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___Cryptic___

  1. Rajsonkar Rajsonkar
    posted a quote
    April 21, 2014 7:21pm EDT
    Everyone is beautiful in their own
    way.. Sometimes it just takes the right
    type of photo editing app to see it
    format credit rajsonkar

  2. BlackUmbrella BlackUmbrella
    posted a quote
    December 30, 2012 12:17pm EST
    person is typing...
    person is typing...
    person is typing...
    person is typing...
    person is typing...
    person is typing...
    person is typing...
    person is typing...
    person is typing...
    person says... hi
    PLOT TWIST: That person is confessing their undying love to you; spilling their guts and finally getting the courage to tell you how you feel. Then they think, delete it all and type in that one word.

  3. sammy* sammy*
    posted a quote
    December 23, 2012 7:44pm EST
    Pants without pockets: why
    Pants with fake pockets: okay now you're just being rude

  4. Hale_Storm18 Hale_Storm18
    posted a quote
    December 23, 2012 11:04am EST
    I use jokes from Witty in real life,
    and my friends thiink I'm some kind of comedic genius.

  5. Connork11 Connork11
    posted a quote
    January 15, 2013 4:21pm EST
    "It's not that cold out!" Said the P.E teacher with a coat on
    "It's just drizzling!" Said the P.E teach with an umbrella
    "Running for 20 minutes isn't that bad!" Said the P.E teacher sitting in a chair
    "You've got to stay healthy!" Said the P.E teacher that is over-weight
    "Being on your period is no excuse!" Said the P.E teacher with no unterus.
    NMQ

  6. Cammie Cammie
    posted a quote
    November 1, 2013 10:19pm EDT
    *pokes my responsibilities with a stick*
    what is this get it away from me

  7. Hale_Storm18 Hale_Storm18
    posted a quote
    October 22, 2013 3:00pm EDT
    me in class:
    wait what happened
    what do we do
    what do we write
    when's the test
    what is this
    how do you do this
    what

  8. CharliesTheName CharliesTheName
    posted a quote
    October 30, 2013 8:30pm EDT
    In math class today
    Teacher: Let's do a geometry throwback.
    Teacher: How many degrees does a right angle have?
    Student: Easy! 180 degrees
    Teacher: What.
    Every other student: What?
    Student:
    Student:
    Student: I'm going to go cry in the corner.
    Student: *runs into the corner*
    Teacher: Is it hot over there?
    Student: No, why?
    Teacher: Because it should be about 90 degrees in that corner.
    ba dum tsssss

  9. Hale_Storm18 Hale_Storm18
    posted a quote
    November 10, 2013 6:53pm EST
    my bio teacher was telling my class that a lot of the traits we find attractive
    in the opposite are the traits that would be best for our children and when we kiss someone and don't feel a spark it's because our DNA is too similar and isn't biology cool?

  10. happiest* happiest*
    posted a quote
    November 10, 2013 1:46pm EST
    if you gave me $1000 to spend I would still click lowest to highest price

  11. happiest* happiest*
    posted a quote
    October 29, 2013 2:43pm EDT
    THE WORST KIND OF PEOPLE IN THIS WORLD ARE THE PEOPLE WHO NOTICE WHEN YOU’RE EMBARRASSED AND BLURT OUT “YOU’RE BLUSHING” LIKE YES IM EMBARRASSED THANK YOU FOR POINTING IT OUT TO EVERYONE YOU PIECE OF SH-T

  12. happiest* happiest*
    posted a quote
    November 7, 2013 2:10pm EST
    me: Oh god it's time to get up.
    me: ugh clothing
    me: Ugh hair
    me: oh well it's too late to eat breakfast.
    me: oh god I hate this place
    me: no I don't like you leave me alone
    me: Oh your boyfriend broke up with you? Please tell me more about how emotionaly unstable you are.
    me: DON'T STOP IN THE MIDDLE OF THE DAMN HALLWAY
    me: Nice azz
    me: the f-ck you lookin at?
    me: I wonder what would happen if I pushed this kid down the stairs.
    me: Please just shut up
    me: YES HOME
    me: YES INTERNET
    me: YES BED

  13. Hale_Storm18 Hale_Storm18
    posted a quote
    October 28, 2013 9:04pm EDT
    i'm sorry if i've ever told you the same story twice. it's just that i don't have an interesting life and cool things rarely happen to me.

  14. Hale_Storm18 Hale_Storm18
    posted a quote
    October 28, 2013 9:09pm EDT
    on the bright side, i'm not addicted to cocaine yet

  15. ChocoTaco ChocoTaco
    posted a quote
    November 8, 2013 6:53pm EST
    *12-year-old white girl voice*
    "But like I'm so depressed because I'm so socially awkies. And like I'm never getting a best friend. Only cats love me. I like knitting and starbucks. And idk what a boyfriend is lol. Don't judge me haters. Tumblr is my life xD. hahahaha what is air? NUTELLLAAAAA!!11!"

  16. BravoSierra BravoSierra
    posted a quote
    October 28, 2013 1:09pm EDT
    i may be ugly and annoying,
    but at least the background on my phone isn't a selfie

  17. happiest* happiest*
    posted a quote
    October 19, 2013 1:05pm EDT
    u (◠‿◠✿)
    did not (◠‿◠✿)
    teach us this (◠‿◠✿)
    why is it (◠‿◠✿)
    on the test (◠‿◠✿)
    BTCH (⊙‿⊙✿)

  18. happiest* happiest*
    posted a quote
    October 25, 2013 1:35pm EDT
    do you ever pretend like you didn’t see something
    so the other person doesn’t feel embarrassed

  19. ^_^* ^_^*
    posted a quote
    November 15, 2013 2:37pm EST
    getting into a relationship may seem like a good idea but so was getting on the titanic and look what happened there

  20. spence* spence*
    posted a quote
    November 16, 2013 12:13pm EST
    wait a minute this isn’t my homework
    this is witty
    how did this happen

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