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Carebearkeri

ImOnlyATeen
posted a quote
July 23, 2012 11:02pm UTC

me when i get a hair cut.
there: wow! my hair looks pretty good right now.
when i get home: what the f/ck?!
tumblr

👍 this is good · read the comments · 1086 points

livin_life_young_and_in_love
posted a quote
July 23, 2012 10:54pm UTC

Dear Face,
please get prettier.
Dear Stomach,
please get smaller.
Dear Legs,
please get more sexy.
♥♥ mdeDear Personality,
please get more appealing.
Dear Body,
please get more attractive.
Dear Self,
please stop being such a failure.HS

👍 this is good · read the comments · 573 points

posted a quote
January 1, 1970 12:00am UTC

This quote does not exist.

👍 this is good · read the comments · 1571 points

BravoSierra
posted a quote
July 24, 2012 8:15am UTC

Me: Oh look, a bruise.
Me: I bet that will hurt if I poke it.Me:Bruise:Me:Bruise:Me:Bruise:Me:*pokes bruise*

👍 this is good · read the comments · 1304 points

BlackButterflies
posted a quote
July 24, 2012 3:18am UTC

click to see this quote

👍 this is good · read the comments · 1992 points

summer_girlxo
posted a quote
July 23, 2012 10:55pm UTC

click to see this quote

👍 this is good · read the comments · 864 points

JustWaiting
posted a quote
July 23, 2012 7:45pm UTC

Patrick: Spongebob! My face is leaking
Spongebob: No it's no Patrick, You're just sweating from all the exercise you're doing.
Patrick: Woah woah woah. Exercise? I did not sign up for this
And this is why I love Patrick

👍 this is good · read the comments · 608 points

sammy*
posted a quote
July 23, 2012 6:14pm UTC

leaning when the bowling ball
goes the wrong way.
nmf/nmq
twopairsofshades made this format, not me.

👍 this is good · read the comments · 899 points

ImOnlyATeen
posted a quote
July 23, 2012 7:14pm UTC

me: why are those guys staring at me?
me:is there something on my face?
me:is there something on my shirt?
me:they're probably laughing at how ugly i am.
me:they probably find it amusing how fat i am.
friend:maybe they think you're cute.
me:are you stupid or something?
tumblr.

👍 this is good · read the comments · 2205 points

LandonIsWitty
posted a quote
July 23, 2012 7:34pm UTC

Me in the shower:
Me: *turns water on*
Me: *grabs phone*
Me: *sits in the bathroom on witty for 7 minutes*
Me: *checks time*
Me:
Me:
Me:
Me: oh chiz
Me: *gets in shower*
Me: HOLY JEEEEZEZ OHMYGAWWWSH MY FOOT IS BURNING LIKE SHAWTY ON THE DANCE FLOOR
Me: *jumps out and turns hot water down*
Me: ahh, this'll be better
Me: *steps in shower once again*
Me: COLD COLD COLD ASDFGHJKL ITS SO COLD IS THIS FUUCKING ANTARCTICA OW OW OW OW OWWWW
Me: *turns hot water up a teeeeeeeeeeny tiiiiiiiiiiiiny bit*
Me: okay, this will work.
Me: holy crap it actually worked
Me: ahhhhhhhhhhhh
Me: NEVERMIND I'LL FIND SOMEONE LIKE YOOOUUUUU!
Me: ok seriously, gotta get clean
Me:
Me:
Me:
Me:
Me: oh right, soap.
Me: *scrubbing arms and legs*
Me: omg wtf why am i so hairy
Me: lol jk, i'm a dude of course i'm hairy!
Me: *washes hair*
Me: *washes face*
Me: *drops shampoo*
Me:
Me:
Me:
Me: my family probably thinks i'm dead
Me: better make sure they know I'm alive
Me: I'M SLIM SHADY YES I'M DA REAL SHADY, ALL YOU OTHAA SOMETHIN SOMETHIN ARE JUST IMATATINN
Me:
Me:
Me:
Me:
Me: guess i better get out now..
Me: *turns off water and gets out*
Me: *realizes i forgot to get a towel*
Me:
Me:
Me:
Me:
Me: *sprints naked to the hall closet and blindly grabs nearest bath towel*
Me:
Me:
Me:
Me:
Me: shh that never happened
Me:
Me:
Me: *sits on bed in only a towel making quote about taking a shower*
lol my quote & format! should i keep making these kinds of quotes?(:

👍 this is good · read the comments · 2073 points

AlyssaBreanne*
posted a quote
July 22, 2012 10:28pm UTC

ADMIT IT.
You aren't the same person you were a year ago.

👍 this is good · read the comments · 406 points

pleasespeaktomyface
posted a quote
July 22, 2012 9:50pm UTC

Mom: Run to the store and get some milk. If they have eggs, get six.
Me: Okay.
Me: *goes to the store*
Me: *comes back with milk*
Mom: Why'd you get six things of milk!?
Me: Because they had eggs!

👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 605 points

LandonIsWitty
posted a quote
July 22, 2012 11:58pm UTC

me: omg its only 7 i have time to go on witty!
me: lol, quotes.
me: ahahhahah
me: oh, thats original. not.
me: "i'm a guy, gimme favs, wah"
me: was i like that?
me: ... hope not. jeez.
me: *adds quote*
me: *eats dinner while still on witty*
me: *gets yelled at by mom*
me: *takes shower*
me: *brings phone in shower so i can still read quotes*
me: *adds quote from shower*
me: *gets out, gets ready to sleep*
me: *checks time*
clock: 11:57 am
me:
clock:
me:
clock:
me:
clock:
me: h o l y f u d g e
me:
me:
me:
me:
me: just enough time to add a quote about my failure of a life!
me: *adds quote*
me: *stalks quote until it gets a fave*
me:
me:
me:
me:
me:
me: this has been a productive night.

👍 this is good · read the comments · 931 points

AlNicholas
posted a quote
July 22, 2012 9:30pm UTC

girls: why are all boys so shallow
girls: ew that boy doesn’t even have a six pack lol

👍 this is good · read the comments · 639 points

pakiprincezz4
posted a quote
March 19, 2012 5:10pm UTC

Only Smart People Will Get This...
2+2= Fish
3+3= Eight
7+7= Triangle
❤
Format by: mwittym

👍 this is good · read the comments · 1700 points

posted a quote
January 1, 1970 12:00am UTC

This quote does not exist.

👍 this is good · read the comments · 2098 points

MaggiieBear
posted a quote
March 19, 2012 2:02pm UTC

Can you relate to me ? #2
-you and your bestfriend can say one word, and crack up.

👍 this is good · read the comments · 1867 points

BravoSierra
posted a quote
March 19, 2012 3:09pm UTC

That awkward moment
When someone yells at you for clicking your pen and you have to click it one more time to use it.

👍 this is good · read the comments · 2084 points

idance
posted a quote
March 17, 2012 3:16pm UTC

boy: you know what?
girl: what?
boy: next time i see you, don't wear that skirt again. it's too revaeling.
girl: okay, whatever.
boy: a dress that reaches to your ankles.. and wear long white gloves that reach to your elbows.
girl: what?
boy: trust me.
girl: what are you trying to do? hide me from everyone?
boy: do your hair up well real pretty.
girl: are you listening to what i'm saying? you're so conservative, don't choke me like this.. are you kidding me?
boy: i'm dead serious.
girl: you know i don't like guys who boss me around.
boy: ...wear a veil.
girl: ...what?
boy: wear this ring too.
girl: .....
boy: marry me ♥

👍 this is good · read the comments · 1976 points

Love_To_Laugh123
posted a quote
March 19, 2012 3:44pm UTC

First Day of School:
30 pencils, 64 crayons, 20 pens, 12 markers, 10 notebooks, 3 binders, 5 book covers, billions of peices of paper, and soo much more.
Middle of March:
1 pencil you found on the ground in science.

👍 this is good · read the comments · 2876 points

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