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glitterandnightmares

ThatsSoMeee
posted a quote
January 12, 2013 4:36pm UTC

I want a boy
who would shove ice cream in my face.
Who will wrestle with me.
Who shows me off to his friends.
Who treats me with respect.
Who will call me at 4 in the morning
and tell me he can’t stop thinking about me.
Who sings to me; even if he can’t.
Who could break my heart,
but wouldn’t even dream of it.

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BlackUmbrella
posted a quote
December 30, 2012 12:17pm UTC

person is typing...
person is typing...
person is typing...
person is typing...
person is typing...
person is typing...
person is typing...
person is typing...
person is typing...
person says... hi
PLOT TWIST: That person is confessing their undying love to you; spilling their guts and finally getting the courage to tell you how you feel. Then they think, delete it all and type in that one word.

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hermione23katniss
posted a quote
November 17, 2012 2:50pm UTC

What people consider a "snack": Animal crackers and a juice box
What I consider a "snack": 2 four topping pizzas, a can of coke, a birthday cake, 3 jars of nutella, a gallon of ice cream, creme brulee from france, 4 donuts, and a pie.

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LegendaryLettuce
posted a quote
November 28, 2012 3:48pm UTC

On the 12th day of christmas Facebook came to me....
12 dudes Im blocking
11 friends just waiting
10 corny topics
9 busted barbies
8 friends complaining
7 stalkers stalking
6 party invites
5 DRAMAAA QUEEENS
4 game requests
3 photo tags
2 people pokes
AND A CREEP WHO WONT STOP INBOXING MEEE!
Merry early christmas everyone.

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MissTomlinson
posted a quote
November 20, 2012 5:13pm UTC

click to see this quote

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glitterandnightmares
posted a quote
December 9, 2012 2:42pm UTC

Me: hey, i like your shirt
Them: thanks, i got it for seventy dollars at a department store
Me: really? because for seventy dollars at Burlington, i got the same shirt, three lamps, cashmere underwear, a golden retriever and two Puerto Rican children

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ambear24
posted a quote
September 23, 2012 12:55pm UTC

how awkward am i?
last night, my boyfriend and i were cuddling on the couch.
i got cold and rolled up into a ball.
and then i blurt out,
"check it out. i'm an armadillo."

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Ineedmakyinme
posted a quote
September 27, 2012 3:30pm UTC

Dear 'boyfriend';
Application For Permission To Date My Daughter
Note: Please be prepared to submit additional information e.g. psychological profile, DNA samples and admission to polygraph exam.
1. Name:______________________________________ Date of Birth __/__/____
2.Height: __ft__in. Weight: ___Lbs. I.Q: __ GPA: __
3.Social Security Number: ___-___-____ Drivers License: State: _______ Number: _____________
4.Home address____________________ City: _____________ State_____
5: Boy Scout Rank: _________________
6.How fast can you run 40 yards: ____sec. Two Miles: ___min.
7.Church you attend: ___________________ How Often? _____________________
8.In 50 words or less, Explan what "DONT TOUCH MY DAUGHTER" means to you:
_____________________________________________________________________________________.
9. In 50 words or less, Explain what "Late" means to you:
____________________________________________________________________________________.
10. Complete the following sentences:
a) If I were to be shot, the last place I would want to be shot is in the __________.
b) If I were to be beaten, the last bone I would want to have broken is ___________.
c) The one thing I hope this Application does not as is________________________________________.
d) In the unfortunate event of my untimely death, I would like my ashes scattered ___________________.
e)My greatest fear is____________________________.
11. What do you want me be if you grow up?_________________________________________.
12.How you ever been fingerprinted? Yes___ No___
13. Do you have any identifying marks? e.g. birth marks,scars, tattoos Yes___ No___
14.My dentist is __________________________________ City:_______________ State:______________
I hereby swear that all the information supplied above is true and correct to the best of my knowledge under penalty of Deah and or Dismemberment.
Signed:____________________________________
Thank you for your interest! Please allow 4-6 years for processing. You will be contacted in writing if you are approved. Please do not call, write or E-mail. Any attempts at contact during the processing of this application could be hazardous to your health and/or cause serious personal injury.
Sincerely,
Daddy's Orders

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ThatsSoMeee
posted a quote
September 26, 2012 4:30pm UTC

One day
you’ll meet a guy.
And ultimately, he’s going to find out.
How you chew, how you sip,
how you dance, how you smell at every point in the day.
How your face looks underneath all your makeup.
How you love chocolate, how you can be hyper at times,
how certain games and shows make you really happy.
How cranky you can get when you’re tired,
how you think you look bad in all your photos.
He’s going to know everything about you.
And you know what?
He’s still going to love you.

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Peace1231
posted a quote
September 2, 2012 8:14pm UTC

I find it hilarious when
I go on facebook and see
A girl who just posted a new profile picture & in it she's smiling really innocently pretending that she has no idea that her boobs are literally inches from exploding out of her shirt.

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ThatsSoMeee
posted a quote
September 2, 2012 3:40pm UTC

Boys say they like natural girls
But honestly,
if there’s two girls walking down the street,
one with nice smokey eyes
and a classy red lipstick
and another with shoved up hair and no makeup;
you’re going to be looking at the one
who made an effort ..
and if boys do prefer natural girls,
why is it always the girls who wear the most makeup
who actually get the boyfriends?

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Peace1231
posted a quote
August 27, 2012 10:47am UTC

Yahoo! Answers
Resolved Question
I am pretending that I am dead? Help...?
Hey guys my name is Courtney and i am 17.
So there is this girl i hate named Jane who had a big party and I went. We got into a huge argument and I left and went into the backyard to get away from her. She followed me outside and was arguing with me and stuff and then out of nowhere she pushed me so hard! She grabbed me and tried to take me down on the ground and she climbed on top of me and was choking me and smashing me onto the ground.
I pretended I was unconscious and she was freaking out.
she picked me up and started dragging me even though I was awake. I was just pretending to be unconscious.
I peeked and saw she was dragging me towards the pool! I took a huge breathe and she held up my body besides the water and she threw me into the pool! I did the dead mans float and I held my breathe as long as a could then I turned around to breathe and Jane was gone
I heard her coming back so I quickly started floating again and then someone grabbed my leg and pulled me out of the water it was Jane and her boyfriend, I kept pretending to be unconscious. Jane said she threw me in the water to get off any evidence that was on me. She said I was in the water for about 10 minutes so i'm probably dead and she checked my pulse and I kept pretending I was unconscious and that IDIOT couldn't find anything and assumed I was dead
I saw my cell phone on the ground. It fell out of my pocket before Jane threw me into the pool. they left for a second so I turned on the voice recorder and I put the phone in my pocket. they dragged me across the grass around the front of the house and then they lifted me up and took me up stairs and put me in the closet in Jane's room
when they left i got out and dried myself off and i didn't leave any clues behind. i climbed out of Jane's window and went home,
help! wat should i do?!
.......................................................................................................................................
Lol wtf just happend...
format credit jimmy365

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xHello
posted a quote
August 16, 2012 12:10pm UTC

Hoodies. Flushed cheeks. Crisp air.
Hot Cocoa. Crunching leaves. Boots.
Jeans. Cuddling.
I l i v e f o r f a l l .

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juliebrat99
posted a quote
August 18, 2012 7:04pm UTC

a dozen roses: $12
a box of chocolates: $10
a happy valentines card: $2
still having $24 because you're single: priceless.

👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 892 points

YouKillMeInAGoodWay
posted a quote
August 14, 2012 10:05pm UTC

(I was at the store today and a little boy came up too me)
Him; Can you help me find my mommy?
Me; Sure I can. What does she look like?
Him; She's tall and has black hair.
(Walk around for ten mintues then we found his mother)
His mom; Thank you for finding him. -She says smiling-
Me; It's no problem, have a great rest of the day. -start to walk away and I hear him talk to his mom-
(Boy to his mom)
His mom; Why did you run off like that?
Him; She caught my eye.
Then I walk off smiling, this HONESTLY happened and made my life.<3

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Screaming
posted a quote
August 14, 2012 12:35pm UTC

"Somebody's cranky."
"Somebody needs to shut up."
♥

👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 852 points

Terilyn
posted a quote
August 17, 2012 7:03pm UTC

Me: Mom these are the Vans i want to get. *shows her le vans on my laptop*
My Mom: *grabs the laptop and looks at them* Those are cute! We'll get them this weekend.
My Mom: *starts looking at my other tabs* Look, Alex liked your photo on Facebook!
Me: Yes I know. Can you give me my compu-
My Mom: Oooh! What's Wittyprofiles?
Me: MOM I'M PREGNANT!
My Mom:
Me:
Witty:
Voldemort:
Josh Hutcherson:
Canada:
Me: haha. uh. APRIL FOOL'S.
My Mom: But it's not Apr-
Me: Ha. I know it's not.. Silly Billy. ha. bye mom. i have to go.. wash the cat. Pip Pip Doodley Doo! *grabs the laptop and runs*
My Mom: *yells after me* We don't have cat!
Me: PIP. PIP. DOODLEY. DOO.

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AwesomeUsername
posted a quote
August 13, 2012 9:06pm UTC

My guy friend almost got into a fight at Wal-Mart 'cause this kid thought he was funny in front of his friends:
Kid: Nice V-neck. Looks like my sister's.
My friend: Oh, I'm sorry. Must've put on the wrong shirt after I f/cked her.

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ThatsSoMeee
posted a quote
August 19, 2012 4:03pm UTC

Pick her up
and pretend you're going to throw her in the pool.
She'll scream and fight you,
but secretly, she'll love it.
Hold her hand while you talk.
Hold her hand when you drive.
Just hold her hand.
Tell her she looks pretty.
Look her in the eyes when you talk to her.
Protect her.
Tell her stupid jokes.
Tickle her, even when she says stop.
When she starts swearing at you, tell her you love her.
Let her fall asleep in your arms.
Get her mad, then kiss her.
Tease her and let her tease you back.
Kiss her on the cheek.
Kiss her on the forehead.
Just kiss her.
Let her wear your clothes.
Go slow.
Don't push anything.
When you fall in love with her, tell her.

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toriewashurr
posted a quote
August 16, 2012 4:19pm UTC

\
Yes, I'm a girl.
No, I don't believe all guys are the same. No, I don't believe that it's always the guys fault. No, I don't always go after jerks.
Yes, I'm that kind of girl and I do exist.

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glitterandnightmares