deefw427's Favorites

MissyLizzie
posted a quote
September 7, 2012 1:32pm UTC

Plot twist: After reading all of our quotes, Steve wants teenage girls so he can show them our quote and tell them that although we all have problems, we are all perfect in our own special way.

👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 15 points

germanchick99
posted a quote
September 7, 2012 1:33pm UTC

click to see this quote

👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 19 points

PixieDustx
posted a quote
September 7, 2012 1:38pm UTC

credittorunningislife
*Walking home from school*
Friend: *shows me the cross he drew on his hand*
Friend: I'm a Christian
Me: *looks down at the 'W' written on my hand*
Me: *thinking to myself*
Me: Well I'm a Wittian ;D

👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 16 points

MyNamesMaryn
posted a quote
September 7, 2012 1:39pm UTC

My boyfriend does this thing
where he doesn't know I'm his girlfriend.
IT'S SO CUTE(:

👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 39 points

deefw427
posted a quote
September 7, 2012 1:42pm UTC

seeing a diffrent format on witty and thinking
"guys,guys,guys...i think i broke witty..."
♥

👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 4 points

MissyLizzie
posted a quote
September 7, 2012 1:30pm UTC

Plot twist: Steve is actually a teenage girl.

👍 this is good · read the comments · 106 points

keepcalmlovelife
posted a quote
September 7, 2012 12:39pm UTC

Why being a girl isn't working out for me:
Body: Oh, guess what time of the month it is!!
Me: Please, no-
Ovaries: ALL SYSTEMS GOOOOOOOOO!
Brain: I quit. I quit. Kittens and cupcakes and no one loves me. Oh my gosh. Salty snacks. I am furious.
Me: Please, guys, calm down-
Face: TIME TO RUIN EVERYTHING YOU HAVE EVER LIKED ABOUT ME. I'M GROWING MOUNTAINS.
Brain: And now I'm ugly! asdfghjkl;
Torso:...
Time to practice labor. Cramp this mess up! Let's GO GO GO GO GO.
Me: STOP IT FOR THE LOVE OF GOD.
Stomach: Lol, clothes can't fit you anymore. You are bloated. You are now a ballooooooooon!
Me: I hate you all.
Brain: I KNOW EVERYONE HATES ME. I'M SO DEPRESSED. We need to procreate.
Face: Lol. I'm not done yet.
Uterus: What did I ever do to deserve this?
Brain: You just wait uterus. They're going to make you carry a baby for like 9 months straight.
Uterus: You bastards.
Torso: CONTRACT!
Me: I quit being female. I am now a llama.
Brain: Me gusta.
nmq

👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 6 points

smallvictoria1
posted a quote
September 7, 2012 1:18pm UTC

B/tch;
You're speaking during my favorite part of this song, and that makes me homicidal.
nmf/nmq

👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 15 points

MyNamesMaryn
posted a quote
September 7, 2012 1:25pm UTC

I wanna be the girl who... #1
He gives his hoodie to <3
like for series
(mq/mf)

👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 18 points

keepcalmlovelife
posted a quote
September 7, 2012 12:54pm UTC

No I don't want to
Your dogs birthday party ///+
» ... Freak ♥
( ( ( My cat is getting married that ) ) )
WeeKend

👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 34 points

Colton_19
posted a quote
September 7, 2012 12:25pm UTC

Me: "Sometimes I talk to myself"
Me: "So do I"

👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 41 points

Colton_19
posted a quote
September 7, 2012 12:33pm UTC

The iPhone 5 better be waterproof, fireproof, crackproof, dirtproof, bulletproof, and be able to charge itself and cook for me.

👍 this is good · read the comments · 44 points

ImmaBeWitty
posted a quote
September 4, 2012 9:22am UTC

whenever someone says,
"YOU MADE MY DAY!"
» it makes my day.

👍 this is good · read the comments · 62 points

ImmaBeWitty
posted a quote
September 4, 2012 5:56pm UTC

I hate no being able to
NEATLY REMOVE THE STICKER FROM SOMETHING NEW.
format by br0kenwings

👍 this is good · read the comments · 258 points

ImmaBeWitty
posted a quote
September 4, 2012 6:08pm UTC

You Know I'm so romantic,
SOMETIMES I THINK I SHOULD MARRY MYSELF.

👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 28 points

ImmaBeWitty
posted a quote
September 6, 2012 3:41pm UTC

Is "fat" really the worst thing a human can be?
Is 'fat' REALLY worse than 'vindictive', 'jealous', 'shallow', 'vain', or 'cruel'?
not to me, It Isn't
-J.K Rowling

👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 42 points

ivelz17
posted a quote
August 13, 2012 5:58pm UTC

Pickup lines for old people.
Old man: hey baby you better call life alert cuz i've fallen for you and i can't get up
nmq

👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 20 points

RachelNorton
posted a quote
August 13, 2012 5:42pm UTC

Being popular on
Witty Profiles
is like sitting at the
cool table in a cafeteria at a
MENTAL HOSPITAL
♥♥♥

👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 92 points

lea_warren
posted a quote
August 13, 2012 5:35pm UTC

That awkward
moment between your
birth and your death.

👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 48 points

l0v3lyeyes_
posted a quote
August 13, 2012 5:06pm UTC

When you get mad at someone and swears are all you know
"JUST LOOK AT THE F*CKING B/TCH. . WHO THE HELL DOES SHE THINK SHE F*CKING IS, EATING HER GOD DAMNN SANDWICH LIKE SHE F*CKING OWNS THE F*CKING PLACE"

👍 this is good · read the comments · 250 points