Witty Profiles

notamorningperson*

1. notamorningperson*
   posted a quote
   August 8, 2013 3:46pm UTC
   You have no idea how happy I get when the phone rings and it's you.
   microwave beeps and my food is ready.
   
   👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 1 point
2. notamorningperson*
   posted a quote
   August 5, 2013 4:36pm UTC
   If a dude keeps staring at your boobs and you're tired of it, just stare right at his package. Make him feel insecure. Even, like, squint your eyes a little bit.
   #GirlCode
   
   👍 this is good · read the comments · 5 points
3. notamorningperson*
   posted a quote
   February 23, 2013 12:00pm UTC
   Things I wish I could google...
   Google
   Google Search I'm Feeling Lucky
   Do you mean: Does he like me? or Where is the pencil I lost? or What is the next winning lottery number? or Will life get better?
   nmq/nmf
   
   👍 this is good · read the comments · 6 points
4. notamorningperson*
   posted a quote
   February 23, 2013 10:49am UTC
   What did the ocean say to the other ocean?
   Nothing they just waved
   Do you sea what i did there?
   I'm shore you did
   How do you have friends?
   Don't be such a beach
   
   👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 4 points
5. notamorningperson*
   posted a quote
   February 23, 2013 10:42am UTC
   Most Common Lies
   -I won't laugh, I promise
   -Your table will be ready in a few minutes
   -I'm just kidding
   -I never got your text
   -I have read and agree to the terms and conditions
   -You will need to know this later in life
   -I'm fine
   -No, I'm okay, I'm just tired
   -Okay, just five more minutes
   -I'm on my way
   -It'll just take a minute
   
   👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 7 points
6. notamorningperson*
   posted a quote
   February 22, 2013 8:04pm UTC
   Bro.
   Bros
   Broski
   Bromo
   Brotien
   Brodeo
   Brohan
   Brochill
   Brosicle
   Broseph
   Brocean
   Brotastic
   Brofessor
   Han Brolo
   Brosideon
   Bromance
   Brohemian
   Brotato chip
   Brohammad
   Brohan Solo
   Bro Montana
   Bromosexual
   Bromosapien
   Brotein Shake
   Brottontosaurus
   Abroham Lincoln
   Broack Brobama
   Brorannasaurs Rex
   
   👍 this is good · read the comments · 7 points
7. notamorningperson*
   posted a quote
   February 15, 2013 8:25pm UTC
   Well, hello Beautiful
   Wanna know something?
   I understand how some of you feel
   When you talk about
   Being too ugly, too fat, too skinny, too this, too that..
   Wanna know something though?
   Y O U A R E B E A U T I F U L.
   BEAUTIFUL. YES. YOU ARE.
   I know what you're thinking now...
   "Another one of those quotes. I'm not beautiful. I'm ugly."
   B A M
   There goes the negativity in you. The insecurities in Y O U.
   STOP THINKING LIKE THAT!
   *Rolls eyes*
   Don't let society tear you down
   Don't listen to what other people say
   When someone tells you that you're ugly
   & You believe it
   It's like somone saying, "You're a dragon and you live in a castle."
   & You believe it
   N O N S E N S E.
   Complete NONSENSE
   You're a princess
   And they are peasants
   With U G L Y hearts
   Brush your shoulders off
   Haters gonna hate &
   Potatoes gonna Potate
   So potate on, my princess potatoes.
   Potate the f*ck on.
   nmq/nmf
   
   👍 this is good · read the comments · 47 points
8. notamorningperson*
   posted a quote
   November 20, 2012 7:45pm UTC
   ALPHABET OF ME
   [A]vailable: No. But I'm single.
   [B]irthday: october 18
   [C]rush: It's complicated.
   [D]rink you last had: milk
   [E]asiest person to talk to: my crush<3
   [F]avorite genre of music: im open to anything but country and rap
   [G]ummy bears or gummy worms: Bears :3
   [H]ad your first kiss: Yep.
   [I]nstrument: the microphone;)
   [J]uice: Um. I like apple.
   [K]illed someone: With my awesomeness!
   [L]ongest trip: idk. like 14 hours to MA
   [M]ilkshake flavor: CHOCOLATE
   [N]umber of siblings: 4 sisters and 1 brother. im the runt
   [O]ne wish: to travel the world
   [P]erson who holds the best memories with you: ugggh patrick:/
   [Q]uiet or loud: Ha. Loud.
   [R]easons to smile: Nice comments on Witty&that's about it.
   [S]ong: RED BY TAYLOR SWIFT and anything lifehouse, coldplay and maroon5
   [T]ime you woke up: 6am
   [U]mbrella: Random. Um. I have a rainbow colored one
   [V]egetable: I don't like them.
   [W]arm at the moment: It's just nice.
   [X]-rays you've had: none
   [Y]our favorite animal: FREAKING GIRAFFES
   [Z]odiac sign: libra
   
   👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 1 point
9. notamorningperson*
   posted a quote
   November 17, 2012 4:33pm UTC
   Sibling Property Rules:
   1.if i like it, its mine
   2.if im holding it, its mine
   3.if i can take it from you, its mine
   4.if i had it a little while ago, its mine
   5.if im chewing something up, ALL the pieces are mine
   6.if its mine, it must never be yours anyway
   7.if it just looks like mine, its mine
   8.if i saw it first, its mine
   9.if you are playing with something, and you put it down, it automatically becomes mine
   10.if its broken, its yours:)
   
   👍 this is good · read the comments · 16 points
10. notamorningperson*
    posted a quote
    November 16, 2012 8:26pm UTC
    You asked me if I needed you;
    I replied with no.
    But in my head I whispered yes.
    You asked me if I wanted you;
    I replied with no.
    But my brain was screaming yes.
    You asked me if I loved you;
    I replied with no.
    But my heart cried out yes.
    You asked me if I was okay;
    I replied with yes.
    But this was the only time that I actually meant NO.
    nmq/nmf
    smallchick105
    
    👍 this is good · read the comments · 10 points
11. notamorningperson*
    posted a quote
    November 16, 2012 8:23pm UTC
    Dear Axe Body Spray,
    Please put a suggested serving size
    on your bottle.
    Sincerely,
    Choking girls everywhere
    
    👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 12 points
12. notamorningperson*
    posted a quote
    November 16, 2012 8:17pm UTC
    Lol So True: #148
    Dear 11 year olds with the facebook status "its complicated"... seriously, what did he do, steal your animal crackers?
    lolsotrue.com
    
    👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 16 points
13. notamorningperson*
    posted a quote
    November 16, 2012 6:11pm UTC
    I miss the time
    when I actually meant something to you
    
    👍 this is good · read the comments · 25 points
14. notamorningperson*
    posted a quote
    November 16, 2012 6:02pm UTC
    -----------------------
    Lost your pen= no pen
    no pen=no notes
    no notes= no study
    no study= fail
    fail= no diploma
    no diploma= no work
    no work= no money
    no money= no food
    no food= skinny
    skinny=ugly
    ugly=no love
    no love=no marraige
    no marriage= no children
    no children= alone
    alone=depression
    depression=sickness
    sickness= death
    ------------------------
    
    👍 this is good · read the comments · 5 points
15. notamorningperson*
    posted a quote
    November 16, 2012 5:52pm UTC
    ❤♥❤♥❤♥❤♥❤
    IF A GIRL IS SILENT, ITS DANGEROUS.
    SHE'S EITHER:
    1.over thinking
    2.tired of waiting
    3.about to blow up
    4.needs a hug
    5.falling apart
    6.crying inside
    7.ALL OF THE ABOVE
    ♥❤♥❤♥❤♥❤♥
    cookiedoughformats
    
    👍 this is good · read the comments · 200 points
16. notamorningperson*
    posted a quote
    November 16, 2012 5:47pm UTC
    Wen yew tlk liek dis,
    I want to throw a dictionary
    AT YOUR FACE.
    format by kat_formats
    
    👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 11 points
17. notamorningperson*
    posted a quote
    October 29, 2012 8:17pm UTC
    "Mephobia"
    is the fear of becoming so awesome
    that the human race can't handle it
    and everybody dies.
    
    👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 5 points
18. notamorningperson*
    posted a quote
    October 27, 2012 12:50am UTC
    I wish i could tell you I miss you. I wish you looked at me the way you used to. I wish we still texted. I just wish you could look at me. I wish you didn't have that disgusted look on your face when you see me in the hallway. I wish you wouldn't call me fat. I wish you wouldn't call me ugly. I wish you respected me. I wish you still loved me. I wish you could hold me like you used to. I wish you would smile at me. I wish you didn't care what people thought. I wish you didn't break up with me. I wish I didn't have the urge to cry every time I see you. I wish I could hold you tight. I wish we could kiss forever. I wish your friends weren't mean to me. I wish you didn't make fun of me. I wish I could tell you I love you.
    I HATE YOU
    
    👍 this is good · read the comments · 10 points
19. notamorningperson*
    posted a quote
    October 9, 2012 9:47pm UTC
    THOSE LYRICS TO THAT
    ONE SONG THAT SAY
    WHAT YOU'VE BEEN
    SCREAMING
    FOR SO LONG...
    
    👍 this is good · read the comments · 6 points
20. notamorningperson*
    posted a quote
    October 2, 2012 10:09pm UTC
    People who have all of the following;
    -tumblr, facebook, instagram, kik, keek, facetime, skype, twitter, pinterest, stumbleupon, etc...
    "OMG did you see what she just posted?????"
    Me; "Do you have a life?"
    Them; "No, where do you download it?"
    FACE PALM
    
    👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 3 points

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