Demonicangel31 posted a quote
November 8, 2015 10:37am UTC
Sometimes it's hard to find the motivation to open your eyes and acknowledge that the night may be over but nightmare of life is ready to begin again. Another day of mental and emotional torture; and no matter what you do, how much you plead for an end, you realize that your nightmares are sweeter than reality. Your nightmares are a lie, but this is reality...
At some point you will realize that you have done too much for someone, that the only next possible step to do is to stop. Leave them alone. Walk away. It's not like you're giving up, and it's not like you shouldn't try. It's just that you have to draw the line of determination from desperation. What is truly yours will eventually be yours, and what is not, no matter how hard you try, will never be.
See, I don't believe in the kindness of strangers. But I want to. God, I'm trying to. I wish I could say I've stopped believing in wishing wells; (but i've kept all the pennies in my pocket from the beginning) wish I could say this is where the scar started (but this is how it began ); wish I could tell you all the wishes I made at 11:11 (i didn't, but i did think about the ones i could). The only wishes I made were on stars, but I'm still looking up and I'm still bandaging wounds. That one stayed. I don't know what to tell you. I'm trying to believe that people can be kind (when i'm not) and I'm trying to trust (when i won't). I do wish--- God, I want to (be) .
xxi. i could believe that you would still love me when i've thrown your favourite mug at the wall by your head and my eyes are cruel and i've just demanded you forget me and move on. i could believe you'd hold on through the storm. i c o u l d b e l i e v e i t .
xxiv. but but why? i don't understand, i don't get it, why? you could have the world. anyone, anywhere, whatever you wanted, however you asked --- and you settled for me, and i don't understand why why why.
xxv. i could really do with you right now. i'm trying to wait, trying to be patient, trying to believe, but it's hard, baby, it's really hard. i'm scared of spending my life writing letters to someone who might never show up.