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FrankConnor

Status: alive... sort of

Member Since: 7 Aug 2012 01:37pm

Last Seen: 8 Jul 2015 05:03am

Gender: M

user id: 323352

130 Quotes
1,059 Favorites
79 Following
126 Followers
7 Comment Points
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FOR ONE SCAR LESS
I only follow for a good quote, so follow for a follow doesn't work with me.
If you have some good quotes though, I will read every quote you write.

Who am I?

I am not Frank Connor.
He doesn't even exist as far as I know.
*** update***
I googled Frank Connor, he does exist and is a big cheif in a company called Textron. XD

*** end update ***

I AM Frank Connor
He is Part of who I am.

The part of me...
... that likes to burn himself
... that saw death
... that hurts all people around me
... that's suicidal
... that is unhappy
... that likes being unhappy

But it is not all that I am.
I have another part.

The part of me...
... that loves all music
... that plays the guitar
... that grows roses
... that fell in love
***Update***
...And got heartbroken
*** End update***
... that loves life
... that wants to get better

I am 17 years old, 
and I've had quite a life so far.
I am in therapy,
since I have a manic depression and a light form of shizofrenia.
I do not have a split personality.
I'm also kleptomanic.

I'm willing to tell you all this, because none of you know me anyway.
and even if you do, you don't know it's me.

I live to help others, so if you have a problem, I'm here.
I often know exactly what you've been through.

if you read all this, there are only 2 possibilities.

Or you really care.
Or you recognise yourself.

Anyway, I appreciate it.
Thank you.

if you want to know your by my side, and I'm not alone,
don't give me those cheesy I feel so bad for you quotes.

It's enough for me if you say:
I know who you are.

just comment that, and I'll know I'm not alone.

Thanks for reading this, again
  1. FrankConnor FrankConnor
    posted a quote
    May 1, 2014 12:21pm UTC
    Tick Tock,
    Tick Tock.
    I'm waiting.
    The birds give concerts in the park,
    and the wind,
    rushing through the trees,
    applauds them.
    I'm waiting, again.
    A large hall, bustling with people,
    haphazard lines, snaking all around me.
    I have no clue where to go,
    but I know I'll have to wait in one of those queue's,
    So I do.
    A car stinking of leaking oil,
    whining from old age and no maintenance,
    stands in front of me.
    It's nearly 40 degrees celsius,
    and there's nothing on the radio.
    I'm waiting,
    for a change.
    A wooden desk, cold to the touch.
    Perspiration,
    from a mix of anticipation and fear,
    can be smelled in the room.
    There he comes, throws the papers on my desk.
    First page:
    name
    date
    class.
    OK, I got this.
    "You can't be done yet. You can give in your exam in an hour."
    So I do what I usually do.
    I'm waiting.
    The birds stopped singing,
    the sun went down.
    A lady is coming to tell me Mom's not coming.
    But I don't know that yet,
    I'm just waiting.

  2. FrankConnor FrankConnor
    posted a quote
    April 29, 2014 3:20am UTC
    WAITING
    I'm waiting.
    it's 2 o'clock in the afternoon.
    Class just ended.
    She'll be here soon, I said.
    And I wasn't worried.
    Why should I worry?
    We're all late every now and then.
    We all wait sometimes,
    for someone,
    or something.
    It's 3 o'clock in the afternoon.
    A lady comes over, asks me who's picking me up.
    She'll be here soon, I said.
    And I wasn't worried.
    We wait for our food, heating in the microwave.
    We wait in the car, 'till the lights go green.
    We wait for one another, whenever someone forgot something.
    We wait,
    for true love.
    It's 4 o'clock in the afternoon,
    All the other kids were gone by now.
    She'll be here soon, I said.
    And I wasn't worried.
    We all wait for love.
    But how do we know the difference?
    How do we know this is true?
    By trying,
    and breaking our heart in the process.
    It's 5 o'clock in the afternoon.
    A wind struck up, and it's getting cold.
    She'll be here soon I said,
    And I wasn't worried.
    Why is it, there's always someone hurt,
    when a relationship is over?
    Can't we just say:
    "Alright, this isn't it.
    Let's start over."
    And go back to waiting,
    waiting for true love.
    It's 6 o'clock in the afternoon.
    Nothing to hear but the birds in the park.
    She'll be here soon, I said.
    And I wasn't worried.
    What if it doesn't come?
    How can we know it will?
    Does it even exist?
    I believe it does,
    I want to believe it does.
    I hope it does.
    It's 7 o'clock in the afternoon.
    The grass grows damp with evening dew.
    She'll be here soon, I said.
    And I wasn't worried.
    Maybe true love doesn't exist.
    Maybe there is no one who will always match you perfectly.
    Who will always be there,
    who will support you no matter what.
    But maybe there is someone who you can forgive,
    no matter what,
    Maybe there's something between you worth fighting for,
    even though it's far from perfect.
    Maybe, just maybe,
    that's true love.
    It's 8 o'clock in the evening.
    A lady walks over to me.
    She wasn't coming, she said.
    And I was worried.

  3. FrankConnor FrankConnor
    posted a quote
    April 22, 2014 6:33am UTC
    Some people are like Supernova's.
    They burn brighter then the rest of us,
    Do things we couldn't even imagine,
    live on a different plain in the universe.
    And their gravity field is so strong,
    you get pulled in,
    whether you want it or not.
    But get too close, and you'll feel the heat,
    and get burned.
    But what's it like to be the supernova?
    How can you keep yourself contained.
    Supernova's are often in pain.
    They feel the fire as well, they get the burns.
    Maybe they send out so much light,
    to hide how dark their mind is within.
    Dim your lights,
    my Supernova,
    it's ok to be average.
    It's ok to calm down.
    It's ok to not know.
    You don't have to hide anymore, behind the fire you hold,
    because it's hurting you,
    and through you, it's hurting me.

  4. FrankConnor FrankConnor
    posted a quote
    April 17, 2014 8:55am UTC
    I am broken.
    Have been, for so long.
    Too long.
    But every time, I get out my roll of tape,
    a set of lies,
    false hopes
    blindfolds,
    so I won't see what's wrong.
    I wrap myself with it, this tape, and I go on.
    Tell everyone
    "I'm Fine."
    "I'm OK."
    "I can handle it now."
    But the tape never holds.
    And now it has peeled off again.
    And I'm broken.

  5. FrankConnor FrankConnor
    posted a quote
    April 1, 2014 6:13am UTC
    My father and I,
    We didn't get along.
    When mother left, we made a silent pact.
    I sttay out of your business,
    youstay out of mine.
    We may share a house,
    and I may be your child,
    but you have no clue how to handle me,
    and I have no clue how to talk to you.
    Until now.
    We talk.
    We care.
    And we finally realise,
    that we both have felt so bad, not having any connection to each other,
    because really,
    we do love eachother

  6. FrankConnor FrankConnor
    posted a quote
    April 1, 2014 6:10am UTC
    You can only be truly hurt by someone,
    if you loved them first.
    That counts for relationships, bullying, everything.
    I've been bullied quite a bit, but it never hurt me,
    until my best friend joined in.
    My heart has been broken many times,
    and I'll never stop any of those who broke it.
    My father has been angry, yelling, screaming, beating, so oten.
    Yet I know he loves me, and I love him.
    You can only be hurt, if you love first.
    And though I know what may follow, I'll never hesitate to take the jump.
    For love, is all I have left to live and die for.

  7. FrankConnor FrankConnor
    posted a quote
    April 1, 2014 5:51am UTC
    Apparently,
    I can't be alone.
    But I can't handle people either.
    So I guess I just can't handle life.

  8. FrankConnor FrankConnor
    posted a quote
    April 1, 2014 5:47am UTC
    I know what it feels like to be used.
    I've been there before.
    But just like the last time, even though I know,
    I can't help but give you another chance, and another.
    Because I love you,
    and I know you loved me.
    And somewhere,
    I'm hoping you still do.

  9. FrankConnor FrankConnor
    posted a quote
    April 1, 2014 5:44am UTC
    Why is it, that even though the love was true, and undying,
    it's still not meant to be?
    why is it, even though both still hurt, and both still long,
    It will never be?
    Why has it been broken?
    broken beyond repair,
    even though the love is still there.

  10. FrankConnor FrankConnor
    posted a quote
    March 28, 2014 8:39am UTC
    Why do I read this,
    If I've already read it,
    and I broke my mind before?
    I think I enjoy beinng broken

  11. FrankConnor FrankConnor
    posted a quote
    March 28, 2014 8:12am UTC
    click to see this quote

  12. FrankConnor FrankConnor
    posted a quote
    March 28, 2014 8:11am UTC
    Why do I love books so much?
    They're my way out.
    Out of life.
    A few moments of not caring,
    of not living, of being somewhere else.
    But this one is different.
    Because it's not a way out.
    It's a way in.

  13. FrankConnor FrankConnor
    posted a quote
    March 28, 2014 8:00am UTC
    Why do I love books so much?
    They're my way out.
    Out of life.
    A few moments of not caring,
    of not living, of being somewhere else.
    But this one is different.
    Because it's not a way out.
    It's a way in.

  14. FrankConnor FrankConnor
    posted a quote
    March 28, 2014 7:57am UTC
    If people were rain,
    I was a drizzle,
    and she a hurricane
    -Looking For Alaska

  15. FrankConnor FrankConnor
    posted a quote
    March 28, 2014 7:20am UTC
    I wanted to be one of those people
    who have streaks to maintain,
    who scorch the ground with their intensity.
    But for now,
    at least I know such people,
    and they needed me,
    just like comets need tails.
    -Looking For Alaska-

  16. FrankConnor FrankConnor
    posted a quote
    March 28, 2014 7:16am UTC
    Why do you smoke so damn fast?
    He smiled, his smile bordering on insanity, yet his eyes betrayed the clearness of his mind.
    "You all smoke to enjoy it.
    I smoke to die."
    -adapted from Looking For Alaska-

  17. FrankConnor FrankConnor
    posted a quote
    April 5, 2013 4:45am UTC
    Back from Barcelona,
    Apologies for my absence lately,
    But life has been so good,
    and I no longer have the time to be here every day.
    And honestly?
    I wish you all the same.
    I wish you all too little time to spend with the friends you made here.
    I wish you to little time, because you're having too much to do, enjoying life.
    I'll try to be here as often as I can,
    Greetings and a Happy Easter!

  18. FrankConnor FrankConnor
    posted a quote
    January 23, 2013 8:14am UTC
    Imagine...
    Imagine deciding to live on.
    Imagine fleeing to self-harm, and smoking, even drugs once or twice, if you could get your hands on it.
    Imagine deciding to change your image. No more thinkiing out loud, or philosophy, or even complex comments. Imagine studying others.
    Imagine discovering the joy of music. Imagine fleeing into this world, using it as your example. copying expressions used in songs, words spoken by your favourite band members, being a tough guy Imagine dressing like a punker, even though you get beaten for it at home, because you want people to respect you at school.
    And then imagine your mother coming home.
    She's angry at you, while you tried to stay strong for her, while you did everything you can just to stay alive. Imagine that your grades have dropped from A's to D's.
    Imagine your parents divorcing, and you learning to hide behind a wall of indifference, of locking away all emotions.
    Imagine living like that. NO emotions at all. You keep them stored inside you.
    But they build up...
    and you let them out.
    Imagine cutting yourself, burning yourself.
    Imagine hiding the scars, for years.
    Imagine your parents divorcing, leaving them both poor.
    Imagine your mother without a job, and your father heartbroken.
    Imagine time passing.
    Stuck in that same situation, for years.
    Imagine your grandfather dying.
    Imagine yourself at the age of 14.
    Imagine, finding a friend.
    Imagine, starting to be accepted.
    Not as who you are, but as who you pretend to be.
    Imagine your mother breaking down again.
    Imagine her starting to drink again.
    Imagine her being diagnosed with schizofrenia.
    Imagine it getting worse.
    Imagine her thinking you want to harm her.
    Imagine it becoming too much for you to keep on hiding, to keep on storing inside of you.
    Imagine your first suicide attempt.
    Imagine being sent into therapy.
    Imagine the therapist not caring.
    Imagine yourself, hiding behind your wall once more.
    Imagine your father making career, getting rich.
    Imagine your mother with too little money to pay the electricity.
    Imagine realising, that's how the entire world works. Some have all, others have nothing.
    Inequality is the way society works.
    Imagine your second suicide attempt.
    Imagine going back in therapy.
    Imagine hiding, once more.
    Imagine starting to steal things, without value, like paperclips, and pieces of chalk, because you feel like you should.
    Imagine having gaps in your memory.
    Imagine forgetting all your problems sometimes, and feeling all powerful.
    Imagine breaking down right after that, and feel crushed by life.
    Imagine not understanding what's wrong with you.
    Imagine your third suicide attempt.
    Time goes by, and your stuck in your situation
    Imagine you're 16.
    Imagine meeting your best friends girlfriend.
    Imagine falling in love...
    Imagine doing nothing, because you don't want to hurt him.
    Imagine them breaking up.
    Imagine her calling you.
    Imagine dating her...
    Imagine her breaking your heart.
    You were something she needed to get over him.
    Imagine your friend not letting your down, even though you dated his ex, days after they broke up.
    Imagine him taking you to therapy.
    Imagine it working...
    Imagine finally hearing what's wrong with you.
    Imagine hearing you think in a different way, which is why others don't understand you, and you don't understand them.
    Imagine being diagnosed as hypersensitive, and rating 148 on the Wechsler IQ test.
    Imagine being diagnosed with a manic depression, and Kleptomania.
    Imagine being diagnosed with a slight form of Schizofrenia, explaining the blanks in your memory, and the hallucinations you sometimes have (Playing imaginary games as a 12 year old, for example)
    Imagine your therapist having a baby, sending you to a replacement therapist.
    Imagine yourself, behind this computer, writing out everything that went wrong in your life, asking people to imagine what it would be like.
    And imagine starting to feel better, finding strength in the friends you have made, the music you play, the hobbies you have.
    Imagine still being crushed, by the problems at home, by your problems at school, by the problems in the world.
    Imagine finding true happiness in helping others...
    Imagine being me.

  19. FrankConnor FrankConnor
    posted a quote
    January 23, 2013 7:37am UTC
    Imagine...
    Imagine being me, at the age of 12.
    What would you feel?
    Depressed? Unhappy? Scared of life? In pain? Misunderstood? How about suicidal?
    Imagine feeling all those. Imagine having no one you can tell about it. Imagine the beatings getting worse, the bullying getting worse, your brother simply leaving the house, "because he can't deal with the drama around". Imagine taking it all personal. It has to be your fault, right?
    Imagine planning your suicide.
    Imagine realising something.
    Imagine realising, how guilty people will feel. Imagine realising the bullies will think it's their fault, your dad thinking it's his fault, your brother thinking it's his fault, your mother thinking it's her fault.
    Imagine not wanting that.
    What do you do then?
    What do you do?

  20. FrankConnor FrankConnor
    posted a quote
    January 23, 2013 7:02am UTC
    Imagine...
    Imagine living in a happy family.
    Mom, dad, and older brother, and you.
    A 12 year old boy, brown eyes, a little short for his age, maybe a bit chubby, and all innocense.
    Seems like a nice thing to be, right?
    Then imagine finding out your mother's an alcoholic. She starts drinking more and more, and refuses going out her room, unless she needs to get some more drinks.
    Imagine her having an accident, a serious one.
    Imagine having her sent to a rehab facility, for a full year. No visit's during the first 4 months.
    Imagine your dad. Imagine his company being sold, and his job at risk.
    Imagine him having to take care of the entire household, and his job, because his wife is in rehab.
    Imagine the stress he must be in.
    Can you feel it?
    Imagine it becoming too much.
    Imagine you, doing something wrong. Imagine him, beating you, hard. He can't deal with you messing up right now.
    Now imagine school.
    It's your first year at high school.
    Imagine having one friend from primary school in your class, your best friend. The one you always told everything.
    Imagine having him tell everything to the entire class. Imagine him saying you cry a lot, and you use to play imaginary games, and how you always thought you knew everything the best.
    Imagine feeling different. In such a way, that people don't understand what you mean when you talk to them, and you not understanding it when they're talking amongst each other.
    Imagine them marking you as the weird guy...
    Imagine them starting to bully you.
    Imagine them pushing you over, yelling at you, spitting on you. Imagine every one refusing to sit next to you.
    Imagine starting to save on clothing, and start wearing hand-me-downs, because the rehab fo your mother is too expensive. Imagine people laughing at your clothes. Calling you the homeless boy.
    Syaing your parents give you those clothes because they want you to look ridiculous. Imagine your best friend, leading them.
    Imagine your brother, 6 years older then you are. Imagine him trying to scare you all day.
    Imagine you breaking down, starting to sob and cry. Imagine your father beating you, even harder, and locking you up in a closet to teach you, while you're afraid of the dark.
    Imagine not daring to tell anyone what's wrong. Because if people know things, they can use it against you.
    Imagine trusting no one, imagine every one leaving you at the side.
    Imagine feeling lost, alone and hurt. Imagine being broken.
    Can you imagine that?
    Then welcome, to my life as a 12 year old...

:)

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