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  1. x3wittyfades x3wittyfades
    posted a quote
    April 15, 2011 5:00pm UTC
    when you're home alone and
    someone knocks on your door;;
    10% say "who is it?"
    64% look through the peep hole.
    25% open the door
    1%-Crawl around on the ground like a ninja and look through the window very quietly to make sure it isn't a masked murder
    fave if you're that 1% (;

  2. singxlovex4 singxlovex4
    posted a quote
    June 30, 2011 5:34pm UTC
    My 21 year old brother
    had prom a few weeks ago.
    My brother has Down Syndrome..
    He had his first kiss that night with another Down Syndrome girl.
    Fav if you think that's adorable♥

  3. badwolf* badwolf*
    posted a quote
    September 29, 2011 4:34pm UTC
    ♥ this and your nose will automatically
    itch

  4. briiitttttttany briiitttttttany
    posted a quote
    July 20, 2011 7:06pm UTC
    Nice tan,
    What's your race? Carrot?

  5. LiFexCaNxBexHaRdx LiFexCaNxBexHaRdx
    posted a quote
    August 22, 2010 7:53pm UTC
    CANCEL CANCEL CANCEL!
    Message Sent.
    Kill me now.

  6. texaskangaroo texaskangaroo
    posted a quote
    October 11, 2010 10:10pm UTC
    this Halloween
    i'm dressing all in red
    and trick-or-treating at 4 PM
    so i can say
    "i'm your period, and i came early."

  7. storyaboutagirl storyaboutagirl
    posted a quote
    August 7, 2010 5:43pm UTC
    I just want to see who is more on witty profiles
    Middle Schoolers or High Schoolers?
    So, if you a Middle Schooler please favorite
    and if your a high schooler please leave
    a quick comment
    -xoxo

  8. MeBeNiKsiE MeBeNiKsiE
    posted a quote
    December 10, 2010 2:48pm UTC
    TODAY,
    I saw a cute little six or seven year old girl wearing Hannah Montana socks.
    I asked her if she liked Hannah Montana.
    She said no; she liked to wear these socks,
    because she got to step on Miley Cyrus every time she walked.
    I l o v e t h i s k i d .
    MLIA :)

  9. cherrypink cherrypink
    posted a quote
    February 11, 2011 3:00pm UTC
    I BLAME MOVIES
    for my high expectations of relationships

  10. wittygirl2010 wittygirl2010
    posted a quote
    January 14, 2011 4:39pm UTC
    ‎3 yrs old "Mommy, I love you."
    13 yrs old "Mom, whatever!"
    16 yrs old: "My mom is so annoying!"
    18 yrs old "I wanna leave this house."
    25 yrs old: "Mom, you were right"
    30 yrs old "I want to go back to my Mom's house".
    50 yrs old: "I don't want to lose my mom."
    70 yrs old: "I would give up EVERYTHING for my mom to be here.....with me."
    ---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
    You only have 1 mom.
    Fave this if you appreciate
    & love your mom!
    text message*

  11. gabby1296 gabby1296
    posted a quote
    January 22, 2011 9:06pm UTC
    I'm suspended from school for 3 months
    A few weeks ago, my best friend's mom was diagnosed with
    cancer
    She cried on my shoulder in the middle of a hallway full of people
    asking "Who did it"
    One of the popular kids walked up to her and said
    "get over it"
    I've never hit anyone harder
    -tumblr

  12. KrystalKastles KrystalKastles
    posted a quote
    August 19, 2011 9:49pm UTC
    I can't wait to get married,because it's like a sleepover every night with your best friend. -my little brother's friend. ♥

  13. truegurl09 truegurl09
    posted a quote
    November 4, 2010 4:20pm UTC
    Boys are Stronger Than Girls?
    Please...
    Can you bleed for a week and survive?
    Can you squeeze 14 inch baby from a 9 centimeter hole?
    Can you carry a 7 pound baby in your stomach for 9 months?
    Can you take care of a child, cook, clean, and talk on the phone atonce?
    Can you carry 10 8 pound s.h.o.p.p.i.n.g b.a.g.s?
    Can you go a [[week]] only eating [[salad]]?
    Can you --->face heartbreak?
    Can you watch the (love of your life) be with someone else?
    Can you burn your forehead with a straightener and not complain?
    Can you wear a thin piece of s t r i n g in your a s s all day?
    Can you walk all day in 4 inch stilletos?
    Can you cry all night then wake up the next morning like everythings okay?
    I Didn't Think So.

  14. idance idance
    posted a quote
    June 3, 2011 6:30pm UTC
    TODAY, AT PICK UP AT THE ELEMENTARY SCHOOL, A SECOND GRADE GIRL STARTED SPRINTING AND SCREAMED "MOMMY!'
    A WOMEN NEXT TO ME SAID "GOD, I WOULD HATE TO HAVE THAT CHILD, SHE'S SO LOUD HER MOM MUST BE EMBARRASSED.
    I TURNED & SAW A WOMEN IN AN ARMY UNIFORM BURST INTO TEARS AND SWEEP THE LITTLE GIRL INTO A HUG.
    THIS GIVES ME HOPE.

  15. seemskindafitchy seemskindafitchy
    posted a quote
    May 24, 2011 6:51pm UTC
    REASONS WHY PERIODS SUCK.
    1. after sitting down for a while, you stand up and suddenly it feels like freaking niagra falls.
    2. you want to hit everyone...in the face...with a shovel.
    3. you cry so much for random stupid reasons.
    4. you crave random crap, that you don't own.
    5. when someone corrects you, you feel like shoving a wii remote down there throats.
    6. when you lose at something, you scream "SCREW THIS" and walk away really angry.
    7. you fall asleep...when you're not even that TIRED.
    8. you feel like you want to just stab yourself 600 times in 'that' area.
    9. you want to just shove a freaking towel up 'that' area.
    10. NO white pants that week.
    11. remember that cute pair of undies you got? runied. for. life.
    12. everybody is annoying, not matter WHAT they do, or say.
    13. when you DON'T get to go to the bathroom, because your teacher says "no" you want to scream in their face, and say "I'M ON MY FREAKING PERIOD OKAY?".
    14. boys are 10x more annoying.
    15. those stupid- pad/tampon commercials that have all those girls who are 'HAPPY' when they get their periods, make you annoyed.
    16. chocolate and ice cream are your best friends.
    17. the cramps you get feel like your being punched in the stomach 8 times.
    18. when you think you're finally 'done' you take off the weapons of tampons/pads.....5 minutes later you check. not done, not done at all.
    19. you don't care about anything BUT food.
    20. you wish you weren't a girl.
    21. when you wake up in the morning, and go to the bathroom, and your toilet looks like a freaking bowl of Hawaiian Punch.
    nmf.

  16. xoxocynthia xoxocynthia
    posted a quote
    June 29, 2011 9:53pm UTC
    Imagine
    if you called a wrong number, and the person you called was a celebrity
    -Hello? Mom?
    -No. This is Lady Gaga.

  17. ohhshanappp ohhshanappp
    posted a quote
    April 15, 2011 5:09pm UTC
    Dear Teachers, if I sit next to
    |||||||||||||||||||||||| my best friend, I'll whisper to her. If you move me away, I'll shout to her. It's your choice.

  18. x3_never_let_go x3_never_let_go
    posted a quote
    July 17, 2009 2:19pm UTC
    HEY 90'S KIDS;
    Remember when..
    Everyone owned a pair of light up sneakers?
    Hey Arnold and Full House were the best shows ever?
    Everyone could sing the rap to Fresh Prince of Belair?
    "Talk to the hand" said it all?
    The ultimate comeback was "Well why don't you marry it?"
    Enie Meanie Minie Mo solved every little problem?
    Almost every sentence was finished with the word "NOT"?
    Everyone had at least one Tamagochi?
    When you learned the planets in school, Pluto was one of them?
    All movies came out on VHS?
    The Rugrats were still babies?
    Bill Nye was the smartest guy ever?
    You took plastic cartoon lunchboxes to school?
    Mr. Rogers was the coolest man alive?
    You knew the pink and red power rangers were meant to be together?
    Comic Sans MS was the coolest font ever?
    FAVORITE IF YOU REMEMBER<3

  19. Want_Ya Want_Ya
    posted a quote
    September 27, 2011 8:49pm UTC
    There are 6,930,055,154
    people in the world.
    Why are you letting just one
    ruin your life ?
    --Patrick Star

  20. clicktheheartif clicktheheartif
    posted a quote
    September 9, 2011 9:03pm UTC
    Hey, you there!
    Can you stop scrolling
    for just a second;
    and click the heart for...
    the ones who lost
    their lives on
    Sept. 11, 2001.

:)

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