Witty Profiles

kaywee27

1. kaywee27
   posted a quote
   November 18, 2012 6:48pm UTC
   Me: I want a boyfriend who will take me to concerts.
   Me: or a boyfriend.
   Me: or concert tickets.
   Me: or concert tickets to see my boyfriend.
   
   👍 this is good · read the comments · 568 points
2. kaywee27
   posted a quote
   November 7, 2012 7:01pm UTC
   Mitt Romney: I would have gotten away with it too if it weren't for that medling Obama!
   Mitt Romney: and minorities.
   Mitt Romney: ang gays.
   Mitt Romney: and women.
   Mitt Romney: and birth control
   
   👍 this is good · read the comments · 95 points
3. kaywee27
   posted a quote
   November 6, 2012 7:41pm UTC
   Things seemed to be going just fine.
   With a sign on my back saying kick me,
   reality ruined my life.
   
   👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 3 points
4. kaywee27
   posted a quote
   October 27, 2012 8:12pm UTC
   am i the only one who didn't know that Cole Sprouse had a tumblr..
   
   👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 1 point
5. kaywee27
   posted a quote
   October 20, 2012 6:02pm UTC
   BravoSierra's format
   she locked herself in the cellar,
   listened to the screaming of the wind.
   
   👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 2 points
6. kaywee27
   posted a quote
   October 19, 2012 3:30pm UTC
   If Your Life Was A Movie;
   What would the soundtrack be?
   ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
   So here's how it works:
   1.) Open your library (iTunes, Media Player, all the rest...)
   2.) Put it on shuffle
   3.) Press play
   4.) For every question, type the song that's playing
   5.) When you go to a new question, press the next button
   ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
   Opening Credits: Anywhere But Here ~ Mayday Parade
   Waking up: Do the John Wall ~ Troop 41
   First day of school: Crash & Burn ~ Jesse McCartney
   Falling in love: Forever ~ Chris Brown
   Breaking up: Leavin' ~ Jesse McCartney
   Studying/Working: She Don't Like The Lights ~ Justin Bieber
   Life: Blackout ~ Breathe Carolina
   Mental breakdown: You Need Me, I Don't Need You ~ Ed Sheeran
   Sunny Day: We Are Young ~ Fun.
   Rainy Day: Don't Look Now ~ Far East Movement & Keri Hilson
   Party Music: Dirty Dancer ~ Enrique Inglesias with Usher feat. Lil Wayne
   Driving: Boyfriend ~ Justin Bieber
   Sleeping: Sunday Morning ~ Maroon 5
   Nightmares: We Love Like Vampires ~ Sparks the Rescue
   Flashback: Moments ~ One Direction
   Wedding: As Long As You Love Me ~ Justin Bieber
   Birth of child: Get Some ~ Blake Shelton
   Final Battle: Die In Your Arms ~ Justin Bieber
   Funeral Song: I Know You're Gonna Be There ~ Luke Bryan
   Death Scene: Stay ~ Mayday Parade
   End Credits: Save You Tonight ~ One Direction
   
   👍 this is good · read the comments · 1 point
7. kaywee27
   posted a quote
   October 16, 2012 9:26pm UTC
   click to see this quote
   
   👍 this is good · read the comments · 3 points
8. kaywee27
   posted a quote
   October 10, 2012 7:08pm UTC
   So I was on tumblr and I saw a picture of this guy. vvvv
   http://cat-tastr0phe.tumblr.com/post/33301209358/sweet-mother-of-god
   At first I was like, "Wow, another flawless tumblr guy fml."
   And then I looked closer.
   "I know this face."
   Closer.
   CLOSER.
   And then I realized it was DYLAN SPROUSE and I was like
   "iasjdiofjiaojdgifojOIAJFDGOIJRE2993923904KSDZFJVI WHAT."
   Where has my childhood gone and when did it become irresistable sexy.
   
   👍 this is good · read the comments · 5 points
9. kaywee27
   posted a quote
   September 22, 2012 4:17pm UTC
   4 year old sister logic
   Her: why
   Me: i don't know
   Her: why
   Me: *coughs*
   Her: are you sick?
   Me: yes
   Her: why
   Me: *has coughing attack*
   Her: why are you coughing
   Me: don't do that you'll get hurt!
   Her: why
   Me: i'm hungry.
   Her: why
   Me: this spoon is broken.
   Her: why
   Me: Go get dad!
   Her: why
   Me: Because I just cut my finger open!
   Her: why
   Me: The knife slipped, go get dad!
   Her: why
   Me: BECAUSE YOUR ONLY SISTER IS GOING TO BLEED TO DEATH
   Her: why.
   Me: for real.
   Her: why.
   Me: I'm going to light your toys on fire.
   Her: why.
   Me: because all you know how to say is why.
   Her: why.
   Me: omfg goodbye.
   Her: I'll light your One Direction posters on fire if you light my toys on fire.
   Me:
   Mom:
   Dad:
   Brother:
   Cat:
   Harry Styles:
   Niall Horan:
   Liam Payne:
   Zayn Malik:
   Louis Tomlinson:
   Carrot:
   Chicken:
   Me: why.
   
   👍 this is good · read the comments · 713 points
10. kaywee27
    posted a quote
    September 22, 2012 12:17pm UTC
    That moment when you're scrolling through top quotes
    And you see one and you're like
    "Hey that looks familiar."
    and then you're like
    "HEY WAIT THAT'S MINE!!!!!11!!! ASDFGHJKL235SDYRHJK;;"
    seriously i love everyone on the website. whether you know it or not, you all make my day every day.
    
    👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 24 points
11. kaywee27
    posted a quote
    September 21, 2012 3:34pm UTC
    Plot twist: Liam sings about inappropriate things.
    Plot twist: Niall is the only one with his shirt off.
    Plot twist: Zayn is hyper in a music video.
    Plot twist: Harry isn't lead the entire time.
    Plot twist: Louis is in more than 25 seconds of the video.
    OH WAIT.
    
    👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 284 points
12. kaywee27
    posted a quote
    September 17, 2012 4:54pm UTC
    You looked gorgeous today. :)
    Are you kidding? I'm sick, I feel like crap, I barely put any makeup on and I just grabbed the first sweatshirt I could out of my closet...
    And yet you still looked amazing.
    Let me love you.
    
    👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 11 points
13. kaywee27
    posted a quote
    September 16, 2012 6:20pm UTC
    Leave it to me too
    completely miss the paper and cut myself with the scissors.
    
    👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 23 points
14. kaywee27
    posted a quote
    September 4, 2012 3:51pm UTC
    i just want to call someone mine.
    is that too much to ask?
    
    👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 2 points
15. kaywee27
    posted a quote
    September 3, 2012 1:38am UTC
    I stay up late for no reason.
    
    👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 8 points
16. kaywee27
    posted a quote
    September 2, 2012 5:58pm UTC
    On the first day of school
    Me: wow I forgot how much I hate the sound of my alarm.
    Me: wow I forgot how much I hate getting up this early.
    Me: wow I forgot how much I hate doing my hair.
    Me: wow I forgot how much I hate the bus.
    Me: wow I forgot how much I hate everyone.
    
    👍 this is good · read the comments · 55 points
17. kaywee27
    posted a quote
    August 28, 2012 12:37am UTC
    Can someone please tell me
    why all the good guys are either famous or fictional.
    
    👍 this is good · read the comments · 10 points
18. kaywee27
    posted a quote
    August 24, 2012 12:07am UTC
    click to see this quote
    
    👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 2 points
19. kaywee27
    posted a quote
    August 23, 2012 7:27pm UTC
    One Direction: Are you ready for the big announcement?!
    Me: YEEEEEEES!
    One Direction: Are you sure?
    Me: YES YES YES!
    One Direction: Well you have to wait until tomorrow.
    Me: Okay fine.
    *this morning*
    Me: THE ANNOUNCEMENT ASDFGHJKL;
    One Direction: Our new single is called Live While We're Young! And it drops tonight at midnight! And our album comes out in November!
    Me: Oh. My. God.
    *commencing a full day of fangirling, buying iTunes money for the single, and more fangirling.*
    *literally 10 hours later after basically crying over this news*
    One Direction: Oh, but you Directioners in the US can't buy it until October first. WE LOVE YOU GUYS! XXXXXXX
    Me:
    Me:
    Me:
    Me:
    Dog:
    Cat:
    Obama:
    Miley Cyrus:.
    Justin Bieber:
    Grass:
    Spork:
    Pigeon:
    Asparagus:
    Entire country of the United States of America:
    Me: Are you FU/CKING KIDDING ME.
    UK: Lol @ ur lyfe.
    
    👍 this is good · read the comments · 24 points
20. kaywee27
    posted a quote
    August 19, 2012 12:31am UTC
    One particle of unobtanium has a nuclear reaction with the flux compacitor, carry the two, changing it's atomic isotope into a radioactive spider.
    F/CK YOU SCIENCE.
    -21 Jump Street.
    
    👍 this is good · read the comments · 4 points

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