Kyle,
You're killing me, it's hard to leave you alone. Just seeing your face makes me cry, but I can't seem to stop going up to you to talk. When I talk to you, I get a little bit of hope you will think this was a mistake. I hope you know I will ALWAYS love you. I can't not love you, even if you don't love me anymore. Where did this go? I need you to protect me again, I need you to wipe my tears away. I need you to tell me you'll always be there for me because I'm worth it. But I'm not. Even though the other day you told me I was so much more than just another person, you went and did this, I'm no more than another girl to you am I? After about a year and a half of dating, I'm just a nobody. I can't hate you for this, I understand... sort of. I wish you would look into my eyes, and see how much I did love you, how much I still DO love you. You're one of my best friends, you will always be one of my best friends. If you just want to avoid me, tell me and I'll leave you. I will still watch you pass me in the hall, I will still cry near you, and I will still try to talk to you every once in a while but I'll stop texting you, I'll stop calling you, and I'll stop going up to you every day. I can't forgive myself for anything I did, you won't tell me what it was though. I miss you, I miss your hugs, I miss your laugh, I miss your smile, I miss those laughing kisses, I miss those pecks in the hall, I miss holding your hand and just thinking "I'm so lucky." I'm not anymore, I let it go away. I can't handle this, I almost jumped in front of a car this morning. Remember all the other stress I told you about that's going on? It's now doubled. I'm being pushed over the edge and this time, this time you aren't there to catch me. You won't save me anymore, you're just leaving me to fend for myself in the hardest time in my life. Remember when you told guidance I cut? You can't help me through that either. You've saved my life, and changed my life so many times in so many ways whether you know it or not, I hope you can forgive me for anything that I've done, and any stress I gave you. I can't breath now without thinking about you. I can't stop listening to the messages from you on my phone, I can't stop looking at pictures, and I can't stop listening to our song, "you and me." Remember when we decided that was our song? I love that memory. That, our first kiss, and our slow dance. Those are my favorite memories. Now I'm crying again, I miss you so much. It's only been a few days and I already am giving up. I'm fixing myself though, I threw my blades away and I stopped hitting myself. If you say the word, I'll do almost anything for you. I'm sorry to all my friends who dissagree with me saying that but I love you and I'm not willing to give up. Sorry if you wanted me to just stop loving you once you told me you couldn't love me anymore. You're my first boyfriend, and I could see you being my last. Yeah, you're that amazing. It's a crazy thought for me to think isn't it? No, not to me. I will always love you.
-the girl you broke
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