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toocooltofool

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Member Since: 30 Oct 2011 08:34pm

Last Seen: 18 Nov 2015 10:20pm

user id: 232793

55 Quotes
500 Favorites
1 Following
13 Followers
-1 Comment Points
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  1. toocooltofool toocooltofool
    posted a quote
    September 6, 2012 3:31pm EDT
    "You can be the ripest, juiciest peach in the world, and there’s still going to be somebody who hates peaches."
    – Dita Von Teese

  2. toocooltofool toocooltofool
    posted a quote
    August 29, 2012 7:33pm EDT
    I wanna date a guy with a british accent before I die.

  3. toocooltofool toocooltofool
    posted a quote
    August 13, 2012 2:16pm EDT
    You can never be too old for peanut butter & graham crackers. :P

  4. toocooltofool toocooltofool
    posted a quote
    August 3, 2012 4:44pm EDT
    I probably could stand a chance on American Idol if I could bring my shower on stage.

  5. toocooltofool toocooltofool
    posted a quote
    August 2, 2012 1:38pm EDT
    That awkward moment when there is no awkward moment, you’re just awkward.

  6. toocooltofool toocooltofool
    posted a quote
    August 1, 2012 10:39pm EDT
    "The trouble with quotes on the internet is it's difficult to determine if they are genuine." - Abraham Lincoln

  7. toocooltofool toocooltofool
    posted a quote
    July 31, 2012 2:38pm EDT
    The Olympics are a great way of reminding myself of all the countries that I didn’t know existed.
    Plot twist: The queen locks everyone in the stadium and shouts “Happy hunger games!”

  8. toocooltofool toocooltofool
    posted a quote
    July 30, 2012 1:48pm EDT
    Thank God I found the good in goodbye.

  9. toocooltofool toocooltofool
    posted a quote
    July 30, 2012 1:13pm EDT
    That awkward moment when you wake up from a nap with one sock on.

  10. toocooltofool toocooltofool
    posted a quote
    July 30, 2012 1:07pm EDT
    I wonder what Krabby Patties taste like.

  11. toocooltofool toocooltofool
    posted a quote
    July 29, 2012 8:30pm EDT
    Why is "patience" a virtue? Why can't "hurry the f**k up" be a virtue?

  12. toocooltofool toocooltofool
    posted a quote
    July 28, 2012 11:37am EDT
    Still have a sore throat but I have a first date to get to. I sound like an old lady who's been smoking for 50 years, so I'm gonna be poppin throat drops half the time. Not even gonna over-compensate by wearing a low-cut top. Maybe I want this to fail...we'll see.

  13. toocooltofool toocooltofool
    posted a quote
    July 24, 2012 11:42pm EDT
    If you let the refrigerator door gently shut on you it feels like a hug from a polar bear.

  14. toocooltofool toocooltofool
    posted a quote
    July 23, 2012 9:01pm EDT
    My mom has been an operating room nurse for over 25 years and she's trained to use laser surgery equipment at work
    but she still needs me to help her find the rewind button on the Directtv remote.

  15. toocooltofool toocooltofool
    posted a quote
    July 11, 2012 3:42am EDT
    I hate you, then I love you.
    It's like I want to throw you off a cliff, then
    rush to the bottom and catch you. </3

  16. toocooltofool toocooltofool
    posted a quote
    July 10, 2012 12:42am EDT
    Twitter is the only place I can b*tch & complain and not care if someone unfriends me for being an annoying brat.

  17. toocooltofool toocooltofool
    posted a quote
    July 6, 2012 10:50pm EDT
    A sharks brain looks the same as the female reproductive system. (Google it.)
    My period will now be called Shark Week.

  18. toocooltofool toocooltofool
    posted a quote
    July 6, 2012 6:55pm EDT
    I only trust people who like big butts.
    Because they can not lie.

  19. toocooltofool toocooltofool
    posted a quote
    July 6, 2012 4:00pm EDT
    My fb news feed right now:
    - People complaining about how hot it is outside.
    - People complaining about people complaining about how hot it is outside.
    - People complaining about people complaining about people complaining about how hot it is outside.
    Chicago weather sucks, it's either too hot or too cold. =/

  20. toocooltofool toocooltofool
    posted a quote
    July 5, 2012 11:57pm EDT
    I wish I could illegally download handbags from the internet.

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