Loverbestrong

Loverbestrong
posted a quote
July 19, 2014 12:47am UTC

"Why do you push people away?" "You need to learn to stop pushing people away." " Why won't you let me in? I care about you"
These three questions, questions like them, phrases, demands like those aer the key to making me want to cut you out of my life.
See for me pushing people away and out of my life is sort of like a mental pattern that I've developed. I can't just stop. See when I was six years old I figured out that if I don't let people get close to me, when they leave, you don't get hurt and if you do look for someone to blame you get to blame yourself. I mentally can not believe that you "care" about me or want to protect me or want to get close to me. Because when I was six years old, the woman who gave birth to me, the one who is supposed to love and care for you no matter what, that woman, abandoned me and my siblings. She kept crying and saying she loved me and cared for me but yet she walked out. Walked out for two years, made a guest appearance for a few months, and fades in and out of my life for the past 10 years. This woman looked me straight in the eyes, could see the heart break and pain she was causing, and yet she chose to leave anyway. Also at this time my dad who "cared for me" "wanted to protect me" did some pretty shady stuff that he should have ended up in jail for.
Ever since then friends, and family members both have walked into my life and gone out just as quick. I was confused and hurt. And then I realised it was because I let them get close to me, I shared personal things with them. Yet after all of that I still had the heart to believe that maybe one person someday would be different.
But when you finally get to understand and realize whats actually going on, you realize that everyone does in fact leave.
So im sorry I'm bracing myself for the impact of the pain thats going to be caused when you leave. I

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Loverbestrong
posted a quote
July 4, 2014 12:52am UTC

Fat, ugly, stupid, weird.
She heard those words,
Names everyday.
She didn't ask to be
This way.
She just wants to fit in.
Her meals got smaller,
Make-up appears in her life.
She studies 4 hours a night.
She quits being her self.
Nerd, anorexic, quite, shy.
More words, names come,
She can't fit in.
She adds more food,
Quits studying,
Starts talking.
Fat, ugly, stupid, weird.
Nothing seems to work.
She isn't her self anymore.
Now, she sits in a box
6 feet down.
She just tried to fit in.
Pretty, perfect, happy, missed.
She's perfect now.
Now that she's gone.
Now they see the real her.
They see past everything.
Words, names have done
This to her.
Words, names took
Her life away.
N.S

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Loverbestrong
posted a quote
July 3, 2014 2:07am UTC

You only want me when I'm leaving.

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Loverbestrong
posted a quote
June 16, 2014 3:11pm UTC

I could try to pretend that I don't think about you

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Loverbestrong
posted a quote
June 9, 2014 5:40pm UTC

Is there really a second chance? I mean, is it possible to start over? It obviously doesn’t just happen overnight. You don’t forget, and there will always be something that reminds you of what happened before? I mean yes you can change your hair, your entire wardrobe, where you go to school, the people you talk to, what you do, and how you act, but is it really a new start? Is it a new chance at life?

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Loverbestrong
posted a quote
June 9, 2014 10:23am UTC

I'D REALLY LIKE TO THANK MOTHER NATURE AND GETTING MY WISDOM TEETH OUT FOR BEING A GREAT START TO MY SUMMER.

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Loverbestrong
posted a quote
June 9, 2014 10:22am UTC

I'D REALLY LIKE TO THANK MOTHER NATURE AND GETTING MY WISDOM TEETH OUT FOR BEING A GREAT START TO MY SUMMER.

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Loverbestrong
posted a quote
June 8, 2014 9:18pm UTC

Just because someone dresses in short shorts, or tank tops, or crop tops, or anything else, it doesn't mean that they don't respect themselves.
It means Oh hey this is comfortable for me, I am comfortable with my body so yeah I'm going to wear it.
This whole idea of "oh you're wearing short shorts? honey learn some self respect" is complete bull freaking crap.
Do you even know what self respect means? It means pride and confidence in oneself. And the last time I checked, that definition did no where include
"Not wearing short shorts, tanktops, or bikinis"
If you don't like it, then don't wear it and don't look at me.

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Loverbestrong
posted a quote
June 8, 2014 9:07pm UTC

Dear boy #1.
We made out three times. January first, March fifth, and April twelfth. First of all, I have had a crush on you since middle school. Even in middle school there was a rumor you were going to ask me out but then you got nervous and never did. Then we started working together, and every time you would talk to me I would get massive butterflies. Then we started hanging out and I guess I just kept falling harder and harder for you. So on January first, we were at a New Years Party and I was not having a good time because my cousin passed away the week before so I was about to leave. I went out to my friends car and you followed me out there. I did not ask you to do that. You did that yourself. You didn't want me to leave. You held me and wanted me to talk to you and that was the first time I admitted I liked you. You said you liked me too and then you kissed me. We went back inside and that was it. Never did anything about it after that.
March fifth we were coming home from our friends and we just dropped off the other girl and you were taking me home, but you were also taking the long way. Then we started talking about us. About why we fell apart since middle school. Then you drove up to the side of my house. I was about to get out of the car but you asked me to stay. We started talking about our feelings for eachother and you made my heart melt. You held my hand and told me you wanted to be in a relationship with me but there were so many other factors you had to take into account. You told me I gave you butterflies and you liked me. Then I was babbling on about something and you took my face in your hand and told me to just kiss you so we did. Nothing ever happened after that either.
April twelfth. We were all at your house and you and everyone else like usual were picking on me. So I decided to go downstairs and take a breather. But you just couldn't leave me alone now could you? You had to follow me, and tell me fine reject you five times. I was confused and then you just kissed me. In the midst of all that everyone came down and saw and my best friend, got extremely upset. After that she and I didn't talk, I stopped hanging out with you guys. And you and I just stopped talking.
Yet here we are. You keep "flirting" with me. You keep texting me all these things. You keep pulling me back in, and then for one night I'll believe you like me and that I should try super hard to keep you in my life. But then you suddenly stop. I come out of my haze and I realise that what I've been doing is for the best. Because lets be honest for a minute. You never were planning to make me yours. You were saying all of those things to just get what you wanted. You were using me. And I didn't care. I didn't care because you were someone I liked and wanted. I thought maybe if you used me enough, you would eventually fall for me. But that hasn't happened. So tell me why I should even bother, keeping your name in my phone. Why should I bother even trying with you anymore. If you say Hi, I will respond with Hi. If you ask me how I'm doing I'll say fine. But I will NOT keep being fooled by you, or playing your little games. It's not fair that everyone else can move on from you, but when I say hey yeah I'm over you, you immedietley burst into tears and saying you're sorry and you don't want me to be over you, that I'm not allowed to not have feelings for you anymore.
I'm doing this for me. I'm doing this so I can have a reset in my life. I want a new start. You are toxic and I'm finally kicking you out of my life.

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Loverbestrong
posted a quote
June 8, 2014 5:58pm UTC

Why is it that we always have to look to others for how we should feel about ourselves?
Why can't we determine that we are great. We are fabulous. We are pretty. We are more than enough.

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Loverbestrong
posted a quote
June 8, 2014 5:56pm UTC

I don't get it. I really just don't get it. Why do we ALWAYS go back to the people who hurt us regardless if there is someone else who would give you the world and treat you how you deserve?

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Loverbestrong
posted a quote
June 8, 2014 1:08am UTC

It's like you have some freaking sixth sense.
I swear every time I'm almost over you and I'm trying to move on, bam, I get a text from you.
You remind me of all the reasons I fell for you. But then after a while it stops.
So I go back to getting over you and trying to move on.
But we keep runnng this same circle over and over again.

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Loverbestrong
posted a quote
June 5, 2014 5:21pm UTC

I'm sorry I called. I'm sorry my heart won't stop speaking up.

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Loverbestrong
posted a quote
June 5, 2014 1:02am UTC

Boy: " I want a girlfriend. I just wanna make out with someone. I'm just so desperate. I'll be alone forever."
Me; Throws myself at boy.
Boy: "eww no what are you? Is that your face? No no I don't want you."
oh.

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Loverbestrong
posted a quote
June 4, 2014 10:12am UTC

I'm over here in the corner dreamin about us together.

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Loverbestrong
posted a quote
June 3, 2014 6:32pm UTC

I'm ready for a new start.
A new house.
A new life.
A new school.
New friends.
New boyfriend.
My drivers liscence.
A new job.
A new wardrobe.
A new style.
Everything and anything to get you off my mind, and to focus on me and being happy.

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Loverbestrong
posted a quote
June 3, 2014 6:30pm UTC

They day that YOU walked out of MY life,
everything I do
What I say
Who I hang out with,
What I wear,
How I do in school,
My love life,
absolutely everything
& anything about me
& my life
Stopped being any of your business.

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Loverbestrong
posted a quote
June 3, 2014 6:11pm UTC

Last night I was at work with my ex bestfiend.
She was in the back with some of our friends.
I went back their to check my schedule.
I heard all of them talking crap on me and today they were all making fun of me.
It literally made me sick to my stomach and I came home and threw up and have been crying for two days now.
You really can't trust anyone.

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Loverbestrong
posted a quote
June 2, 2014 6:40pm UTC

Tell me what do you see in her, because I've been living in sweet despair.
& All I really know is my tears won't dry tonight.

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Loverbestrong
posted a quote
June 2, 2014 9:38am UTC

Go on put the knife in, run away, I don't need you anyway.

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Loverbestrong