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dooosh

  1. dooosh dooosh
    posted a quote
    February 27, 2013 7:18pm UTC
    Yesterday I saw something that reminded me of you. I almost stepped in it

  2. dooosh dooosh
    posted a quote
    February 26, 2013 8:27pm UTC
    When someone looks over my shoulder while I'm on the computer, I open up a new tab and start searching, "HOW TO KILL THE PERSON BEHIND ME."

  3. dooosh dooosh
    posted a quote
    February 21, 2013 8:52pm UTC
    I knew a man who owned a taser...
    he was stunning!

  4. dooosh dooosh
    posted a quote
    February 21, 2013 8:48pm UTC
    If I had a time machine, I'd just keep going back every 8-9 hours so I could sleep more.

  5. dooosh dooosh
    posted a quote
    February 21, 2013 7:48pm UTC
    I hate, it when, people, overuse commas.

  6. dooosh dooosh
    posted a quote
    February 21, 2013 6:21pm UTC
    At school people used to call me "octopus girl" because I was born with eight legs.

  7. dooosh dooosh
    posted a quote
    January 14, 2013 5:21pm UTC
    You know those bugs that fly into your windshield? Those were the married ones.

  8. dooosh dooosh
    posted a quote
    January 13, 2013 4:14pm UTC
    Just because you've had a lot of lovers doesn't automatically mean you're an ideal one.

  9. dooosh dooosh
    posted a quote
    January 13, 2013 6:22am UTC
    A wise man once said........................... nothing.
    He just let her vent

  10. dooosh dooosh
    posted a quote
    January 13, 2013 5:47am UTC
    The spider in my shower was probably relieved to get washed down the drain after the view of me he got from that angle

  11. dooosh dooosh
    posted a quote
    January 1, 2013 11:45am UTC
    I got a call from my boss today saying I'm off work for a while. Which I thought was great news, until I phoned him 7 months later to realise what he really meant.

  12. dooosh dooosh
    posted a quote
    January 1, 2013 11:43am UTC
    Some guy just rang my doorbell.
    I answered it and he said, "I've got one question and one question only. On a scale of 1-10 how impatient are.."
    Then I slammed the door in his face.

  13. dooosh dooosh
    posted a quote
    January 1, 2013 11:37am UTC
    How do you add/change the song on your profile on this new layout? I'm about as confused as a blind guard dog in a maze.

  14. dooosh dooosh
    posted a quote
    December 31, 2012 1:33pm UTC
    click to see this quote

  15. dooosh dooosh
    posted a quote
    December 28, 2012 1:24pm UTC
    If I had $1 for every time someone called me good-looking, I would have exactly $1.
    Thanks Mum.

  16. dooosh dooosh
    posted a quote
    December 8, 2012 8:28am UTC
    Read a story about a man who was killed by a wave...
    All I can think is, how big was the other guy's hand?

  17. dooosh dooosh
    posted a quote
    December 7, 2012 10:28am UTC
    "IT'S THE POLICE. OPEN THE DOOR."
    "Say please..you rude c^nt!"

  18. dooosh dooosh
    posted a quote
    December 7, 2012 8:25am UTC
    Someone told me: Don't fall in love, you might get hurt. I said: Don't live, you might die.

  19. dooosh dooosh
    posted a quote
    December 5, 2012 6:21pm UTC
    People who get offended on the internet are the same people that take mini golf seriously.

  20. dooosh dooosh
    posted a quote
    December 5, 2012 11:11am UTC
    6 out of 10 people struggle with Maths. That's around 45%!

:)

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