ImmaDirectioner's Favorites

ImmaDirectioner

briiitttttttany
posted a quote
July 20, 2011 7:06pm UTC

Nice tan,
What's your race? Carrot?

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TEXTFAILS
posted a quote
July 23, 2011 10:39pm UTC

Whenever you go to the doctors
and the doctor asks you what's wrong
you turn to your mom
and she explains everything (:
♥ Fave if you do too ♥

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itslashellebitchezz
posted a quote
December 19, 2010 9:14pm UTC

Who else remembers;
"Does your mom wanna talk to my mom?"

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ThatsSoMeee
posted a quote
August 14, 2011 4:24pm UTC

What if your pillow
Could collect your dreams and when you wake up,
You could plug it into your computer
And watch them over again.

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lovecrazy
posted a quote
November 14, 2012 4:47pm UTC

click to see this quote

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Ineedmakyinme
posted a quote
October 9, 2012 3:37pm UTC

There's a man in his 80's, who lives in my city near a beautiful cliff.
It's a place people frequently go to suicide. Every time he sees someone too close to the edge, he rushes over and tries to stop them.
It's estimated he's saved over 160 people.
Don Ritchie, I don't know you, but you give me hope .
Don Ritchie passed away yesterday at the age of 85.
He was named a 'Local Hero' in the 2011 Austrailian of the Year Awards.
His funeral will be held on Friday.
By now, he's saved over 500 lives and I know alot of you have heard of him but for those of you who haven't, I think you should, because this guy's a real hero.♥
nmf/nmq(from givesmehope.com

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JustMeh
posted a quote
November 3, 2012 1:39pm UTC

Not one person wished me a happy birthday today.
Which I suppose is fair, since it isn't my birthday

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shootingstar87
posted a quote
October 21, 2012 3:32pm UTC

me: can you please stop smoking?
mom: well only if you get a quote with 500 favs. that seems like a reasonable cause to stop.

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ImSailingAway
posted a quote
November 9, 2012 2:34pm UTC

Once upon a time there was a girl who had four boyfriends.
She loved the fourth boyfriend the most and adorned him with rich robes and treated him to the finest of delicacies. She gave him nothing but the best.
She also loved the third boyfriend very much and was always showing him off to neighboring kingdoms. However, she feared that one day he would leave her for another.
She also loved her second boyfriend. He was her confidant and was always kind, considerate and patient with her. Whenever this girl faced a problem, she could confide in him, and he would help her get through the difficult times.
The girl's first boyfriend was a very loyal partner and had made great contributions in maintaining her wealth and kingdom. However, she did not love the first boyfriend, although he loved her deeply, she hardly took notice of him!
One day, the girl fell ill and she knew her time was short. She thought of her luxurious life and wondered, 'I now have four boyfriends with me, but when I die, will I be alone.'
Thus, she asked the fourth boyfriend, 'I loved you the most, endowed you with the finest clothing and showered great care over you.. Now that I'm dying, will you follow me and keep me company?
'No way!', replied the fourth boyfriend, and he walked away without another word.
His answer cut like a sharp knife right into her heart.
The sad girl then asked the third boyfriend, 'I loved you all my life. Now that I'm dying, will you follow me and keep me company?' 'No!', replied the third boyfriend.. 'Life is too good! When you die, I'm going to marry someone else!' Her heart sank and turned cold.
She then asked the second boyfriend, 'I have always turned to you for help and you've always been there for me. When I die, will you follow me and keep me company?'
'I'm sorry, I can't help you out this time!', replied the second boyfriend. 'At the very most, I can only walk with you to your grave.'
His answer struck her Like a bolt of lightning, and the girl was devastated.
Then a voice called out: 'I'll go with you. I'll follow you no matter where you go.' The girl looked up, and there was her first boyfriend. He was very skinny as he suffered from malnutrition and neglect.
Greatly grieved, the girl said, 'I should have taken much better care of you when I had the chance!'
In truth, you have four boyfriends in your lives:
Your fourth boyfriend is your body. No matter how much time and effort you lavish in making it look good, it will leave you when you die.
Your third boyfriend is your possessions, status and wealth.When you die, it will all go to others.
Your second boyfriend is your family and friends. No matter how much they have been there for you, the furthest they can stay by you is up to the grave.
And your first boyfriend is your spirit.. Often neglected in pursuit of wealth, power and pleasures of the world.

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BlackButterflies
posted a quote
September 22, 2012 4:55pm UTC

on the x-factor:
simon: whats your name?
lady: panda
simon: what?!
lady: panda, like the bear.
simon: why were you called panda?
lady: well, my mom was in jail when she had me, and her cell mate was white, and she was black, so they just came up with the name.

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jimmy365
posted a quote
September 17, 2012 5:39pm UTC

so i was talking to
this girl in my art class.
and i was like,
"I want to go to college in England"
and then she said,
"but, wouldn't you have to learn another language?"
another
language
another
language.

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Arilena :)*
posted a quote
October 27, 2012 12:48pm UTC

My best guy friend & I kissed last night.
It kind of just happened.
I was sitting with him on a park bench , waiting for his ride. suddenly , he stared into my eyes, pulled me close to him, and told me he's madly in love with me. that he's always loved me. that he doesntcare if i dont love him back , cause he'll wait for me forever. then , he got off the bench , lifted me up, & kissed me. I actually learned what it felt like to have 'sparks fly'. Then , he sat me back down , & he started playing with my hair & fingers. Since that was one of the first times he looked right into my eyes, i asked him why he always looks down when he talks to me. he said my eyes make him weak. He addmitted everything. he said chills run up and down his spine when i touch him , he has constantbutterflies when hes with me , he has dreams about me every night , & no matter what he does im on his mind 24/7. He went on for about 20 mintues until his ride showed up . when he was leaving , he kissed my forehead & said ' i love you.'
my stomach fluttered & i realized i loved him too. I told him , & he smiled for ear to ear. his eyes teared up , & he gave me the best hug anyones ever given me. He called me when he got home , & we talked until 5 A.M. (when i fell asleep on him) even though he had football practice at 9 A.M.
so , witty girls , just remember...
Love comes when you least expect it

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xstories_
posted a quote
October 1, 2012 6:59pm UTC

Today was my school talent show.
Me, being myself - decided to sing "Skyscraper" by Demi Lovato. I did my thing, I sang. And, at the end - people were in tears and I got a standing ovation. I have never felt so good about myself. The dean went to take the microphone away, but I asked if I could say something to my peers. He allowed me. That's when my heart poured out.. "Thank you all, really. Now, I have something to say." After that, it became dead silent. "You're clapping for me now, right? Weren't half of you guys the people who said I was 'fat' yesterday? Yeah. Little do you know, I can't keep my food down because of those things you say. I can go days without eating. I hope you know that." Then, I had to stop because some girls were laughing. I walked up to them and pulled up my bracelets. "Hey, Bri. Look. Look at what YOU caused. Yes, YOU. You practically put these scars on my wrist. Because of people like you, people turn into people like me. Can I just ask why? Why do you do this to me and so many others?" Her answer was this; "Well, Nicole. I do it because people are losers, a lot like you." And at that, I had enough. What did I say? I said, "Bri, I'm done. I'm done with you. So is everyone else. YOU NEED TO STOP. I'm sick of you. If you don't stop soon, something WILL happen. It may happen to me. Or to you. Or to that girl over there. Just, STOP. Ok? Go on and try to tear me down, I will be rising from the ground. Like a skyscraper." I turned around and walked away. I wasn't finished though. I turned back around to face my peers and said, "I thought suicide was the answer. But, I KNOW it's not. Don't try it, guys. You hurt yourself, you hurt your family. And it hurts your friends. Please. Talk to me if you need anything." People clapped so loud, my ears were about to bust. But, WAIT. I'm not done yet... This really popular guy, Mike, came up to the front. He took the microphone and said, "Nicole.. Thank you for giving me the courage to do this." No one knew what was coming, but what he said shocked so many people. "Bri, we're through." I have never laughed harder in my life. Best day ever? I think YES.
W

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FallenAngel*
posted a quote
September 15, 2013 1:26pm UTC

Today I stood under the shower for half an hour, having a conversation with my self in an American accent.
What is wrong with me?

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mollifers123
posted a quote
September 15, 2013 7:40pm UTC

Preppy girls that sit at my lunch table : Ugh ! I shouldn't even be eating this . *pushes their plate away and looks at people for compliments*
Me: Quit being an attention whöre and give me your damñ food. Gaaaaaah. *Takes food from their plate*

👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 42 points

posted a quote
January 1, 1970 12:00am UTC

This quote does not exist.

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SecretlyBrokenAndSilentlyHoping
posted a quote
September 15, 2013 11:33am UTC

How stubborn are the scars
when they won't fade away?
Or just a gentle reminder that
now are better days?

👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 34 points

Chris*
posted a quote
September 15, 2013 10:06am UTC

Me: I hate everyone
Classmate: What about your family?
Me: I hate everyone.

👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 31 points

aellyniq
posted a quote
September 15, 2013 5:56pm UTC

. . •
★★★
i watched his wildest dreams come true
and not one of them involving me at all.

👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 79 points

DeathOfASon

posted a quote
September 15, 2013 10:51am UTC

until 1979 homosexuality was classed as an illness in sweden
so you could call in sick because you had the hots for the paper boy in the morning.
The reason they took it out in 1979 was because, to protest it, a shitton of people actually did. They’d get calls upon calls upon calls with “I can’t come in today, I’m feeling pretty gay”

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