First of all, I'm sorry this isn't pretty enough for you but please read...please.
So, last night I wasn't feeling very good about myself. I was in my room alone and just kind of in a haze, it was like I was in a dream or something. All of a sudden I found I picked up my shaver and started scraping it against my hand. I had 6 cuts and 3 were bleeding and wouldn't stop. My mum was in the shower so I grabbed a tissue and held it to my hand, I felt sick. I don't know why I did it and I wish I could take it back. I went to bed feeling like sh*t. The next day I walked to the bus stop where I meet my best friend every morning, I told her I needed to tell her something important. She looked worried but I had to say it, I told her I did something and showed her my hand. It killed me because she looked at it then up to my face and said was it the dog? the cat? I shook my head and said it was me, by this point I was crying, the tears wouldn't stop. She hugged me instantly and asked me why, I told her because I'm not happy with the way I look. She said you are sooo pretty and I wished I looked like you. I don't believe her but I was thankful for that. I had to hide the cuts for the rest of the day, it was hard. I caught people noticing them but I turned my hand over and hoped they thought I just scratched it...then when we were leaving for sport a girl in year 9 picked up my hand and said are those cuts? I said no and she said are you lying? I said no again and hoped she would believe me, my other friends were there though. I don't think they know they kind of said dog scratch? yeah. It was one of the worst days of my life. I hate myself for it and I wish I could take it back. I will never do it again.
Please if you are thinking about cutting, don't. It doesn't just effect you. I wish I never did it and I hope I can be happy again and there won't be any noticeable scars.
Thanks if you actually took the time to read it...I'm nearly crying but I guess I needed to let it out, and I forgot to mention, my mum doesn't know. If you have any advice...please help me. Oh and I'm 13. Thanks.
SecretsWereBroken