It's called love;)110
 
Weeks passed, and eventually people stopped treating me like a mental patient, and stopped feeling sorry for Justin. Before we knew it, a whole year passed since we lost Sam. And I only had 3 more letters to find. I guess you could be mad that I skipped through so much time, but really nothing happened. I’m about to be a sophomore and high school, summer’s right around the corner and I guess it’s safe to say my ex boyfriend died. Justin and I are so unbelievably close now it’s ridiculous. I’m on my way over to Sam’s house to get my 67^th letter from Sam. Sam told his mom that I’d be over one day looking for something and so when I came over she wasn’t very surprised. She let me in and told me to head upstairs to his room. I ran up the stairs, I remember the last few times I ran up these stairs.. With Sam, to well you know what. For Sam, on his last day. When I got to his room I kinda hesitated to open the door. I’ve dreamt I was talking to Sam every night since then, I’ve never felt like I really lost him, like he was always kinda in his room and just never came out except in my dreams to see me. To talk to me from heaven, and that is what kept me okay, it kept me alright, even if it meant I was insane I felt happy for once even without him. He was still showing up and telling me everything was okay, and we would talk like we use to and he would just randomly tell me things I never knew, or where the next letter I couldn’t find was I honestly feel like I’m talking to Sam in my dreams, like its really him. Then when I wake up my bed smells like him, like he was laying with me all night. If I open this door, it might change everything. What if he stops coming to see me? What if my brain finally says that Sam laying with me every night and holding me, and talking to me, everything is so very illogical it doesn’t make sense. I know it doesn’t make sense but I believe he’s really with me at night. I can almost hear him from last night, telling me not to be afraid to just go in and sit on the bed and read the letter. To feel him put his hand on my shoulder, he said he will never leave me when I need him, and if one day he doesn’t show up its because I no longer need him..What if this is his test? To see if I can go into that room and do what he wants and I don’t see him tonight? All this stress must mean I’m not ready to live without him still maybe he knows that, maybe all this freaking out is because he knows I’m still not ready to lose him. Then out of nowhere I felt a hand on my back, I turn around to see Sam’s mom.
 
Sandy: It’s okay honey, take your time.