A lot of people want to hear my story..
Are you one of those people?
No?
Well, you're going to anyway.
My bullying story took off in, probably 1st grade. There was a girl that always made fun of me. She's was mean and hateful. She would pull my hair, and push me. She was "popular" I meant nothing to her. Or any of her friends. I didn't care. I stayed nice to her.
Let's skip to about fourth grade. I dyed my hair blonde. And everyone started to call me names, and would threaten to cut my hair, and I hated it. I wasn't skinny. I wasn't pretty. I didn't really care though. I was confident.. Till about fifth grade, I lost confidence. I hated what I looked like in the mirror. And it made it hard to even look at myself.
Sixth grade, bullying got bad.. I was pushed everyday. I was hit. I was stabbed with pencils.. I wanted to give up.. Finally, all my friends started hating me.. So, I started cutting.. It was a BIG mistake! The bullying got worse and worse.
That summer, I went to a camp. I made friends, and finally felt wanted. I didn't want to ever leave. But when I did, my mom got abusive. It was terrible. My brother hoped that it'd all stop for me, but it of course didn't. Oh yeah, lets backtrack. My birthday, the year I turned 12.. My mom was drunk/high. She decided to try and beat me.. She told me she hated me.. That I was a mistake. I believed her.. My brother ran away that day.. 2 days before my birthday.. The only words I heard him say for what felt like forever were "Happy Birthday Sydney." Then he left..
Seventh grade year. I was determined to make it AMAZING! But, it wasn't amazing. It started off good. Then, around October, I met a guy. I thought I loved him.. We started dating the same day we met. And I didn't regret it at first. I didn't know that It was going to almost kill me..
One week into dating, I gave myself away to him.. Dumbest decision ever... Everyone at school found out, I was called a "no good *****" daily.. I wanted to die. That's when my cutting got bad. One night, I got so sick of life, that I put a knife to my throat, ready to end it.. I made a small cut, then dropped it. I don't know why, but I did.
Im gonna skip around a bit. I developed anorexia because everyone thought I was pregnant, and I was determined to starve myself until every bone in my body showed. I got to that point, then got made to eat again. I was thankful..
Today, im a recovered anorexic, and im still fighting self harm, but, im winning. I've been clean a week. The point of this is to show you, that no matter where life takes you, God always has a bigger plan for you. Im living proof. Just about two weeks ago, I lost the guy I thought I was going to marry. I was miserable, but, I have to look on the bright side, he's my best friend now, and im thankful for that. After all my suicide attempts, through all my pain, and with my scars, God still hasn't given up on me yet. He hasn't given up on you either, so don't give up on yourself just yet. Your story hasn't ended yet. Don't make it.
Stay Strong!
ZebraLover87