Read it or not I dont care anymore Im not doing this for attention or for likes, I just want you to know the story of me, my life and how such a normal girl can be empty inside
Is It just me or does it just bother me that sometime my family just takes things way to far that sometimes I even feel like taking my own life, I cant even have a normal conversation with them and its sad because I just wanna leave this world, and last night I finally told someone anout my suicdal situations, Ive been suicdal for a long time now and Ive tried so hard to stay in this world but I dont know anymore Im confused and everything Im fortunate to have a okay family, but they just dont know when to stop joking around, Ive been the one whos always been picked on, I guess this is why Im an emotional wreck, and they just dont understand what its like to be a teen in this time and day. I absolutly hate it, lately ive been crying myself to sleep, not eating lately. Ive been becoming aneroxic and no one has noticed, and Ive gone through suicdal, and depression and ive even gone so far to even cut myself and no one has ever noticed anything wrong with me. I spend my days in my room in the dark sleeping just to escape reality I dont know if this world is for me. Im just going through a rough, and very rough time. Ive even been bullied at school during my middle school years and thats all over for now i guess. I dont know if I wanna live in this world anymore its been such a rocky road and sometimes I wanna slap my sister for being so immmature and stuff and shes older in her late 20's and it bothers me because I cant have a normal life. I write everything down about my life. And this time Im not sure to continue my journey, I dont know if I wanna live anymore and No one ever pays attention to me, Ive never once heard my parents say to me "I love you" Im pretty much a spoiled child. I feel like they try to buy my happiness and thats not working because inside I feel empty like No accomplishments have ever been done. I wanna leave, I wanna leave this world to escape this emptyness and such. I dont know everyone around me sees me as a normal teen age girl with no problems, I was once the most popular person in my school, I was once pretty. But today I feel like nothing i feel worthless of my life. Id rather be poor and have loving parents who try their best to raise the best little girl they can raise but instead I have parents who try to buy my happiness. Sad right. I hate it, I cry myself every almost every single night. its sad because they dont know what its like to be me. trust me. Even the most prettiest, popular person can be the most empty person in the world with nothing. I absoluty hate this. I guess that my words speak through my drawings through life. Ive had many things accomplished in my life. Im a track star at my school and I have so many medals and i dont know anymore its not important to me anymore but i dont know. I wanna leave leave this world now. people who are poor are often the most kindest and one day I wanna grow up to be an amazing woman but I dont know if this little girl inside can survive this world. I dont know , I wanna give up i wanna leave everything behind and just leave and see if anyone notices. I wish I can leave. Leave this world. Leave the pain behind, Leave the saddness behind. I dont wanna cry myself to sleep, I dont know. I just dont know anymore
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