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Quotes added on Monday, May 11 2020

  1. akatsukiiprincess* akatsukiiprincess*
    posted a quote
    May 11, 2020 4:46am UTC
    Here I am, checking in, again.
    I dont know what to say but I know I just want someone to talk to. I don't know how to be alone, when its just me and my thoughts I feel so empty. I feel so defeated and so lost. I don't know how to live inside my own head all the time, theres no way. I cant sit in silence, its absolute agony. I just need someone I can talk to someone I can turn to, someone I can hold onto. Each day I get further and further away and each time its harder and harder to come back. I really just need something, anything to hold onto.

  2. Dudu* Dudu*
    posted a quote
    May 11, 2020 10:45pm UTC
    when the stress of it all made my appetite wither away.
    when old habits that brought sadness and loneliness consoled me.
    i noticed a correlation between my intake and mood.
    every time i became more proud and sensitive.
    every word said, every look. it began to feel like an attack.
    i numbed it away through sugar highs.
    the ketone highs following after a few days of self-hatred.
    when endorphins were the only thing keeping me together.
    loving what i was seeing yet ending each day on the verge of tears.
    loneliness made everyone an enemy.
    missing out on memories i'll never have because i couldn't accept myself.
    i couldn't love myself yet, i had more work to do.
    looking back at group photos without me, knowing what i was doing while they were taken.
    everyone else was a distraction, a hurdle that needed to stop sabotaging me.
    i didn't know it then. how scary habits are.

  3. Dudu* Dudu*
    posted a quote
    May 11, 2020 10:59pm UTC
    maybe it was difficult for me, i just didn't know it then.
    i must have struggled. it must have been so hard.
    i was doing so well, i just didn't realise it.
    perhaps i was more hurt than i thought.
    deep down i wanted you to congratulate me.
    instead you said, "you've ruined yourself."
    i blocked it out but thought about it over and over.
    2 years on and i still think about it often.
    things must have been really difficult for me then.
    when it was all that made me happy,
    when i was in that fragile state,
    you didn't have to use those words.
    you didn't actually have to congratulate me.
    you didn't have to look at me like that.

:)

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