I'm Peyton, almost 14.
going into 8th grade.
my lovers are Christopher Drew Ingle and Kurt Cobain<3.
cheerleading, food, photography, music, and vacations make up my life.
i am very unique and quite confusing.
i do not have any self-confindance.
everyone at my school is in a "clique" i am in many (:
i hate having one "best friend" and writing is my passion. i am a crazy girl with a bad reputation.
i don't care what anyone says or thinks about me.
one less person i have to deal with is my favorite saying.
my favorite life quote is;
"never stop, keeping going until you have come to the edge, then jump to the next edge."
-bowling for soup.
-vacations in the tropic.
that's it ya'll.
the curtain is now closed.
Graduated high school. Kissed someone. Smoked a cigarette. Got so drunk you passed out. rode every ride at an amusment park Collected something really stupid. Gone to a rock concert. Helped someone. Gone fishing. Watched four movies in one night. Gone long periods of time with out sleep. Lied to someone. Snorted cocaine. Failed a class. Smoked weed. Dealt drugs. Been in a car accident. Been in a tornado. Done hard drugs (i.e. ecstasy, heroin, crack, meth, acid). Watched someone die. Been to a funeral. Burned yourself. ran a marathon Cried yourself to sleep. Spent over $200 in one day. Flown on a plane. Cheated on someone. Been cheated on. Written a 10 page letter. Gone skiing. Been sailing. Cut yourself on accident. Had a best friend. Lost someone you loved. Shoplifted something. Been to jail. Dangerously close to being in jail. Had detention. Skipped school. Got in trouble for something you didn’t do. Stolen books from the library. Gone to a different country. Dropped out of school. Been in a mental hospital. Watched the "Harry Potter" movies. Had an online diary. Fired a gun. Had a yard sale. Had a lemonade stand. Actually made money at the lemonade stand. Been in a school play. Been fired from a job. Taken a lie detector test. Swam with dolphins. Gone to sea world. Voted for someone on a reality TV show. Written poetry. Read more than 20 books a year. Gone to Europe. Loved someone you shouldn’t have. Used a coloring book over age 12. Had surgery. Had stitches. Taken a taxi. Seen the Washington Monument. Had more than 5 IM’s/online conversations going at once. Overdosed. Had a drug or alcohol problem. Been in a fist fight. Suffered any form of abuse. Had a hamster. Pet a wild animal. Used a credit card. Gone surfing in California. Did "spirit day" at school. Dyed your hair. Got a tattoo. Had something pierced. Got straight A’s. Been on the Honor Roll. Known someone with HIV or AIDS. Taken pictures with a webcam. Started a fire.
letter number 18. Dear The Person That You Wish You Could Be. you are perfect, you don't have big thigs, or cut marks on them. you don't get used by boys because you have big boobs. you are liked by everyone all grades. you get amazing grades. you're hair is always straight. you have a 6 pack. you can buy anything. you make the driving aged changed to 14. and you can change anything. you never cut yourself. you don't have ADD like i do. you're family is perfect and rich. you on vacation whenever you want. with love, Peyton
this is for everyone that is following me; i am making a new account. yes i will still have the peyton11 account. but i need a fresh start. so follow me on my new one :) i'll put the link on the peyton11 profile soon! thanks<3
letter number 3. Dear my sibling. Shelby, my beautiful younger sister. you're only 3 years old and we have a ten years age difference, but i love you. were acctually half sisters, because we have different fathers. but i love as like you were a whole sister. i treat you like my own child, you're father is only living in our house til mommy gets a car. then he's out, he treats all of us horrible. you included. he yells at you and i flip out. he trys to hit you and i stand in the way and swear at him. you have to listen to mommy and dad fight just as much as i do. when you were in the room where daddy was punching mommy i ran in, in tears and took you out and we went into the basement so we wouldn't have to listen to it. i love you so much. if i didn't have you in my life i probably would've commited suicide by now. but i can't leave you, and mommy told me that if anything happened to either of us she would die, and if me and her were dead. you would go to foster care. and i couldn't put you through that, cause i almost had to go myself. i love you so much shelby, you don't even know. yeah we fight like normal sister's but our loving bond is stronger than i've seen anyone else's. i love you. love, Peyton
letter number 2. dear crush, matthew day. you don't really know me, i've met you once. but i feel in love with you that day . i've loved you since. but you have a girlfriend. so it would never work out. sorry for wasting my time writing this. </3. love, Peyton
letter number 1. Dear Best Friend, Memere, i miss you everyday. i can't believe it's almost 6 years since you left so suddenly. i was only 7. you weren't there to see me graduate 5th grade and you're not gonna be there to see my graduate 8th grade this coming year and you're not going to be there to see me graduate high school in 2015. when i graduate high school it will be 11 years without you, without you're amazing smile, you're loving hugs, you're sweet kisses. i never really got to know you memere, but mommy tells me about you every time i ask. you gave me a teddy bear angel in a ballet tu-tu and it has wings and a halo, i use that to remember you, because that's the last thing you gave me at the last dance rectial that you went to of mine. then you got really really really sick and you were always in bed. i would come over you're house and mommy would say that you weren't feeling good and that we could come back next weekend. when you passed on July 14th, 2004. my world was ruined, i no longer had my best friend around that i had known for about 7 years but i only really understood you for about 4 of those years. memere i know that everytime something big happens in my life or i achieve something, that you are looking down from heaven and smiling you're smile that i love and miss. i'm crying really hard as i write this. you left me to early, i never got to ask you about you're teenage years, or what you wore to you're senior prom. or what kind of music was in style. memere i see so much of you in me, and it makes me cry because i love you so much and i miss you everyday. when i give up on life and everyone in it, i look up to the beautiful sky and think, "she's up there, waiting for me, but i cannot go to early, because then she will not welcome me with loving arms". i have you're smile. (: when you're funeral came along me and mom would cry and cry and hug each other. my children will never have a great great grandmother sorta like how i never had a great grandmother. i love you memere more than you could know, i wish that you could come back to me, and just hug me. i miss you're hugs and kisses more than anything. 7. that's how old i was when i lost my best friend. i miss you everyday, you will always been in my heart memere. rest easy, i hope it's nice up there. keep smiling and keep the sun shining<3 love you, Peyton.
I sometimes wake up in the morning wishing I never would again. My house is full of screaming, lies, and I contribute to it. I just want to run away so badly from these people that I love and hate, all at the same time. I want to be erased from their lives, maybe then they'll be happy.
I draw pictures of caged birds on my homework because I want someone to know that I feel trapped inside. I cut myself because I need someone to notice that I'm here, and I hurt. but when they ask what's wrong, I make up lies to conceal my pain.
I drink because of you. I drink to forget you. I drink so it won't hurt anymore. I drink so that you will see me and realize I am having a good time without you. But mostly, I drink so that you will worry when I've had too much, hold me when I am tripping over my own feet, and comfort me when I start crying.
My friends one day were laughing at a girl they saw in the halls with cuts all up her arms. They got really upset when I told them to stop being rude & standing up for this girl. I can't imagine what they'd say if they saw my scars. sixbilliionsecrets.com
I secretly want to get into a horrible car accident because I am to scared to end my own life that I don't want to live. Also, I don't want to hurt my family and friends with my own decision. sixbillionsecrets.com
Noah: " So it's not gonna be easy. It's going to be really hard; we're gonna have to work at this everyday, but I want to do that because I want you. I want all of you, forever, everyday. You and me... everyday. " ~The Notebook<3