself. I have two older siblings Jessica who is 21 and Corey who is 22. Jessica is married and lives in Tennessee with her husband, he is in the military. Corey is single, but he has a son named Cameron. When we move he is moving into his own place. Normally people would be upset about their family splitting but I am excited for the new adventures to come. Ops I just realized that I have been writing for over an hour, and its now 12:16 and I have to leave at 1. Hurrying never works out good for me, so I better be off. 

Amanda.