Hey y'all! My name is Peyton and I am currently 17 years old and living in North Carolina. I'm a senior in high school and I have the most amazing friends. I'm a total country girl, I have horses and everything. I had a couple of other witty accounts, but will be writing mostly on this one from now on. I hope you like my quotes and talk to me if you ever need anything, I'd love to help you girls out if I can.
i made a mistake. back when i said how you were better than him, i was wrong. at least when he hurt me he didn't realize. but you see that im stuck here. and you keep it coming. why do you do this to me? so easily? you see im drowning and you're just holding me under.
Why do I do this to myself? I get more pleasure out of hitting the self destruct button than being genuinely happy. maybe thats because i havent been happy with a boy since i was with him. i dont stop him when he reaches out for me. i let him touch me. and i do the same. its like a drug. i need it to keep going but hes not the one i really want. hes a figure ive created to keep me from jumping off the deep end because i know that i would. he makes my emotions flare and boil and makes me so angry until i see him. but all the while i'm thinking of a different boy. one that i knew a long time ago. one that could make me laugh until i cried and make me feel love like never before. but this boy doesnt exist anymore. this boy changed, shifted into someone else. i don't know him anymore and he doesnt know me. im missing someone from the past not the present. and no matter how much i long for him i will never get him back. not because he doesnt want to come back, but because he cant. i cant bring him back no matter how hard i remember, no matter how hard i try.
Dear Austin, i'm sorry. i'm sorry i walked away that night and i'm sorry i let your hand fall to your side. you can't begin to imagine what was going through my mind at that moment. i think i was too much in shock to realise the oppertunity right in front of me. not many people get second chances, not to mention third chances. but i threw mine away.. for what? for another boy who couldn't care less about me. but you. you always cared. you held me when i felt like i was breaking. you showed me what it felt like to love. you wanted me unconditionally. and now i want you. i want you back. you're the only one who can fix me, who can piece me back together. we were so young back then, we deserve a chance. and this time i believe we could be something amazing. we could work. this could work. i just need to get a hold of you again. i need to kiss you. to see if it's still there. i want you. i've always wanted you. i will always want you. i still compare every boy i meet to you, which is both a curse and a blessing. but your memories make me smile when i need them most. which makes me believe that you will be there when i need you most. but austin.. i need you right now. i need you to find the stregnth to come up to me and say something. to fight for this. to fight for me. because that's all i've ever truly wanted. to be worth someone's attention. and you're all i've ever truly wanted. my one, my only.
this is me giving up. i tried and i failed, simple as that. im not going to say i regret it, because i dont. it was amazing and i can honestly say that i will always love you. i mean you were my first after all. i just dont think that its enough anymore. im not good enough to be your girlfriend but im good enough to be a friend with benefits? maybe im no better than that but i personally cant handle it emotionally anymore. now i need to find the courage to tell you what ive wanted to say for a long time now. im done. i want a relationship and you dont and thats fine, it really is. but this is just too complicated of a situation for me to continue with. and maybe we will never be able to be friends again and i know that it will break my heart every day. and i know that if you kiss another girl it'll hurt even more and ill doubt myself and maybe come crawling back but just maybe ill be happy. maybe ill find someone who really cares about me and is willing to take a chance on me. maybe they'll give me everything i've ever wanted. maybe it'll be worth it. i've loved you for a long time now and these feelings don't just go away overnight. but im starting to think that love isnt enough to keep me around anymore. you treat me like dirt and i still can't keep myself from reaching out for more. i wish you could see how much you hurt me. how much my heart has shattered because of you. but you don't and you won't. because i wont tell you and you wont look. ive been too strong for too long, and when you start to get in the way of my well-being something has to change. i dont want to turn to cutting again but i know myself well enough to know that if this continues i will. it may not end to day or this week or the next week. but it needs to end. total vent, please don't judge.
I thought we could do this, I really did. I gave you everything I possibly could and when I got nothing in return I just kept giving. I'm a stupid, stupid girl. You continue to treat me like dirt and I look at you like you're a superhero. I thought we could do this, but I guess I thought wrong.