Witty Profiles

michaelangalo

1. michaelangalo
   posted a quote
   December 8, 2013 12:36pm UTC
   who needs abs when you can have kebabs?
   
   👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 5 points
2. michaelangalo
   posted a quote
   December 8, 2013 12:32pm UTC
   FRIEND: how come gays dress so well?
   ME: they did't spend that much time in the closet for nothing.
   
   👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 1 point
3. michaelangalo
   posted a quote
   July 5, 2013 11:12pm UTC
   i.would.never.survive.a.shark.attack
   i would drown trying to find the edge of the ocean to hold onto
   
   👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 1 point
4. michaelangalo
   posted a quote
   June 24, 2013 8:47pm UTC
   Pretending to
   take a selfie
   when you are
   really taking
   a picture of
   somthing hilaious
   in front of you
   
   👍 this is good · read the comments · 11 points
5. michaelangalo
   posted a quote
   May 24, 2013 6:53am UTC
   that one teacher that you swear put the hole in the ozone layer with the amount of hairspray she uses
   
   👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 6 points
6. michaelangalo
   posted a quote
   May 21, 2013 3:30pm UTC
   *In history class*
   Teacher: malnutrion in Africa is a horibble thing, it shortens your period *pause*
   Me in my head: I AM MOVING TO AFRICA!!
   teacher: of life by many years
   
   👍 this is good · read the comments · 24 points
7. michaelangalo
   posted a quote
   May 15, 2013 3:22pm UTC
   i memorize lyrics
   not
   flashcards
   
   👍 this is good · read the comments · 5 points
8. michaelangalo
   posted a quote
   April 14, 2013 9:04am UTC
   there are a million open seats at the movie theater and the two tallest people decide to sit in front of you
   
   👍 this is good · read the comments · 7 points
9. michaelangalo
   posted a quote
   April 6, 2013 7:58am UTC
   (This is how fergie's interview went for the blackeye peas)
   interviwer: do you have any experience in singing?
   Fergie: ummm I sing in the shower every once and a while.
   interviwer: YOU'RE IN!
   
   👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 8 points
10. michaelangalo
    posted a quote
    April 3, 2013 8:58pm UTC
    my
    favirote songs
    are the ones that
    when
    i hear them,
    i put in my second
    headphone
    
    👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 4 points
11. michaelangalo
    posted a quote
    March 30, 2013 9:30pm UTC
    if
    i
    cant
    even
    keep
    my
    balance
    now
    then
    say
    goodbye
    to
    all
    your
    surronding
    items
    when
    i am
    DRUNK
    
    👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 5 points
12. michaelangalo
    posted a quote
    February 8, 2013 4:06pm UTC
    NEVER once WHILE watching SPONGEBOB did I think IT was weird THAT a snail WAS meowing
    
    👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 3 points
13. michaelangalo
    posted a quote
    January 29, 2013 5:32pm UTC
    *texting someone*
    them: hey
    me: hi
    them: whats up
    me: the celling
    them:
    me:
    them:
    me:
    them: what?
    
    👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 4 points
14. michaelangalo
    posted a quote
    January 28, 2013 4:04pm UTC
    you can try but you will never forget
    her name
    my dad should really consider meeting this "girl on fire"
    
    👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 2 points
15. michaelangalo
    posted a quote
    January 28, 2013 3:56pm UTC
    Did you know
    Think it's cute when guys are good with kids?
    that you sound absoulutly adorable with a stuffy nose
    
    👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 2 points
16. michaelangalo
    posted a quote
    January 17, 2013 9:23pm UTC
    people are sooo ruining
    the concept of fuzzy socks
    by putting that sticky crap on the bottom
    you are suppose to slip everywhere thats the point
    
    👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 4 points
17. michaelangalo
    posted a quote
    July 16, 2012 2:48pm UTC
    that awkward moment
    awhen you butt dial someone when you're talkining about them behind their back. ♥
    
    👍 this is good · read the comments · 6 points
18. michaelangalo
    posted a quote
    July 15, 2012 7:25pm UTC
    the annoying moment when
    you type in a really long google search and look up to find that you havent even clicked on the search bar yet
    
    👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 2 points
19. michaelangalo
    posted a quote
    July 5, 2012 5:03pm UTC
    MY DAD,
    HE CAN DESIGN AN ENGIENE FOR A PLANE BUT CANT FIGURE OUT HOW TO SEND A TEXT
    
    👍 this is good · read the comments · 10 points
20. michaelangalo
    posted a quote
    July 5, 2012 5:00pm UTC
    when the phone rings i always wait untill the second ring so the caller dosent think that i sit by the phone all day and wait for someone to call me
    
    👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 5 points

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