Witty Profiles

sassarelli0302

1. sassarelli0302
   posted a quote
   November 21, 2013 10:57am UTC
   And Life asked Death,
   "Why do people love me
   but hate you?"
   Death replied,
   "Because I am a painful truth,
   and you are a beautiful lie."
   
   👍 this is good · read the comments · 3 points
2. sassarelli0302
   posted a quote
   June 13, 2013 1:18pm UTC
   If you are depressed just think about this,
   You are now one day closer to eating your next plate of nachos
   
   👍 this is good · read the comments · 4 points
3. sassarelli0302
   posted a quote
   June 13, 2013 1:11pm UTC
   Things we all do but hate when others do them #1:
   when someone walks really slow in front of you but can't walk in a straight line so it's impossible to pass them
   
   👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 2 points
4. sassarelli0302
   posted a quote
   June 13, 2013 1:08pm UTC
   You can't jump the track
   We're like cars on a cable
   Lifes like an hourglass
   Glued to the table
   No one can fine the rewind button, girl
   So cradle your head in your hands
   
   👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 2 points
5. sassarelli0302
   posted a quote
   June 4, 2013 1:16pm UTC
   So there was this one time in my history class. My teacher walked in excitedly with a huge smile on his face. This naturally made all of us nervous because we assumed he was happy because he was giving us a pop quiz. He walked to the front of the class and said "I've been waiting for this moment my entire teaching career," then he said, in a flawless Allan Rickman impersonation,
   "Turn to page 394"
   Best. Day. Ever.
   
   👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 7 points
6. sassarelli0302
   posted a quote
   June 3, 2013 7:48pm UTC
   I think people would get out of the way of ambulances a lot faster if instead of sirens they played
   MOVE B.TCH GET OUT THE WAY
   
   👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 5 points
7. sassarelli0302
   posted a quote
   May 16, 2013 9:22am UTC
   Me and my friend formed a club
   We named it society. Now we go around to random people and hand them letters that tell them they have been rejected by society
   
   👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 5 points
8. sassarelli0302
   posted a quote
   April 25, 2013 1:19pm UTC
   What doesn't kill you, usually succeeds in the second attempt.
   -Mr. Krabs
   
   👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 2 points
9. sassarelli0302
   posted a quote
   April 22, 2013 1:11pm UTC
   Theres something that lingers in your words even when you're gone
   ♥
   
   👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 1 point
10. sassarelli0302
    posted a quote
    April 22, 2013 1:08pm UTC
    I'd like to think I could cheat it all
    To make up for the times I've been cheated on
    
    👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 0 points
11. sassarelli0302
    posted a quote
    April 18, 2013 1:09pm UTC
    Failure is not defined by those who fought and did not fall but by those who fought, fell, and did not get up again
    ~♦~
    
    👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 6 points
12. sassarelli0302
    posted a quote
    April 18, 2013 1:07pm UTC
    Jesus could walk on water. Cucumbers are 96% water. I can walk on cucumbers. I am 96% Jesus.
    
    👍 this is good · read the comments · 13 points
13. sassarelli0302
    posted a quote
    April 15, 2013 6:25pm UTC
    I knew I was in love with you when I woke up
    smiling and realize it was because I dreamt of you
    <3
    
    👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 4 points
14. sassarelli0302
    posted a quote
    April 12, 2013 1:17pm UTC
    BravoSierra's format
    Do you ever feel like you're just waiting
    for something but you don't know what?
    
    👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 5 points
15. sassarelli0302
    posted a quote
    April 11, 2013 1:12pm UTC
    The Devil you know beats
    the Devil you don't
    
    👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 1 point
16. sassarelli0302
    posted a quote
    April 11, 2013 1:10pm UTC
    There are mistakes and regrets
    mistakes are choices we make that we wish we didn't
    regrets are choices we didn't make that we wish we had
    but at the end of the day we obsess we obsess over what could have been
    we have conversations in our heads of things we wish we said
    we replay moments over and over again wishing we had done something
    at the end of the day we think of our regrets not our mistakes
    so say everything thats on your mind
    do everything you want to do
    live life to the fullest
    make all the mistakes you can so that in the end you can say you lived with no regrets
    
    👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 6 points
17. sassarelli0302
    posted a quote
    April 10, 2013 1:10pm UTC
    Who else thought of Drake Bell shouting "I hope they cancel Oprah" and Josh Peck yelling "You take that back" when Oprah was cancelled?
    
    👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 8 points
18. sassarelli0302
    posted a quote
    March 26, 2013 1:44pm UTC
    Life has killed the
    dream I dreamed
    
    👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 8 points
19. sassarelli0302
    posted a quote
    March 26, 2013 1:11pm UTC
    and if you fall as Lusifer fell
    you fall in flame
    and so it has been for so it is written
    on the doorway to paradise
    that those who falter and those who fall
    shall pay the price
    
    👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 4 points
20. sassarelli0302
    posted a quote
    March 26, 2013 9:55am UTC
    Stupidity should be a crime punishable by making them listen to their own stupid comments
    
    👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 4 points

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