I Lost Everything
December 12, 2011
I miss her so much.♥
January 7th2011
The next day, I woke up not feeling well. I called for my mom and she told me that Lecia wasn't feeling good either. I had to go see her, but my whole body hurt so bad. But, I didn't care. I stood up, ever so carefully and walked into the guestroom where she stayed. When I opened the door she was looking up at the ceiling whispering something I couldn't hear. "Lece?" I asked when I walked into the room. She glanced toward me. "Conn-" She tried saying but her voice stopped. "Shhh," I whispered "Don't talk, Hun." She looked into my eyes, and started crying.
We stayed home from school that day. Although we weren't allowed to talk, we just texted each other. I couldn't stand not being able to hear her voice. It was the purest, and sweetest thing in my Life. She told me through text that she was sorry, and she thought she needed to be removed from the house and placed in a hospital. I kept telling her no, but she insisted.
I wouldn't stand seeing her in a hospital. I tried and tried to tell her no. Eventually she called my mom and told her with what little voice she could use. My mom agreed to take her. I insisted on coming with them. My mother, knowing I would die without Lecia, let me come. The whole ride there I sat looking at her. She looked back, with tears in her blue eyes. I grabbed her hand and held it close to my heart so she'd know I was there. In this with her.
When we arrived I was still clutching her hand in mine, whispering to her that everything would be okay. I actually wasn't sure, but I couldn't let her know that. "No." Was the last thing she said. The doctor examined her, and couldn't find anything wrong, but she insisted something was wrong with her, and demanded to stay. I told her not to, but the doctors could see the hopelessness in her eyes and let her.
I stayed there the rest of the day, coughing and hacking up. I didn't want to stay here. I'd be placed in a different room, away from Lecia. And that couldn't happen. If anything happened to her, and I wasn't there, it'd be all my fault. I couldn't live with that, so I stayed by her side.
I kept looking at my phone to check the time I'd been there, and she'd been asleep. 5 hours. She looked so peaceful, I couldn't disturb her, so I watched. I kinda felt like a stalker, but we were in Love, I'd do anything for her. If she said jump, I'd jump. That's how much I loved her, and always will.
At 3:48 A.M. The doctors made me leave the room for testing. They poked her, and prodded her. I couldn't bare to look, so I called my mom and had her come pick me up for the night. I hated leaving Lecia, but I had to sleep in my own bed so I could be ready for the next long day of waiting for her.
I couldn't sleep. I kept having this dream about me watching her. And as I watched her, her whole body started to shrivle. It was just sucking itself in like some old fruit that was rotten. She wasn't rotten, so why? It got so bad, she just started to disendegrate. That was the part I always woke up at. Her dying was like someone taking my heart, and blowing it up. My love for her couldn't wait to see her. I stayed up and re-read old texts to and from her.
Eventually, I fell asleep. In the morning I hurridly got dressed, ate and woke my mom up. She wasn't really willing to take me back to see Lecia, but I begged and she knew she had to or I'd find a way. So she took the safer way, and took me herself. "Connor?" She said, breaking the comforting silence. "Mom?" I replied. "You really love her, don't you?" She asked me, smiling. "I do, Mom. I know you, and others might not see it.. But I really love Lecia." I replied, looking around. "Honey, I get it. But what happens if..." She stopped. I knew exactly what she was going to say. "She'll make it, Mom." I said.
When we got into the hospital parking lot, I threw the door open and ran inside. The women at the desk smiled and said "Can I help you, sir?" I smiled back and said "Where is Lecia Joan Harrison?" I asked her, not really wanting to be told; "Sorry, sonny. But Lecia isn't in the correct condition to have visitors. Sorry." I saw her frowning as she whispered "Try again later." Tears filled my eyes. "N-No! Please, I-I-I've got to see her!" She stared at me and called for backup.
I ran down the hall, not really looking for her, I was looking for somewhere that no one would see me crying. "GET HIM!" People behind me yelled. I didn't care that everyone was looking at me, or that I was waking people with my loud panting and stomping feet. All I wanted was to see her, and to cry because I could not.
I Just Jad To See Her One Last Time.
Please tell me if you like it? Any suggestions? Thankyou♥