Witty Profiles

LolaLori

1. LolaLori
   posted a quote
   June 29, 2014 3:48pm UTC
   My little brother just gave me a lecture about how you actually can't ketch'em all
   
   👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 2 points
2. LolaLori
   posted a quote
   February 15, 2014 6:36pm UTC
   You know you're in a class full of teengers
   when every sentence begins with,
   "Yeah, like.."
   
   👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 3 points
3. LolaLori
   posted a quote
   January 1, 2014 5:00pm UTC
   ---------------------
   Guess Who's
   back
   I'm hoping we can bring this back after 3 years!
   ♥
   ---------------------
   
   👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 2 points
4. LolaLori
   posted a quote
   December 26, 2013 3:23pm UTC
   True Story
   Me: *Wears socks that are too high to be normal and too low to be fashionable*
   Uncle: Oh, is that the new trend now?
   Me: no.
   
   👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 4 points
5. LolaLori
   posted a quote
   December 10, 2013 12:11am UTC
   -lives in the same house for 5-years
   -still doesn't know which cabinets the dishes are in
   -pathetic?
   - Naw
   
   👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 6 points
6. LolaLori
   posted a quote
   December 10, 2013 12:04am UTC
   what the heck is stumbleupon anyway
   
   👍 this is good · read the comments · 5 points
7. LolaLori
   posted a quote
   December 8, 2013 11:00pm UTC
   *Posts a quote*
   *gets a like imediately after posting*
   *expects 1000 likes by tomorrow*
   *realizes witty isn't like that anymore*
   *never gets a like ever again in entire life*
   
   👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 13 points
8. LolaLori
   posted a quote
   October 21, 2013 10:13pm UTC
   I'm that g irl
   that ruins the joke by over analyizing it
   mine
   
   👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 11 points
9. LolaLori
   posted a quote
   September 27, 2013 6:19pm UTC
   Saying, "I want that!"
   to every single barbie comerical that comes on.
   
   👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 7 points
10. LolaLori
    posted a quote
    July 26, 2013 8:10pm UTC
    *teacher at mcdonalds drive-through*
    Speaker: Hello! Can I take your order?
    Teacher: I don't know, can you?
    
    👍 this is good · read the comments · 14 points
11. LolaLori
    posted a quote
    June 27, 2013 3:38pm UTC
    *last day of school*
    Everyone else: *bawling their eyes out*
    Me: adios, bitchachos.
    
    👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 6 points
12. LolaLori
    posted a quote
    June 27, 2013 3:25pm UTC
    It was beauty who killed the beast
    -Carl, King Kong
    
    👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 10 points
13. LolaLori
    posted a quote
    June 23, 2013 5:21pm UTC
    Person: I can do a backflip
    Person: I can do the splits
    Person: I can do a handstand
    Person: I can sing like an angel
    Person: I am a phenomal dancer
    Person: I'm goregeous
    Me: I can breath
    Me: *chokes*
    
    👍 this is good · read the comments · 18 points
14. LolaLori
    posted a quote
    June 9, 2013 1:13pm UTC
    *log on to facebook*
    Chick: I wonder if my mom is a virgin...?
    *log off of facebook*
    
    👍 this is good · read the comments · 13 points
15. LolaLori
    posted a quote
    June 8, 2013 6:27pm UTC
    I'd just like to say that going up to someone really tall and
    telling them, is just as annoying and pointless as going up to someone short and telling them...
    
    👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 4 points
16. LolaLori
    posted a quote
    June 6, 2013 8:55pm UTC
    That awkward moment
    when you get in the van... and there is no candy.
    
    👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 9 points
17. LolaLori
    posted a quote
    June 3, 2013 11:46am UTC
    Person: An apple a day keeps the doctor away!
    Me: Are you suggesting I throw apples at my doctor?
    
    👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 9 points
18. LolaLori
    posted a quote
    May 17, 2013 8:11pm UTC
    Try to imagine a world without timekeeping.
    You probably can't. You know the month, the year, the day of the week. There is a clock on your wall or the dashboard of your car. You have a schedule, a calender, a time for dinner or movie. Yet all around you, timekeeping is ignored. Birds are not late. A dog does not check it's watch. Deer do not fret over passing birthdays. Man alone measures time. Man alone chimes the hour. And because of that, man alone suffers a paralyzing fear that no other creature endures.
    A fear of time running out.
    
    👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 26 points
19. LolaLori
    posted a quote
    May 17, 2013 7:05pm UTC
    Sometimes I cry while chopping carrots so that onions don't think they're ugly or something.
    
    👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 8 points
20. LolaLori
    posted a quote
    May 6, 2013 8:17pm UTC
    *Me hangin' with some friends*
    Me: How was your day, rock?
    Rock:
    Me: She. did. WHAT?!?
    Rock:
    Me: And yours, peice of lint?
    Lint:
    Me: Why that sounds lovely!
    Lint:
    Me: What was that wilting petal? How was my day? Well, wait for it. I went outside for a WHOLE. 30. SECONDS.
    Lint, Rock, Petal:
    Me: HABHAHARHGAHAHAHSA, oh rock, you're hilarious!
    
    👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 7 points

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