rissa7373's Favorites

Butterbear
posted a quote
April 28, 2013 2:19am UTC

That awkward moment when you
walk into a bathroom and end up
walking right back out when you
see popular people in there.
tumblr

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GodsGurllyyGurl
posted a quote
April 28, 2013 4:28pm UTC

fool me once shame on you
fool me twice shame on me
fool me 783,977,465 times
and you're a weather man

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Btrytobefunny
posted a quote
April 28, 2013 12:23pm UTC

Dear Girls,
Bruno Mars may take 1 grenade for you but we take hundreds.
Sincerely,
The army.
I have respect for our heroes<3

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capsized*
posted a quote
April 28, 2013 12:37am UTC

DESCRIBE THE COLOR
red [x] [x] [x]
WITH OUT USING THE WORD RED.
When you dip her in the middle of
the dance floor, it is the color of her
dress.
When she whispers in your ear, it is
the color of her lips.
When you make love, it is the trace
you want her to leave all over your
body.
When she places her palm over your
heart, it is the color that come to the
surface as her fingertips trail like a
sentence that can never be finished.
When you see her in your bedroom
with another, it is the color of your
breath.
When you smash the vase in the hall,
it is the color that threatens you to
abandon the shattered pieces.
when you scream at the top of your
lungs, it is the color that pierces the
atmosphere.
When she hears you, it is the color
of her pulse.
When you look into her eyes for the
last time, it is the fading color of
your heart falling to your knees.
It is not the color you see when
she leaves.

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Hale_Storm18
posted a quote
April 28, 2013 1:41pm UTC

I wouldn't be afraid of spiders if I could just talk to them, ya know?
Me: Oh, hey woah, this shower is occupied.
Spider: Oh my gosh, man, I didn't see you there
Me: We cool?
Spider: Yeah, yeah, we're cool. I'm just coming down to scope out the tub.
Me: Oh, that's legit. Hey, you wanna move over some--you're descending right now into the shower stream and I don't want to drown you
Spider: Hey, thanks bud. I'll be careful.
Me: So, can I get out now?
Spider: Sure, sure! Sorry, I'll just move over here
Me: Thanks. You have a nice night. Don't come into my bedroom, okay?
Spider: Nah, that's your space. We're cool. Have a great evening.

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Hale_Storm18
posted a quote
April 28, 2013 1:56pm UTC

Sexual orientation: Not you.

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Cammie
posted a quote
April 28, 2013 3:31pm UTC

The sentence "Are you as bored as I am?" can be read backwards and still makes sense.

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Cammie
posted a quote
April 28, 2013 3:45pm UTC

imagine an entire room and it's all bed.
no floor, just bed.
you roll too far to one side?
don't worry, bed's still there.
all is bed.

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Hale_Storm18
posted a quote
April 28, 2013 1:49pm UTC

Friend: Next time a blocked number calls you, answer like this--"Jim's wh.ore house. You got the dough, we got the hoe."
Me: No. How about, "Nashville sp.erm bank, you squeeze it we freeze it. How may I help you?"
Friend: No, you should say--"Henderson's Morgue, you stab em, we slab em. This is Eight Ball speaking."
Me: I think I should say, "Texas creatorium. You kill 'em, we grill 'em. How can I direct your call?"

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EmilyStyles
posted a quote
December 31, 2012 3:41pm UTC

Person: You dont have to be skinny to be pretty
Me: Yeah, but skinny girls are prettier

👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 196 points

jimmy365
posted a quote
December 31, 2012 11:36am UTC

I JUST PICKED UP THE PHONE BECAUSE MY SCHOOL WAS CALLING AND IT'S ALWAYS A RECORDING BUT IT WAS MY VICE PRINCIPAL'S VOICE TALKING ABOUT HOW SCHOOL STARTS TOMORROW AND I GRUNTED "NOOOOOO" AND HE SAID
"excuse me"

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