Join Witty Profiles!

I hate these things and how they spam my Facebook news feed, so I'm putting a bunch of funny ones here:)

Dude, she just called you a hobo!
OH HELL NO! Hold my.................. Well this is awkward.

Dude, she just called you pretty!
OH HELL NO! Holy my, actually, tell her I said thanks!

Dude, she just called you something which you are!
OH HELL NO! Hold my object which reinforces the stereotype that I fit.

Dude, she just called you a Mexican!
OH HELL NO! Hold my cell phone!
What does that have to do with being Mexican..?
Absolutely nothing, why?
Nothing, I just thought since you were Mexican you'd be holding a taco or something.

Dude, she just called you retarded!
Hahahaha potatoes.

Dude she just called you hot!
OH HELL NO! Actually, HELL YES hold my pants;)

Dude she just called you a pedophile!
OH HELL NO! Hold Charlie Bob Crystal Robin Kevin Joseph and Shondra.

Dude she just called you MC Hammer!
OH HELL NO! Hold my.... LOL JK, can't touch this ;D

Dude she just called-
You know what? I don't care what she just called me. To be honest, I'm slightly confused as to how you keep hearing what she just said without me being aware of it, as we are obviously in close proximity. Oh, and another thing, how many more things can you hold? Seriously, you already have my turtle, Black Ops, cake, and mascara, among other things. Just, just stop. Please.

♥

Next Quote >