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capsized*
posted a quote
November 3, 2013 3:04pm UTC

there are nice americans
there are rude americans
there are nice brits
there are rude brits
there are nice canadians
there’s justin bieber

👍 this is good · read the comments · 106 points

* Sabaism *
posted a quote
November 3, 2013 12:00am UTC

Some online girl: Go die.
Me: Oh no. I was just told by some one miles away to go die. Goodbye world.

👍 this is good · read the comments · 157 points

spence*
posted a quote
November 7, 2013 1:11pm UTC

if I start a sentence with “dude” you better listen up
because it’s gonna be important

👍 this is good · read the comments · 117 points

Hale_Storm18
posted a quote
November 4, 2013 8:47pm UTC

you know you're getting old when you watch the little mermaid and when ariel says "i'm 16 years old. I'm not a child anymore." and you just sit there like yes you fcking are young lady stop it

👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 111 points

Cammie
posted a quote
November 2, 2013 12:03pm UTC

see that girl you called a bítch?
she didn't hear it say it louder.

👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 100 points

BravoSierra
posted a quote
November 5, 2013 11:50am UTC

don't text me with a boring àss conversation.
wasting my unlimited texting and shít.

👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 111 points

BravoSierra
posted a quote
November 3, 2013 10:34pm UTC

me: *wakes up with one sock*
me: whoa crazy night last night

👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 110 points

Hale_Storm18
posted a quote
November 4, 2013 4:40pm UTC

i would eat healthy but remember that 1 time adam & eve ate an apple in the garden of eden & doomed all of humanity so idk better not risk it.

👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 118 points

ChocoTaco
posted a quote
November 3, 2013 7:42pm UTC

Person: Which band member is your favorite?
Me: So you're asking me to choose between my husbands?

👍 this is good · read the comments · 110 points

๑°`°º¤ø тнe_ιмpoѕѕιвle_gιrl_wнo_waιтed ø¤º°`°๑ *
posted a quote
November 7, 2013 7:13pm UTC

If I lay here
If I just lay here
would you get my charger because my laptop is about to die

👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 144 points

happiest*
posted a quote
November 3, 2013 2:35pm UTC

the only reason i go to school is because i donn’t wanna be an unemployed college drop out. i wanna be an unemployed college graduate

👍 this is good · read the comments · 113 points

happiest*
posted a quote
November 6, 2013 2:25pm UTC

*dad voice* i’ll fix it!
*breaks it 100x worse and then gets mad at everyone else*

👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 131 points

Ethanol
posted a quote
November 6, 2013 10:58am UTC

what others get scolded about: getting high, gettin drunk, having drugs, etc
what i get scolded about: leaving the bathroom door open

👍 this is good · read the comments · 121 points

BravoSierra
posted a quote
November 4, 2013 8:21pm UTC

I broke a finger tonight.
But on the other hand, I'm completely fine.

👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 124 points

happiest*
posted a quote
November 2, 2013 6:43pm UTC

one time my sister said “omfg” in a text and my dad was like “u don’t need that f” and took away her phone

👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 115 points

BravoSierra
posted a quote
November 4, 2013 1:11pm UTC

person: what's your favorite season?
me: probably season 5
person:
me:
person:
me: oh, you mean like summer or winter, ok, my bad

👍 this is good · read the comments · 126 points

happiest*
posted a quote
November 7, 2013 2:14pm UTC

imagine having someone who only wanted you and didn’t flirt with anyone else and didn’t make you uncertain whether they liked you or not

👍 this is good · read the comments · 158 points

BravoSierra
posted a quote
November 4, 2013 11:14am UTC

"I'd date a fan," does not mean
"I'd date a 12 year old who knows more about me than I do."

👍 this is good · read the comments · 128 points

kristabff
posted a quote
November 3, 2013 12:17pm UTC

Me looking at cute boys: help i'm falling and i can't get up

👍 this is good · read the comments · 136 points

happiest*
posted a quote
November 2, 2013 4:49pm UTC

have you ever realised that sleeping is just your eyes staring at your eyelids all night long

👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 124 points

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