I like to study the effects of drugs (hallucinogens are my favorite). Most of the time I just kinda feel worthless. I like the smell of paint, chlorine, and gasoline. Tattoos and peircings are super attractive. Super kawaii. I'm obsessed with death yet scared of it at the same time. No one really understands my weirdness so they all just think I'm on drugs. Dan Howell, Amazing Phil, and Christian Novelli, All Time Low, and a few other bands are my idols. I have a crush on Dan Howell and Phil Lester, oops. My clebrity crushes are Oli Sykes, Jack Barakat, and Alex Gaskarth woooo.
Let's start on a happy note:
I'll try not to be that depressing, I promise. Please be my friend I don' have any real ones you internet folk are so much cooler than those real life peasants. I like to fangirl. Being in multiple fandoms sucks, especially when your fandoms hate eachother. I may or may not have Jack Barakat hidden in my closet but please don't open the door and check he's good at escaping. I've been playing the cello for 6 years. I can play the ukulele. I hoard birds, I have 4 of them living in my room (RIP Peep, God rest her little bird soul.) My two favorite things are bands and drag queens. They're both fabulooooous.
Music I like more than other humans: All Time Low, Fall Out Boy, Panic! at the Disco, My Chemical Romance, Sleeping With Sirens, Pierce the Veil, The Vamps, Blink 182, Nirvana, The Beatles, Falling In Reverse, Mayday Parade, Never Shout Never, The Ready Set, The Gorillaz, The Academy Is..., Green Day, Cute is What We Aim For, Gym Class Heroes, Patrick Stump, The Killers, The Cab, Maroon 5, You Me at Six, Bring Me the Horizon, Escape the Fate, Of Mice and Men, Ghost Town, Suicide Silence (RIP Mitch </3) & more. (I'm the only teenage girl who hates Taylor Swift and One Direction oh my.)
it’s been a long time since we’ve spoken dear and i can’t help but to think of how your fingers fit perfectly between mine or how your hair perfectly hid your face and that one freckle that was next to your left eye you never liked your large hands but i loved how they kept mine warm in the winter and you hated your haircut but i thought it made you look beautiful and you couldn’t stand that one little freckle but i thought it was perfect i hated my abused wrists but you would kiss them every day and i never liked my haircut either but you said it was gorgeous and i always tried to hide that one scar on my right cheek but you told me it just added to my beauty we both hated ourselves and loved each other and lived for one another so that’s why when you told be to keep strong for you that you couldn’t make it anymore i felt that a part of me died too i.m.
I used to live in a world where I couldn’t wait to go to sleep because my dreams were better than my reality. Everything around me while I was awake was terrifying. Eventually those fears moved into my dreams, and now I can’t fall asleep at night. My dreams are haunting and terrifyingly vivid. Everything I’m scared of has seeped into my dreams and now I’m just scared to live.
the bed the bed is so warm with you laying here by my side and we lay and laugh and slowly drift to sleep the bed is lonely when you spend your nights out and come home drunk and sleep on the couch the bed is chilly without you laying here next to me because you stay at her house now and pretend I don’t know about it the bed is weary and you’re not around to care because we’ve said our goodbyes and you went on your way the bed is empty because I couldn’t bare to sleep or even live without you so no one is around to use it anymore -i.m.
Always remember to tell your idol you love them, because some day they'll be gone and you'll lose your chance. RIP Cory Monteith He wasn't my idol, but he sure was a lot of peoples. My heart goes out to all of his family, friends, and fans.
I once knew this girl who had the brightest eyes who wore tight pigtails and would always look forward to the future and had all the friends she needed. I once knew this girl who's eyes still shined who would let her hair fall and would look forward to most things and had a good amount of friends. I once knew this girl who's eyes grew darker her hair became straight and fake and she was very unmotivated and her friends were making new friends. I once knew this girl who's eyes were dull who gave up on doing her hair because she had no energy and seemed to only have one or two friends. I once knew this girl who's eyes we're always tear stained and her hair was a mess and she didn't care about her future anymore because she had no one left. I once knew this girl but sadly she's gone now. -My poem