Witty Profiles

Colgate

1. Colgate
   posted a quote
   May 24, 2012 4:29pm UTC
   I didn't trip...
   IWAS JUST TESTING GRAVITY..YEP, IT STILL WORKS.
   
   👍 this is good · read the comments · 17 points
2. Colgate
   posted a quote
   May 23, 2012 4:16pm UTC
   Going to a friend's house:
   Normal People: Oh what a lovely home this is!
   Me: What's your wifi password?
   
   👍 this is good · read the comments · 1616 points
3. Colgate
   posted a quote
   May 22, 2012 5:12pm UTC
   Michael Jackson Nothing is ever black and white.
   39 minutes ago · comment · like
   Alex Sandwich Pandas
   17 minutes ago ago · Like
   Rhea Witty You
   17 minutes ago ago · Like
   
   👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 5 points
4. Colgate
   posted a quote
   May 22, 2012 4:48pm UTC
   Clapping the longest during assembly,
   because you're a fearless b*stard.
   
   👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 5 points
5. Colgate
   posted a quote
   May 22, 2012 4:38pm UTC
   trying to complete tasks
   before the microwave hits 00:00 like your life depends on it.
   
   👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 7 points
6. Colgate
   posted a quote
   May 22, 2012 4:12pm UTC
   My Shower Has Only Two Options,
   3rd Degree Burns or Skinny Dipping In Antartica.
   
   👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 2 points
7. Colgate
   posted a quote
   May 22, 2012 2:31am UTC
   Texting the person
   next to you because you can't say them out loud.
   
   👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 4 points
8. Colgate
   posted a quote
   May 21, 2012 4:54pm UTC
   Buy a ship,
   Name it Relation, now you ahve a Relationship.
   
   👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 10 points
9. Colgate
   posted a quote
   May 21, 2012 4:46pm UTC
   Without Facebook,
   I probably wouldn't of wished you a Happy Birthday.
   
   👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 283 points
10. Colgate
    posted a quote
    May 21, 2012 4:34pm UTC
    My entire school:
    "You don't talk much."
    Me:
    "Because you're all c*nts."
    
    👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 5 points
11. Colgate
    posted a quote
    May 21, 2012 4:25pm UTC
    *Types in passwod*
    Incorrect password
    *Types in password again*
    Incorrect password
    ARE YOU F*CKING KIDDING ME? THAT IS MY..oh..caps lock.
    
    👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 18 points
12. Colgate
    posted a quote
    May 21, 2012 4:22pm UTC
    Awkward eye contact
    With people in cars next to you at red lights.
    
    👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 9 points
13. Colgate
    posted a quote
    May 21, 2012 4:10pm UTC
    When I was a kid,
    I pretended Tic-tacs were pills and drugs, and Grape Juice was wine.
    
    👍 this is good · read the comments · 29 points
14. Colgate
    posted a quote
    May 21, 2012 4:06pm UTC
    When someone
    gives you food out of no-where, and you're like;
    "What did you do to it?"
    
    👍 this is good · read the comments · 648 points
15. Colgate
    posted a quote
    May 21, 2012 3:59pm UTC
    Confirm
    Are you sure you want to delete that b*tch from your life?
    Yes
    No
    
    👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 4 points
16. Colgate
    posted a quote
    May 21, 2012 3:54pm UTC
    I can't clean my room
    because I get distracted by the cool things I find.
    
    👍 this is good · read the comments · 9 points
17. Colgate
    posted a quote
    May 21, 2012 3:52pm UTC
    When I was little,
    I used to think the moon followed me whenever I was in the car.
    
    👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 7 points

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