Witty Profiles

LifeStory

1. LifeStory
   posted a quote
   March 11, 2014 4:13pm UTC
   Imagine if
   Taylor Swift and Taylor Lautner got married. They'd both be
   Taylor Lautner.
   
   👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 14 points
2. LifeStory
   posted a quote
   January 16, 2014 1:34pm UTC
   Whenever I'm just walking around town,
   I always get those, "What a weirdo," looks and
   I'm like "What the hell have I done now?"
   Urrrghhh, strangers.
   
   👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 3 points
3. LifeStory
   posted a quote
   August 6, 2013 10:19am UTC
   Am I the only one who's scared to ask
   a question to the teacher incase everyone immediatly thinks I'm dumb?
   Just me?
   
   👍 this is good · read the comments · 11 points
4. LifeStory
   posted a quote
   August 6, 2013 10:02am UTC
   We were shopping at the shopping mall
   and my brother was singing "Single Ladies" while shaking his butt infront of about 500 people.
   Omg, you don't understand my embarrasment.
   
   👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 7 points
5. LifeStory
   posted a quote
   July 25, 2013 1:25pm UTC
   Things end.
   BUT MEMORIES
   last forever.
   Please don't remove this!
   
   👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 5 points
6. LifeStory
   posted a quote
   July 25, 2013 1:18pm UTC
   Girl: What's the first thing you notice when you see a girl?
   Boy: That she isn't you.
   
   👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 8 points
7. LifeStory
   posted a quote
   July 13, 2013 3:33pm UTC
   Mean Girls 2
   is like the Disney Channel version of Mean Girls.
   
   👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 2 points
8. LifeStory
   posted a quote
   July 10, 2013 7:38am UTC
   I'm not a princess, this ain't a fairy tale,
   I'm not the one you'll sweep off her feet,
   Lead her up the stairwell
   This ain't Hollywood, this is a small town,
   I was a dreamer before you went and let me down,
   Now it's too late for you and your white horse to come around.
   [♥] [♥] [♥]
   
   👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 9 points
9. LifeStory
   posted a quote
   July 9, 2013 8:08pm UTC
   I hate it when people use YOLO incorrectly.
   Their just like: "I brushed my teeth with my feet, YOLO"
   I mean that's not even YOLO. That's more like NOYOUDONT-O
   
   👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 7 points
10. LifeStory
    posted a quote
    July 9, 2013 8:04pm UTC
    The popular girls in my year were flirting with my maths teacher.
    He's like 60 years old and has 4 kids.
    
    👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 6 points
11. LifeStory
    posted a quote
    July 9, 2013 4:30pm UTC
    My teacher was giving out maths homework
    and then when he was finished he was just like
    "Yeah Yolo kids, yolo. Thats what you kids say today, innit?"
    All I can just say is facepalm. It was that humiliating.
    True Story
    
    👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 10 points
12. LifeStory
    posted a quote
    July 9, 2013 4:17pm UTC
    I was looking at my mum's texts to her friend and they were just like:
    Mum's friend: Hey babe lyk hw r u doin. u hvin gd time?
    Mum: lyk babes im lyk hvin hell day. u totes nt seein wats goin on here.
    Mum's friend: lyk omg u did nt see Derekey babey he is lyk totes omg
    Mum: lyk omg i saw him he's lyk omg
    You just don't understand the embarrassment i'm feeling.
    
    👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 19 points
13. LifeStory
    posted a quote
    July 9, 2013 4:08pm UTC
    Everybody thinks I'm like a sweet lil' bunny from heaven
    when really I'm like a raging volcano from hell.
    
    👍 this is good · read the comments · 85 points
14. LifeStory
    posted a quote
    July 9, 2013 4:04pm UTC
    Whenever someone posts a youtube url
    and says "Watch this sh.t" I get really worried incase it's porrnn or something.
    
    👍 this is good · read the comments · 76 points
15. LifeStory
    posted a quote
    July 9, 2013 10:24am UTC
    me: I'm getting to addicted to witty, i can't go on it anymore
    * 10 minutes later*
    me: you know i'll just check if somebody has favourited my quote.
    *ends up staying up all night*
    
    👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 26 points
16. LifeStory
    posted a quote
    July 9, 2013 9:47am UTC
    If eating food was an exam
    i'd be getting A*'s.
    
    👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 11 points
17. LifeStory
    posted a quote
    July 9, 2013 9:45am UTC
    How did people come up with names for stuff?
    I mean would they just be like:
    "I hereby declare this huge thing on my back bottom and for short it will be called butt"
    
    👍 this is good · read the comments · 114 points
18. LifeStory
    posted a quote
    July 1, 2013 2:01pm UTC
    You've got what I need,
    But you say your just a friend
    
    👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 5 points
19. LifeStory
    posted a quote
    July 1, 2013 1:58pm UTC
    I wanna be your everything,
    I want to be the one that you need
    So tell me where you've been all my life,
    I'm gonna make you mine tonight
    
    👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 3 points
20. LifeStory
    posted a quote
    July 1, 2013 1:46pm UTC
    Jessica Simpson just named her child Ace Knute.
    Wtf is wrong with these people?
    
    👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 3 points

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